Question for older men who date much younger women

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

Perhaps they should not be allowed to vote then.

Or drink, or have jobs, or go out in public without a responsible adult as their protector / duenna.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

Perhaps they should not be allowed to vote then.

Perhaps they should be allowed to mature with people their own age range instead of predators 25 years older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

If they are adult enough to have sex with someone their own age, they are adult enough to have sex with someone older. You're just making up completely illogical reasons that it's "wrong" because you don't like it.

Clearly they don’t think it’s great either or they wouldn’t keep dumping him. They can live and learn but I think he’s a loser.

[Anonymous]

The only young women who date older men and ones that get someone their own age. Congratulations! You’re their second choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

Perhaps they should not be allowed to vote then.

Or drink, or have jobs, or go out in public without a responsible adult as their protector / duenna.

Actually he is literally talking about people who aren’t old enough to drink or graduate from college. You want your collegesged daughter sleeping with a 45 year old promiscuous slime who gives her an STD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Recently I was going through boxes and came across things I'd written in my early 20s. I've lived more than half my life since then. My voice was mature and exactly the same as it is now. I was surprised. In some ways I'm wiser now because I've raised children.

In my early 20s I did date someone who was 15 years older. Now I'm open to dating people much younger.

Even 15 years is a lot for a 20-22yo woman. We are talking here about 25 years at that age. It’s not cool at all, it’s barely legal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

I have been told many times when dating younger women that I treat them in a much kinder and less condescending way than the average guy their own age they’ve dated. I have a strong moral code in how I treat everyone and in a dozen years when my daughter is out of college and starting her first job, if she dates, I hope it is someone who is kind and considerate as well.

Yeah I remember when I became older than the women my friend’s single dad had always dated. Guess what, he was super courteous never committed to any of them they always dumped him and he is still alone. With time I’ve come to see him very differently than I did as a teenager and post-adolescent young woman.

PS his daughter is totally messed up, divorced and single with an eating disorder and stunted personality now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

If you have daughters, as I do, you realize that once they reach a certain age, you can no longer control what they do. Either you raised them to make good choices, or you didn't, but at that point it's totally up to them. I would say that point is definitely no later than when they go off to college, and realistically there isn't much you can do to limit their choices when they're juniors and seniors in high school. They are going to have sex with who they want to have sex with, regardless of what you think about it, that's just a fact.

As a thought experiment, let's say a woman in her 20s came into DCUM relationships and said, "my dad insists he should have the power to approve who I have sex with, and I am absolutely not allowed to have sex with a man if he's not okay with it." What do you think the DCUM reaction would be? I think DCUM would howl, "ewww, creepy and controlling, get away from this crazy patriarch as fast as you can!" Would you, as a father, want to have this power if you could (which you can't)?

Lots of people do totally legal things that I don't approve of. But that's freedom. You can't stop adult women from sleeping with "unsuitable" men unless you deprive them of freedom. And that's not gonna happen so you might as well not sit around being mad about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

If they are adult enough to have sex with someone their own age, they are adult enough to have sex with someone older. You're just making up completely illogical reasons that it's "wrong" because you don't like it.

Clearly they don’t think it’s great either or they wouldn’t keep dumping him. They can live and learn but I think he’s a loser.

Women break up with men for lots of reasons, even when they're dating men of roughly the same age as themselves. Since he does not intend these relationships to be permanent, he does not "lose" when they end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

Perhaps they should not be allowed to vote then.

Or drink, or have jobs, or go out in public without a responsible adult as their protector / duenna.

Actually he is literally talking about people who aren’t old enough to drink or graduate from college. You want your collegesged daughter sleeping with a 45 year old promiscuous slime who gives her an STD?

He is literally talking about "very young women in their EARLY 20s". They may be old enough to drink - but it hardly matters because we all know they ARE drinking anyway.

When my daughter goes to college, I will have ZERO control over who she sleeps with. She will do whatever she wants. There is no point in me even thinking about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My gf is much younger than me (she is just under half of my age). She isn't needy and doesn't care a bit about money. Yes, we go on public dates and travel together. My friends know about her and at some point my family will too but I have always been silent with my family about my dating life. We are on each other's social media so people who look for me (or her) can see what we are up to. We are in a long-term relationship; she doesn't want to get married to anyone and doesn't want children. We talk for 2 to 4 hours a day every day about many different things. She is smart, much smarter than most of the women I have dated who were closer to my age.

People who don't care a bit about money but have enough to date and travel. I think they care a little bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

I have been told many times when dating younger women that I treat them in a much kinder and less condescending way than the average guy their own age they’ve dated. I have a strong moral code in how I treat everyone and in a dozen years when my daughter is out of college and starting her first job, if she dates, I hope it is someone who is kind and considerate as well.

Yeah I remember when I became older than the women my friend’s single dad had always dated. Guess what, he was super courteous never committed to any of them they always dumped him and he is still alone. With time I’ve come to see him very differently than I did as a teenager and post-adolescent young woman.

PS his daughter is totally messed up, divorced and single with an eating disorder and stunted personality now.

Well, he's divorced, and in my experience daughter's of divorced parents are usually messed up by the mother. She has more time, and more control, over the child and some moms use that time and control to warp their kids. After all, there is a reason the mom is divorced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

Perhaps they should not be allowed to vote then.

Or drink, or have jobs, or go out in public without a responsible adult as their protector / duenna.

Actually he is literally talking about people who aren’t old enough to drink or graduate from college. You want your collegesged daughter sleeping with a 45 year old promiscuous slime who gives her an STD?

I'm really enjoying your personal attacks, based on a strawman you constructed, Karen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

Perhaps they should not be allowed to vote then.

Perhaps they should be allowed to mature with people their own age range instead of predators 25 years older.

Yes, no one older should be allowed to influence a young woman. No teachers, professors, co-workers, bosses, ministers, commanding officers, parents or relatives.

It's only in the last 150 or so years that people began to be segregated by age, driven by schooling. It's new and not terribly natural.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men are hard wired to want women in their early 20's. It's just biology. I date younger women because I want them and I can get them, don't care if that pisses off the feminists.

Do you have daughters?

I find it hard to believe men who have daughters and thus realize how very young women in their EARLY 20s really are would feel okay with this.

And I am a man. My colleague, who was in his late 40’s, started up an affair with a 20 year old. I could never look at him the same way; it’s completely predatory. But he doesn’t have daughters, and I think that might be why he could wrap his mind around it

This. They are mostly not really adults on the inside no matter what the outside look like. They may be intellectually precocious but emotionally are usually very young still.

So you are saying that my 24 year old gf, who graduated from college when she was 20, who is getting a PhD in a STEM field and who a university trusts to work in a $20 million lab, and do experiments on humans, is not mature enough to date me?