Question for child health experts: Does a tween/teen HAVE TO shower every single day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is absolutely not essential to shower every day. In fact, it is good practice to experiment with a personal preference for shower/bath frequency. Personally, I shower every other day and feel uncomfortable if I shower less frequently. Showering daily-unless particularly dirty or sweaty- makes my skin and hair dry. I have close friends and family and am a successful professional. I interact with people in public regularly. Maybe I am super stinky on those non-shower days (as you claim) but if so, it has not hindered me in life in any capacity.

Are you an active teen in the throws of puberty? Or a middle aged woman working from home?

“Throes”, moron.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many people here are acting as though there are only two options - shower daily or stink.

That’s ridiculous.

Most of the odor created by the human body comes from pits and privates. On the days a person doesn’t shower, of course they should wash their pits and privates - leaving all the other non-smelly areas of skin free from over washing and drying out. Dry shampoo works wonders for hair that is a little too shiny between washes.

Honestly some of you are obsessive to an unhealthy degree.

And most definitely the therapist was WAY out of line to suggest to a 15 year old patient that there is something wrong with her for showering every other day.

And super rigid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Different bodies, different lifestyles, different needs to shower.

If your teen is leading a lifestyle while they only need to shower every 3 days, that is concerning (lazy, sedentary, depressed)

Not every physical endeavor is sweaty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daily showering is NOT necessary for good health for most people, and in fact is likely undermining good health in some cases - never mind the waste of water and energy involved. This is entirely an American thing, we have been brainwashed by advertising of products we don’t need to be clean and healthy.

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/showering-daily-is-it-necessary-2019062617193

It is the cultural norm and expectation here. In other countries, various unpleasant body odors are common place. They aren’t here and you will stand out in a negative way. Especially in a group where no one else smells, it’s obvious where the smell is coming from

So then we agree that it's not medically necessary and if there is no BO it's not culturally necessary either. I just don't give a rats ass that you think I should smell like Dove every day.

Except medical professionals DO recommend daily showering. Where did you get the idea that they don't? OP doesn't say what her qualifications are or why she was even "supporting" the teen in her OP. Maybe she should stick to her day job and not question the professionals in charge of helping said teen.

Literally from various of my doctors (dermatologists).

Stop making sweeping generalizations for something that's nothing more than a personal preference.

Please stop repeating what your dermatologist recommends for your old-lady dry skin. No one cares and it isn’t applicable here

Of course it's applicable. You are just rude and uneducated. You think your preference for daily showers (which no one cares about either) is somehow applicable to everyone.

1) I've had dry skin my whole life. Sine birth.
2) my child has my genetics which means they have dry skin and eczema that had to be treated with steroids and antibiotics when they were a toddler. Even now as a teen they can't use soaps daily or it creates an issue.

Why are you so hell-bent on making everyone fit your stupid mold? Do what you want and leave the rest of us alone.

OP never mentioned her teen having eczema or unusually dry skin, if that were the case, I’m sure she would have mentioned it. It isn’t, this is YOUR problem, but not this teen’s.

Why would a teen need to disclose that to the therapist or OP?

Perhaps daily showering practices are better discussed with medical doctors and dermatologists and not in group settings such as OP described. Perhaps the whole point was to shame the teen which is what OP took the issue with and I think it's despicable. Your personal preferences are your own. Leave the rest of us alone.

If OP’s kid had a medical condition where a doctor specifically told her not to bathe daily, she wouldn’t be here crowd-sourcing if we all think teens to shower daily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the teens and adults I know who only shower every other day or third day do in fact smell. They think they don’t, but they do.

Didn't take you long. You must have an alert set for shower posts.

Admit it, you're the 3 times a day underwear changer.

OP, it's perfectly fine to not shower every day. Ignore these nutjobs.

Look, just because you are nose blind to your own pungent funk doesn't mean others don't notice it.

DP here. I have one teen that needs a daily shower and one that doesn’t. Sorry nuance is hard for you.

Just says one of your kids is inactive and lazy.

Jesus woman. You are a massive b1tch.

x1 million

WTF is wrong with you?

Facts. If you are sweating then shower. Get some exercise it will help you! Many more benefits than being so lazy you never break a sweat and would rarely need a shower. That is nothing to brag about.

That doesn’t answer the question: WTF is wrong with you?

- shower daily

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daily showering is NOT necessary for good health for most people, and in fact is likely undermining good health in some cases - never mind the waste of water and energy involved. This is entirely an American thing, we have been brainwashed by advertising of products we don’t need to be clean and healthy.

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/showering-daily-is-it-necessary-2019062617193

It is the cultural norm and expectation here. In other countries, various unpleasant body odors are common place. They aren’t here and you will stand out in a negative way. Especially in a group where no one else smells, it’s obvious where the smell is coming from

So then we agree that it's not medically necessary and if there is no BO it's not culturally necessary either. I just don't give a rats ass that you think I should smell like Dove every day.

Except medical professionals DO recommend daily showering. Where did you get the idea that they don't? OP doesn't say what her qualifications are or why she was even "supporting" the teen in her OP. Maybe she should stick to her day job and not question the professionals in charge of helping said teen.

Literally from various of my doctors (dermatologists).

Stop making sweeping generalizations for something that's nothing more than a personal preference.

Please stop repeating what your dermatologist recommends for your old-lady dry skin. No one cares and it isn’t applicable here

Of course it's applicable. You are just rude and uneducated. You think your preference for daily showers (which no one cares about either) is somehow applicable to everyone.

1) I've had dry skin my whole life. Sine birth.
2) my child has my genetics which means they have dry skin and eczema that had to be treated with steroids and antibiotics when they were a toddler. Even now as a teen they can't use soaps daily or it creates an issue.

Why are you so hell-bent on making everyone fit your stupid mold? Do what you want and leave the rest of us alone.

OP never mentioned her teen having eczema or unusually dry skin, if that were the case, I’m sure she would have mentioned it. It isn’t, this is YOUR problem, but not this teen’s.

Why would a teen need to disclose that to the therapist or OP?

Perhaps daily showering practices are better discussed with medical doctors and dermatologists and not in group settings such as OP described. Perhaps the whole point was to shame the teen which is what OP took the issue with and I think it's despicable. Your personal preferences are your own. Leave the rest of us alone.

If OP’s kid had a medical condition where a doctor specifically told her not to bathe daily, she wouldn’t be here crowd-sourcing if we all think teens to shower daily.

I don't think she is talking about her own child. Why do you care so much whether someone else's teen showers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daily showering is NOT necessary for good health for most people, and in fact is likely undermining good health in some cases - never mind the waste of water and energy involved. This is entirely an American thing, we have been brainwashed by advertising of products we don’t need to be clean and healthy.

https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/showering-daily-is-it-necessary-2019062617193

It is the cultural norm and expectation here. In other countries, various unpleasant body odors are common place. They aren’t here and you will stand out in a negative way. Especially in a group where no one else smells, it’s obvious where the smell is coming from

So then we agree that it's not medically necessary and if there is no BO it's not culturally necessary either. I just don't give a rats ass that you think I should smell like Dove every day.

Except medical professionals DO recommend daily showering. Where did you get the idea that they don't? OP doesn't say what her qualifications are or why she was even "supporting" the teen in her OP. Maybe she should stick to her day job and not question the professionals in charge of helping said teen.

Literally from various of my doctors (dermatologists).

Stop making sweeping generalizations for something that's nothing more than a personal preference.

Please stop repeating what your dermatologist recommends for your old-lady dry skin. No one cares and it isn’t applicable here

Of course it's applicable. You are just rude and uneducated. You think your preference for daily showers (which no one cares about either) is somehow applicable to everyone.

1) I've had dry skin my whole life. Sine birth.
2) my child has my genetics which means they have dry skin and eczema that had to be treated with steroids and antibiotics when they were a toddler. Even now as a teen they can't use soaps daily or it creates an issue.

Why are you so hell-bent on making everyone fit your stupid mold? Do what you want and leave the rest of us alone.

OP never mentioned her teen having eczema or unusually dry skin, if that were the case, I’m sure she would have mentioned it. It isn’t, this is YOUR problem, but not this teen’s.

Why would a teen need to disclose that to the therapist or OP?

Perhaps daily showering practices are better discussed with medical doctors and dermatologists and not in group settings such as OP described. Perhaps the whole point was to shame the teen which is what OP took the issue with and I think it's despicable. Your personal preferences are your own. Leave the rest of us alone.

If OP’s kid had a medical condition where a doctor specifically told her not to bathe daily, she wouldn’t be here crowd-sourcing if we all think teens to shower daily.

I don't think she is talking about her own child. Why do you care so much whether someone else's teen showers?

She asked! If she didn’t want opinions then she shouldn’t have posted the question

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Different bodies, different lifestyles, different needs to shower.

If your teen is leading a lifestyle while they only need to shower every 3 days, that is concerning (lazy, sedentary, depressed)

Someone this rigid in their thinking is probably somewhere on the spectrum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, first of all THANK YOU for all the answers, I appreciate everyone who took the question seriously even though there was a range of answers.

To answer the couple of people who asked what the issue the meeting was to discuss, it was bedtime routines that will help her sleep better. It's not that I silently disagreed with a nightly shower as a way to relax, I get that. It's that the therapist said "How about you do ______ every night before you take your shower to save time, then take your nightly shower, then - " and the teen interrupted and said "I don't shower every night. Usually every other night." And the therapist was visually surprised and bothered, and instead of asking questions like "So, tell me about your choice not to shower every night, or is there something that stops you from doing it?" And she said "I just don't feel like it every night" and then the therapist went on to say she had to, that it was the only way to stay adequately clean and not smell. AS IF your genital health will actually be compromised and your body odor noticeable if you don't, in every case.

That's what I took issue with, since the therapist had been seeing the girl in person for over a year and no one had complained about any smell or odor, she'd never been bullied or made fun of about it (bullying wasn't an issue at all in her case), and she has many friends.

Again, I am fine with the idea of a shower every night to help relax and make it more likey she'll fall asleep faster (getting to sleep was sometimes an issue for her so overall the parents are being advised to have a more structured routine, which makes perfect sense). It was the therapist going straight in on insisting on daily showers and telling her it was a healthy body/healthy privates issue and very important she do it daily that bugged the hell out of me.

Anonymous wrote:This is why professionals need to give a basis for their recommendations, so you can see if the premise makes sense. Daily bathing is not, for example, a medical/health necessity, but I can see where for some people (adhd, depression, etc) the recommendation is more about sticking to a routine or demonstrating ability to care for oneself. Does not sound like this was needed here though.

Thank you for this, I explained the bigger point above, but you're right, it was originally about the routine but there were other things she offered as ideas to get to sleep faster that the teen or her parents shot down, and the therapist was very flexible. But this she was like "Oh, NO, you MUST SHOWER DAILY!!!" Specifically for medical/health reasons, and that is what bugged me because I've never ever had anyone (and I used to have to train temporary care parents and adoptive parents in the basic necessities and basic practices and of course hygeine was important for both physical and emotional/mental reasons, but never was a daily shower insisted on by the experts. Daily recommended, but clean and at least a few showers/baths a week was mandatory.

Thank you and thanks everyone!

Sorry. But your therapist is right. She really should be showering daily. Perhaps her delivery if that message could be better. But you should have been telling her this all along. So I guess someone else had to.

As you have read from various posts here, there is NO medical need to shower daily. Different bodies have different needs. Not all bodies smell after 23 hours. A lot depends on activity level, climate, and temperature/humidity, too.


The problem with what the therapist said is that she framed it as a medical necessity. That's simply not true.

[Anonymous]

I have no doubt that people who lather and scrub their entire body every day end up stinking on the days they don't.

I have doubts anyone has to wipe sweat off the couch unless they shower daily when they are not post-workout or mid-heat wave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the teens and adults I know who only shower every other day or third day do in fact smell. They think they don’t, but they do.

Didn't take you long. You must have an alert set for shower posts.

Admit it, you're the 3 times a day underwear changer.

OP, it's perfectly fine to not shower every day. Ignore these nutjobs.

Look, just because you are nose blind to your own pungent funk doesn't mean others don't notice it.

DP here. I have one teen that needs a daily shower and one that doesn’t. Sorry nuance is hard for you.

Just says one of your kids is inactive and lazy.

Jesus woman. You are a massive b1tch.

x1 million

WTF is wrong with you?

Facts. If you are sweating then shower. Get some exercise it will help you! Many more benefits than being so lazy you never break a sweat and would rarely need a shower. That is nothing to brag about.

NP. How old are you?

How much do you exercise? Do you ever break a sweat?

I exercise and shower daily.

How old are you?

I also exercise and shower daily. Age is irrelevant. What age is told not to exercise or shower after? Certainly not teens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, first of all THANK YOU for all the answers, I appreciate everyone who took the question seriously even though there was a range of answers.

To answer the couple of people who asked what the issue the meeting was to discuss, it was bedtime routines that will help her sleep better. It's not that I silently disagreed with a nightly shower as a way to relax, I get that. It's that the therapist said "How about you do ______ every night before you take your shower to save time, then take your nightly shower, then - " and the teen interrupted and said "I don't shower every night. Usually every other night." And the therapist was visually surprised and bothered, and instead of asking questions like "So, tell me about your choice not to shower every night, or is there something that stops you from doing it?" And she said "I just don't feel like it every night" and then the therapist went on to say she had to, that it was the only way to stay adequately clean and not smell. AS IF your genital health will actually be compromised and your body odor noticeable if you don't, in every case.

That's what I took issue with, since the therapist had been seeing the girl in person for over a year and no one had complained about any smell or odor, she'd never been bullied or made fun of about it (bullying wasn't an issue at all in her case), and she has many friends.

Again, I am fine with the idea of a shower every night to help relax and make it more likey she'll fall asleep faster (getting to sleep was sometimes an issue for her so overall the parents are being advised to have a more structured routine, which makes perfect sense). It was the therapist going straight in on insisting on daily showers and telling her it was a healthy body/healthy privates issue and very important she do it daily that bugged the hell out of me.

Anonymous wrote:This is why professionals need to give a basis for their recommendations, so you can see if the premise makes sense. Daily bathing is not, for example, a medical/health necessity, but I can see where for some people (adhd, depression, etc) the recommendation is more about sticking to a routine or demonstrating ability to care for oneself. Does not sound like this was needed here though.

Thank you for this, I explained the bigger point above, but you're right, it was originally about the routine but there were other things she offered as ideas to get to sleep faster that the teen or her parents shot down, and the therapist was very flexible. But this she was like "Oh, NO, you MUST SHOWER DAILY!!!" Specifically for medical/health reasons, and that is what bugged me because I've never ever had anyone (and I used to have to train temporary care parents and adoptive parents in the basic necessities and basic practices and of course hygeine was important for both physical and emotional/mental reasons, but never was a daily shower insisted on by the experts. Daily recommended, but clean and at least a few showers/baths a week was mandatory.

Thank you and thanks everyone!

Sorry. But your therapist is right. She really should be showering daily. Perhaps her delivery if that message could be better. But you should have been telling her this all along. So I guess someone else had to.

As you have read from various posts here, there is NO medical need to shower daily. Different bodies have different needs. Not all bodies smell after 23 hours. A lot depends on activity level, climate, and temperature/humidity, too.


The problem with what the therapist said is that she framed it as a medical necessity. That's simply not true.

Dermatologists recommend daily showering. Is that not medical advice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the teens and adults I know who only shower every other day or third day do in fact smell. They think they don’t, but they do.

Didn't take you long. You must have an alert set for shower posts.

Admit it, you're the 3 times a day underwear changer.

OP, it's perfectly fine to not shower every day. Ignore these nutjobs.

Look, just because you are nose blind to your own pungent funk doesn't mean others don't notice it.

DP here. I have one teen that needs a daily shower and one that doesn’t. Sorry nuance is hard for you.

Just says one of your kids is inactive and lazy.

Jesus woman. You are a massive b1tch.

x1 million

WTF is wrong with you?

Facts. If you are sweating then shower. Get some exercise it will help you! Many more benefits than being so lazy you never break a sweat and would rarely need a shower. That is nothing to brag about.

That doesn’t answer the question: WTF is wrong with you?

- shower daily

Keep trying. No doctor recommends to not exercise to avoid showering.

[Anonymous]

There is one anti-shower old lady in here sock-pocketing. Go away already. No one cares what your dermatologist advises you to do

[Anonymous]

I am an immigrant and was an exchange student in the US many years ago (as a teen) and received child a child development degree in my home country.
Showering every day was a rule that was presented to me as part of my exchange student orientation.
It never came up as part of any child development course I took later in my home country.
This makes me think it is very society-specific, and the U.S. rules have very much relaxed lately (e.g. it’s not a must to wear different pants or a sweatshirt every day; only the t shirt and underwear and sock must be changed daily).
It’s all very cultural. Physically there is no danger in not showering daily. It might make you a social ostracism target though.