Annoying Girl Scout Family--what to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought Girl Scouts was supposed to be welcoming and inclusive. It's very obvious when you're being excluded and that's a jerky thing for the leaders to do to impressionable young children and parents who are struggling with other issues.

OP was welcoming and inclusive. In return she got perpetually crapped on. Her obligation was fulfilled - time for her to move in without Susie and her family.

No, she was clear she doesn't want the daughter or mom. Dad is trying and its not good enough. Dad can get his own hotel room or tent. Simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Below are quotes clipped from this string, with any minor child's name deleted. GSUSA volunteers certainly kick back and enjoying themselves at these glamping parties. At least my cookie contributions are upgrading the mental health of these over-tasked folks! Are all of these weekend trips this enjoyable?

She was not the only one who drank on that trip (I did not and I am a pretty regular drinker...but I just follow that rule very strictly for GS trips). A group of moms went and bought wine from the hotel lobby and drank it. Most of the moms didn't have more than a glass but I think (deleted minor girl’s name)'s mom had been drinking her own supply all evening or is a total lightweight.

We did another trip about a year later and I told all of the moms not to drink ((deleted minor girl’s name)'s mom was not on that trip, nor was (deleted minor girl’s name)). I know at least one other mom snuck in a bottle of wine. Against the rules but as long as nobody is impaired I'm not going to get tooooo upset about it. I will just remind everyone again...

The very first GS event we had (a simple overnight at a hotel with a pool), I honestly didn't know the rules and neither did anyone else and we all brought wine. But again, we didn't over consume it. Like 2 glasses over the entire course of the evening. Then I ended up doing the camping training and indoor/outdoor overnight training and I found out it was against the rules but I think these moms like each other so much it feels like a social opportunity to them as well. So the two other trips we've taken they drank (I did not) but only (deleted minor girl’s name)'s mom was out of control. I will continue to remind them not to drink on GS trips but I'm honestly not going to go crazy enforcing it if nobody is driving and I can't tell they've been drinking. It's weird though because at our school's overnight camp there's a no drinking rule and as far as I can tell nobody breaks that one.

And I should mention the time (deleted minor girl’s name)'s mom got so drunk I had no idea they were even drinking. I was down the hall in a different room with another chaperone and 3 girls and we were sleeping!! I just heard stories from other moms the next day.

They are the parents I've got for the troop I've got. I've asked them not to drink and it seems like some of them don't want to adhere to that on overnight trips but short of a major confrontation about this I don't know how to force them to stop.

You can't police adults every second if they're inside hotel rooms, nor should you, of course! At some point if they're going to break the rule, they're going to break it, but that doesn't mean you should soft-pedal telling them in advance that it does apply to them. I get a sense here of moms who maybe have gotten a bit used to thinking of GS overnight events as chances to catch up--which they are, but with rules attached.

Man, if ever a situation warranted drinking, it’s chaperoning a bunch of Girl Scouts.

I pretty much chug a big glass of wine after each meeting. We are planning a camping trip this summer and everyone in the troop will be invited but it won't be an official GS trip (not using troop funds,etc.) so if parents want to have a beer by the campfire...so be it.

Maybe drinking wine would make them less annoying.

And yet at our outings/camp outs half the moms are drinking 'tea' from an insulated cup at 9pm....

By “their” room does that mean drunk (deleted minor girl’s name)’s mom was sharing a room with (deleted minor girl’s name)? Or with the other parents who had gone drinking? The latter is more forgivable than the former I think.

She was in a room with (deleted minor girl’s name) and another hot mess mom who was only in the troop a year and the 2 girls (and the dog). Other hot mess mom was crazy but she apparently didn’t drink much.

I'm a boy scout mom and I am disgusted by this. My kids are eagle scouts and grown now and I never saw a parent drink while being a chaperone on any trip or outing. It wouldn't be tolerated and the leaders would SPEAK UP.

You really need to stop turning a blind eye to parent chaperones drinking on trips. That's NOT ok. It's even worse to have a "if I don't see if but you're not drunk its fine" unofficial policy. It needs to be a dry weekend, with a parent HH at the end of it (after all girls are home) if they really need an excuse to drink together.

I don’t think the moms having one glass of wine are the issue here. Although they should knock that off.

Why would you post all of this? You sound drunk with the rambling. You don't want mom as she violated the rules. Ok. Dad is offering if its his custody time and he can simply pay extra for him and daughter to have a room separately and how hard is it for him later to add his own room as its not like you have to do anything if you book your rooms and he books his.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought Girl Scouts was supposed to be welcoming and inclusive. It's very obvious when you're being excluded and that's a jerky thing for the leaders to do to impressionable young children and parents who are struggling with other issues.

OP was welcoming and inclusive. In return she got perpetually crapped on. Her obligation was fulfilled - time for her to move in without Susie and her family.

No, she was clear she doesn't want the daughter or mom. Dad is trying and its not good enough. Dad can get his own hotel room or tent. Simple.

Sorry. I still disagree. There’s only so much crap one can take. OP reached her limit (I would have too) and her work is done. She owes no one anything at this point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I thought Girl Scouts was supposed to be welcoming and inclusive. It's very obvious when you're being excluded and that's a jerky thing for the leaders to do to impressionable young children and parents who are struggling with other issues.

OP was welcoming and inclusive. In return she got perpetually crapped on. Her obligation was fulfilled - time for her to move in without Susie and her family.

No, she was clear she doesn't want the daughter or mom. Dad is trying and its not good enough. Dad can get his own hotel room or tent. Simple.

No, Dad said they were still working on the summer schedule. OP has a deadline so she has to move along.

[Anonymous]

I'm the OP and haven't looked at this thread or posted in several days due to travel for work. Seems like some things other people said were attributed to me which I guess I don't really care about but I didn't say some of the things attributed to me.

I definitely have complained about this child and family partly out of venting and frustration but I also genuinely wanted a gut check. As the thread went on I felt like I needed to defend myself and added more details. Her name isn't really Suzie (duh). I have tried to include them, I have tried to be kind, I have tried to be understanding, and I have tried to be accommodating. I am at the end of my rope with it and have taken the advice given by the majority here and am moving on from chasing this family for RSVPs.

I did contact council to give them a heads up and I let the dad know that we couldn't accommodate a male chaperone on this trip (we are staying in a cabin, not hotel, and do not have capability for separate sleeping quarters for a male chaperone). They are going to follow up with me with some advice moving forward with this family. For now she is not coming on the trip.

I plan to have a parent meeting and reiterate the rules of chaperoning. As we are sleeping in a shared space, unless someone decides to sneak wine in the bathroom, I think that sobriety will not be an issue.

Thanks for the solid advice and the crazy judgment. It was helpful and entertaining, respectively.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP and haven't looked at this thread or posted in several days due to travel for work. Seems like some things other people said were attributed to me which I guess I don't really care about but I didn't say some of the things attributed to me.

I definitely have complained about this child and family partly out of venting and frustration but I also genuinely wanted a gut check. As the thread went on I felt like I needed to defend myself and added more details. Her name isn't really Suzie (duh). I have tried to include them, I have tried to be kind, I have tried to be understanding, and I have tried to be accommodating. I am at the end of my rope with it and have taken the advice given by the majority here and am moving on from chasing this family for RSVPs.

I did contact council to give them a heads up and I let the dad know that we couldn't accommodate a male chaperone on this trip (we are staying in a cabin, not hotel, and do not have capability for separate sleeping quarters for a male chaperone). They are going to follow up with me with some advice moving forward with this family. For now she is not coming on the trip.

I plan to have a parent meeting and reiterate the rules of chaperoning. As we are sleeping in a shared space, unless someone decides to sneak wine in the bathroom, I think that sobriety will not be an issue.

Thanks for the solid advice and the crazy judgment. It was helpful and entertaining, respectively.

Why can't he get a separate cabin or sleep in a tent? Ok, we don't get you don't like mom but don't punish the child because of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP and haven't looked at this thread or posted in several days due to travel for work. Seems like some things other people said were attributed to me which I guess I don't really care about but I didn't say some of the things attributed to me.

I definitely have complained about this child and family partly out of venting and frustration but I also genuinely wanted a gut check. As the thread went on I felt like I needed to defend myself and added more details. Her name isn't really Suzie (duh). I have tried to include them, I have tried to be kind, I have tried to be understanding, and I have tried to be accommodating. I am at the end of my rope with it and have taken the advice given by the majority here and am moving on from chasing this family for RSVPs.

I did contact council to give them a heads up and I let the dad know that we couldn't accommodate a male chaperone on this trip (we are staying in a cabin, not hotel, and do not have capability for separate sleeping quarters for a male chaperone). They are going to follow up with me with some advice moving forward with this family. For now she is not coming on the trip.

I plan to have a parent meeting and reiterate the rules of chaperoning. As we are sleeping in a shared space, unless someone decides to sneak wine in the bathroom, I think that sobriety will not be an issue.

Thanks for the solid advice and the crazy judgment. It was helpful and entertaining, respectively.

Why can't he get a separate cabin or sleep in a tent? Ok, we don't get you don't like mom but don't punish the child because of that.

Why should the OP punish herself with dealing with this obnoxious kid?

One reason my DD dropped GS and why I stopped being a leader was the over the top of being over inclusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP and haven't looked at this thread or posted in several days due to travel for work. Seems like some things other people said were attributed to me which I guess I don't really care about but I didn't say some of the things attributed to me.

I definitely have complained about this child and family partly out of venting and frustration but I also genuinely wanted a gut check. As the thread went on I felt like I needed to defend myself and added more details. Her name isn't really Suzie (duh). I have tried to include them, I have tried to be kind, I have tried to be understanding, and I have tried to be accommodating. I am at the end of my rope with it and have taken the advice given by the majority here and am moving on from chasing this family for RSVPs.

I did contact council to give them a heads up and I let the dad know that we couldn't accommodate a male chaperone on this trip (we are staying in a cabin, not hotel, and do not have capability for separate sleeping quarters for a male chaperone). They are going to follow up with me with some advice moving forward with this family. For now she is not coming on the trip.

I plan to have a parent meeting and reiterate the rules of chaperoning. As we are sleeping in a shared space, unless someone decides to sneak wine in the bathroom, I think that sobriety will not be an issue.

Thanks for the solid advice and the crazy judgment. It was helpful and entertaining, respectively.

Why can't he get a separate cabin or sleep in a tent? Ok, we don't get you don't like mom but don't punish the child because of that.

Solid advice when you know nothing about where/when/how they are renting