And the woman of my dreams just ruined it

[Anonymous]

I’ve known of her for a long time. Honestly, have had a crush on her from afar for about 10 years but she never looked my way until now. She’s funny, smart, gorgeous, kind, has a great job, etc. Im pretty laid back but I told her I have I can’t stand it when a woman is naively friendly. She asked what constitutes as being as naively friendly because sometimes women have to do it to avoid being shot. I said if you are consciously sensing danger to the point you are worried about being shot then you aren’t being naively friendly. Naively friendly would be the opposite of that. Not sensing intentions or danger.

Then she said, I guess I should’ve specified that because we’re always on alert it can be unconscious, with or without present danger because we’ve been conditioned. Now flirting or not having boundaries with someone you have a platonic or business relationship with? That’s an absolute no…that’s why I asked what you view as friendly.

So clearly she’s a flirt, so that’s just ruined how I view her now. Sucks because I really liked her.

[Anonymous]

What are you talking about? What is naively friendly?

It sounds like you have an unrequited crush on her, then she was friendly to you, and you misconstrued it as a romantic interest, and now you are upset with her because of that, and blame her for your misinterpretation of her behavior.

[Anonymous]

You sound insane and now she knows that about you, so good for her.

[Anonymous]

If you're referring to someone you've never gone out with as the woman of your dreams, and you're older than 15, something is very wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're referring to someone you've never gone out with as the woman of your dreams, and you're older than 15, something is very wrong.

We’ve done out a handful of times and have/had a date set up for this weekend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're referring to someone you've never gone out with as the woman of your dreams, and you're older than 15, something is very wrong.

We’ve done out a handful of times and have/had a date set up for this weekend.

When you were pretending to be her friend for 10 years in hopes she'd you go out with you, you hadn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're referring to someone you've never gone out with as the woman of your dreams, and you're older than 15, something is very wrong.

We’ve done out a handful of times and have/had a date set up for this weekend.

I’ve known her for 10 years, that doesn’t mean I was friends with her.

[Anonymous]

She didn’t ruin anything. She’s a real human, not the imaginary woman of your dreams.

[Anonymous]

Yea, I dated a guy like you. Would go on long rants about how I should make sure every interaction with a male coworker was 100% professional, couldn’t chit chat or ask how their weekend was or eat lunch with them. If a man tried to chit chat with me while I waited for my coffee at Starbucks I was to completely ignore him or give one word, terse answers.

Dude turned out to be a complete psycho. Six months in, he started calling me up screaming about how I dated men *before we had even met*.

Any man who thinks a woman having a friendly interaction with a man means he’s trying to sleep with her and she’s actively flirting back is massively insecure and should not be dating. Sounds like she dodged a bullet.

[Anonymous]

Did her mom just die? I’m 99% sure this is the same guy who posted that he finally went out with the woman of his dreams who he’s known 10 years and he thought her mentioning her mom passing away 3 weeks ago was a red flag.

[Anonymous]

Dude just go to the gym more.

[Anonymous]

She should run far away from you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She should run far away from you.

Why? What’s wrong with my reservations?

[Anonymous]

Troll.

[Anonymous]

So you don’t think a woman can just . . . be friendly? There’s something wrong with that?