When is too young to get engaged?

[Anonymous]

Marriage is bondage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying young is a great way to build wealth.

Or drown in poverty

Why? You can’t deny that life is easier on a dual income than single income.

Yes but how many women who marry very young continue to work? Typically they don't have established careers and can't handle the cost of childcare at that point.

Just because you marry very young doesn’t mean you’ll have kids immediately. There are reasons to marry as soon as is appropriate, such as acquiring property together.

Property that will bleed you dry.

DH & I bought a house in Bethesda when we were 24 y/o newlyweds. Rented it out for 7 years afterwards while we rented elsewhere. We moved into the house once our renters paid off the mortgage on that house in our early 30s and proceeded to have kids.

Hope you thanked Daddy!

Nope. Just two high five-figure salaries & no debt.

Yeah sure, unless you did this in 1960.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying young is a great way to build wealth.

Or drown in poverty

Why? You can’t deny that life is easier on a dual income than single income.

Yes but how many women who marry very young continue to work? Typically they don't have established careers and can't handle the cost of childcare at that point.

Just because you marry very young doesn’t mean you’ll have kids immediately. There are reasons to marry as soon as is appropriate, such as acquiring property together.

Property that will bleed you dry.

DH & I bought a house in Bethesda when we were 24 y/o newlyweds. Rented it out for 7 years afterwards while we rented elsewhere. We moved into the house once our renters paid off the mortgage on that house in our early 30s and proceeded to have kids.

Hope you thanked Daddy!

Nope. Just two high five-figure salaries & no debt.

Then you can thank Daddy for having no debt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Say that you are happy for them! I would be proud to have raised such responsible, young adults who aren't living an extended adolescence. They sound like mature and capable individuals.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying young is a great way to build wealth.

Or drown in poverty

Why? You can’t deny that life is easier on a dual income than single income.

Yes but how many women who marry very young continue to work? Typically they don't have established careers and can't handle the cost of childcare at that point.

Just because you marry very young doesn’t mean you’ll have kids immediately. There are reasons to marry as soon as is appropriate, such as acquiring property together.

Property that will bleed you dry.

DH & I bought a house in Bethesda when we were 24 y/o newlyweds. Rented it out for 7 years afterwards while we rented elsewhere. We moved into the house once our renters paid off the mortgage on that house in our early 30s and proceeded to have kids.

Hope you thanked Daddy!

Nope. Just two high five-figure salaries & no debt.

Then you can thank Daddy for having no debt.

There is a such thing as scholarships, financial aid & working during school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Yes, they live together in the same tiny apartment and attend the same medical school (when they applied, about 5 months after they started dating, they made it a priority to apply to the same/similar places so they could end up together and were lucky enough to get in their dream med school together). They're planning a 2 year engagement because they're still relatively young (so getting married at 24)

So many red flags here. I do hope it works out for them

I don’t see any red flags here; I don’t know what’s wrong with you.

Np here. But here are the red flags o ser.
Building your future around someone you have known for 5 months.
Applying to the same schools.- limiting options

Living together - sharing expenses thankfully it's only an apartment.

Lots of room for staying together due to inertia and not because it's the right thing for both of them. This also applies to residency applications

Also highly likely that if things don't go as planned one completely crashes and falls apart.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying young is a great way to build wealth.

Or drown in poverty

Why? You can’t deny that life is easier on a dual income than single income.

Yes but how many women who marry very young continue to work? Typically they don't have established careers and can't handle the cost of childcare at that point.

Just because you marry very young doesn’t mean you’ll have kids immediately. There are reasons to marry as soon as is appropriate, such as acquiring property together.

Property that will bleed you dry.

DH & I bought a house in Bethesda when we were 24 y/o newlyweds. Rented it out for 7 years afterwards while we rented elsewhere. We moved into the house once our renters paid off the mortgage on that house in our early 30s and proceeded to have kids.

Hope you thanked Daddy!

Nope. Just two high five-figure salaries & no debt.

Then you can thank Daddy for having no debt.

There is a such thing as scholarships, financial aid & working during school.

Yes but you didn't do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Say that you are happy for them! I would be proud to have raised such responsible, young adults who aren't living an extended adolescence. They sound like mature and capable individuals.

They haven’t accomplished anything (except med school).

Med school isn't an accomplishment. They will have done something when they graduate

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying young is a great way to build wealth.

Or drown in poverty

Why? You can’t deny that life is easier on a dual income than single income.

Yes but how many women who marry very young continue to work? Typically they don't have established careers and can't handle the cost of childcare at that point.

My sister got married in her early twenties and worked in finance supporting her husband through med school. She is super successful two decades later as is her husband.

There’s a difference between college/grad school educated women who marry young and people without these degrees.

I would not advise any young woman today to work and support her boyfriend/ husband and though school.
Too many instances of the woman being left after school is done and she invested her money and time for nothing.

And no there really isn't a difference for women. Only those who have had parents pay for college may avoid a financial hit

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Say that you are happy for them! I would be proud to have raised such responsible, young adults who aren't living an extended adolescence. They sound like mature and capable individuals.

They haven’t accomplished anything (except med school).

Med school isn't an accomplishment. They will have done something when they graduate

Found the communications major.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Yes, they live together in the same tiny apartment and attend the same medical school (when they applied, about 5 months after they started dating, they made it a priority to apply to the same/similar places so they could end up together and were lucky enough to get in their dream med school together). They're planning a 2 year engagement because they're still relatively young (so getting married at 24)

So many red flags here. I do hope it works out for them

I don’t see any red flags here; I don’t know what’s wrong with you.

Np here. But here are the red flags o ser.
Building your future around someone you have known for 5 months.
Applying to the same schools.- limiting options

Living together - sharing expenses thankfully it's only an apartment.

Lots of room for staying together due to inertia and not because it's the right thing for both of them. This also applies to residency applications

Also highly likely that if things don't go as planned one completely crashes and falls apart.

These aren’t red flags. If you are choosing to marry someone, you are building a life with that person. If things like sharing expenses and feeling tied to someone else aren’t your thing, don’t get engaged or married. But for someone who does want those things, like OP’s child, this are exactly the steps you take to start sharing your life permanently with another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Say that you are happy for them! I would be proud to have raised such responsible, young adults who aren't living an extended adolescence. They sound like mature and capable individuals.

They haven’t accomplished anything (except med school).

Med school isn't an accomplishment. They will have done something when they graduate

Found the communications major.

Found the doctor’s wife!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying young is a great way to build wealth.

Or drown in poverty

Why? You can’t deny that life is easier on a dual income than single income.

Yes but how many women who marry very young continue to work? Typically they don't have established careers and can't handle the cost of childcare at that point.

My sister got married in her early twenties and worked in finance supporting her husband through med school. She is super successful two decades later as is her husband.

There’s a difference between college/grad school educated women who marry young and people without these degrees.

I would not advise any young woman today to work and support her boyfriend/ husband and though school.
Too many instances of the woman being left after school is done and she invested her money and time for nothing.

And no there really isn't a difference for women. Only those who have had parents pay for college may avoid a financial hit

She wasn’t paying for his med school. But she was earning money while he was in school and when they started a family and he was early in his internship and residency. Medicine is a long road and unless you want to be living on a residents salary, I’m not sure how you suggest these families get by without the woman working.

Would you say the same thing about warning against a man supporting his family while his wife went to med school and completed her residency?

Yes some people divorce after any number of years of marriage. Doctors included. It seems pessimistic to go into life assuming that someone is only looking for financial support throughout those years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Say that you are happy for them! I would be proud to have raised such responsible, young adults who aren't living an extended adolescence. They sound like mature and capable individuals.

They haven’t accomplished anything (except med school).

Med school isn't an accomplishment. They will have done something when they graduate

Found the communications major.

Found the woman who has accomplished nothing in her life and lives through her spouse/ kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Marrying young is a great way to build wealth.

Or drown in poverty

Why? You can’t deny that life is easier on a dual income than single income.

Yes but how many women who marry very young continue to work? Typically they don't have established careers and can't handle the cost of childcare at that point.

My sister got married in her early twenties and worked in finance supporting her husband through med school. She is super successful two decades later as is her husband.

There’s a difference between college/grad school educated women who marry young and people without these degrees.

I would not advise any young woman today to work and support her boyfriend/ husband and though school.
Too many instances of the woman being left after school is done and she invested her money and time for nothing.

And no there really isn't a difference for women. Only those who have had parents pay for college may avoid a financial hit

She wasn’t paying for his med school. But she was earning money while he was in school and when they started a family and he was early in his internship and residency. Medicine is a long road and unless you want to be living on a residents salary, I’m not sure how you suggest these families get by without the woman working.

Would you say the same thing about warning against a man supporting his family while his wife went to med school and completed her residency?

Yes some people divorce after any number of years of marriage. Doctors included. It seems pessimistic to go into life assuming that someone is only looking for financial support throughout those years.

I would not advise anyone to get into a situation where they are paying for partner is spouse to go to med school.
Glad it worked out for your sister( can't say for sure because you're so reporting and not her), but I have seen absolute disasters happen in the scenario you describe.
In the year 2023 it's not good advice to tell someone to build together particularly young woman just to say they married at 26