Was accidentally on a group text...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Just got a bunch of side texts from a few other moms horrified and apologizing.
I have yet to chime into the group thread (nobody has).
Letting it sit for a few.

They are horrified they got caught. Not that it happened.

[Anonymous]

I’m the PP with the response of “I know Y can be a handful... thanks for including him...” and I am astounded at all the horrible advice most people are giving OP. None of you must have any functional, long lasting friendships with people who have character and occasionally make mistakes. I have lost my share of friends too, but at 38 I hope that I have found a way to identify and maintain good relationships with other women. Goodness knows I need these friendships (and group texts) more than ever during this pandemic!

[Anonymous]

In typical DCUM fashion, so many people were quick to basically accuse OP of being a crappy parent. As the parent of a sweet but intense and loud ADHD kid, this is my biggest fear. People have no idea how far you've come and how many years you've put into parenting strategies, therapies, etc., and sometimes they're just not a silver bullet. Parents of NT kids will never understand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is nice that they are including your child. He must be a nightmare. Be glad you have friends and laugh it off.

Most young boys are nightmares.

As the mom of two boys, and a friend of people who have anywhere from 1-4 sons, this isn’t true. There is always an outlier or two in the group.

We are really good friends with the parents with of two boys who are outliers, and the older the kids get, people are really just less tolerant of the behavior. OP is your son neurotypical?

Kids are a nightmare who have SN/mental health or poor parenting. SN can be excusable with good parenting/parent trying but not poor parenting. We've had kids come over where the kids let them run wild and they don't understand they can behave that way at home but not in my home.

Thanks for "excusing" a child's chemically- and/or genetically-based behavior, Your Majesty.

[Anonymous]

What's the problem here? You ADMITTED your kid can be hyper and loud. You don't control it, so others deal with his loudness by taking Advil when your son gives them a headache. Would you rather they step in and parent your child for you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's the problem here? You ADMITTED your kid can be hyper and loud. You don't control it, so others deal with his loudness by taking Advil when your son gives them a headache. Would you rather they step in and parent your child for you?

You don't know what she does or doesn't control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m the PP with the response of “I know Y can be a handful... thanks for including him...” and I am astounded at all the horrible advice most people are giving OP. None of you must have any functional, long lasting friendships with people who have character and occasionally make mistakes. I have lost my share of friends too, but at 38 I hope that I have found a way to identify and maintain good relationships with other women. Goodness knows I need these friendships (and group texts) more than ever during this pandemic!

These are not OP’s lifelong best friends. They are mom acquaintances from a playgroup. And they’re talking shit about OP’s kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Just got a bunch of side texts from a few other moms horrified and apologizing.
I have yet to chime into the group thread (nobody has).
Letting it sit for a few.

They are horrified they got caught. Not that it happened.

Nope. Just 1 crazy lady.

[Anonymous]

We had that one kid too and we loved the mom. And the kid too but still. We also would never call him out like that on a text. Ever. That is poor form. That mom is an idiot.

I would reply back "I don't think Advil should be combined with wine, but I am happy to bring a bottle of red. See you guys soon!"

[Anonymous]

I just want to say to the OP that I’m really sorry this happened to you. It’s really hurtful and I’m not sure how I would respond. I commend you for just sitting on it for a bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's the problem here? You ADMITTED your kid can be hyper and loud. You don't control it, so others deal with his loudness by taking Advil when your son gives them a headache. Would you rather they step in and parent your child for you?

You really need to go drink wine and take some Advil and let the normal people take it from here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had that one kid too and we loved the mom. And the kid too but still. We also would never call him out like that on a text. Ever. That is poor form. That mom is an idiot.

I would reply back "I don't think Advil should be combined with wine, but I am happy to bring a bottle of red. See you guys soon!"

I think you are missing the whole point that it’s not the kid that is the problem just 1 crazy mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had that one kid too and we loved the mom. And the kid too but still. We also would never call him out like that on a text. Ever. That is poor form. That mom is an idiot.

I would reply back "I don't think Advil should be combined with wine, but I am happy to bring a bottle of red. See you guys soon!"

I think you are missing the whole point that it’s not the kid that is the problem just 1 crazy mom.

I get that 100%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just want to say to the OP that I’m really sorry this happened to you. It’s really hurtful and I’m not sure how I would respond. I commend you for just sitting on it for a bit.

+1. I probably would have replied by saying something along the lines of “no need. We will come with our own bottles to share! 😉”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We had that one kid too and we loved the mom. And the kid too but still. We also would never call him out like that on a text. Ever. That is poor form. That mom is an idiot.

I would reply back "I don't think Advil should be combined with wine, but I am happy to bring a bottle of red. See you guys soon!"

I think you are missing the whole point that it’s not the kid that is the problem just 1 crazy mom.

I get that 100%.

+1. De-escalate, be the bigger person so the group doesn’t feel awkward and you decide if you want to have a sidebar discussion later with the person who called you out. Open the door for discussion. That is what friends do. “Friends” make it dramatic and don’t necessarily address a true problem. If you care about someone use the eagle SNAFU to lay a yellow brick down.