SAHMs: Stop complaining to me about how busy you are

[Anonymous]

I'm a SAHM mom. I made the decision to quit working because, quite frankly, I could not handle the demands of being a good employee, good mother, and good wife all at once. It was literally breaking me until I just up and quit.

I have a very good life now. I spend my time and energy on my children and husband and myself. But I did have to reorient myself that my role in the family is to be the support system. DH works tons, even more now than before, in order to make up for the money we don't have from my income. But net-net, I would not describe my life as busy. I do stuff, but it's nothing like it was when I was working when DD was a baby.

[Anonymous]

I was a WOHM for over 25 years. At the tail end I mostly WAHM and went to the office 1-2 times a week. I currently have adult, elementary, and middle school age children. I finally quit, but I still do very part time on an as need basis for a company. Although there was quite a lot of relief on my stress level, my main priorities have shifted and thus I find I’m still as busy as I was when I was a WOHM! I’m focusing on all the things that I used my fulltime job as excuses to myself on why it was acceptable to neglect them (e.g. disorganized life, neglected house, kid’s grades). I have no excuse now. I have so many projects I’m currently tackling and I’m more engaged with my kid’s education. I’m just as busy as before, but I’m calmer and have more meaning priorities for my family.

[Anonymous]

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[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, once kids are in school, SAHMs are not as busy as working moms.

You don’t know that though. I’m a working mom and because I work my DH splits a lot of housework with me. We can also afford to outsource things like house cleaning, grocery delivery, yard work, etc.

A SAHM may feel like it is her “job” to handle the bulk of the house stuff and kid emergencies, especially if her spouse works long hours or travels. You don’t know if they have an ailing parent to take care of, etc.

Stop making generalizations, it isn’t a contest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

SAHMs calling others freeloaders. The ultimate irony.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 school age kids. I'm recovering from years I had little ones at home.

I exercise, read, clean (all of it, decluttering, deep clean, laundry, etc), shop, take care of family errands, walk the dog, go to physical therapy 3x a week for scoliosis, volunteer at the school and community level, check in on aging parents, cook daily. I put some time into personal maintenance during the week, i.e. nails/hair, facials.

Earliest kid is done by 2 pm, so after that I drive a lot to and from after school activities, dinner, debrief the day with the kids, homework, etc.

Some days I'm very productive and some days I feel bored/unmotivated but I had those days when I WOHM too.

I do all of this (minus the exercise nails and facials, physical therapy) AND work full time.

Good for you, congrats.

Thanks, now please stop complaining that you are busy.

I am busy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

SAHMs calling others freeloaders. The ultimate irony.

I don’t agree, but...snerk! Ooooohhh...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think SAHMs don’t have as helpful of husbands as working women so they have to make up for it. Leading them to be busier. I’m shocked at what my sahm friends let their husbands get away with. One man hadn’t ever changed a diaper, another hadn’t ever read a book to his kid ever.

Yes I had a sahm friend gushing over her husband for taking care of the kids for three days when she was sick. I’m like, he’s a parent, and????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

SAHMs calling others freeloaders. The ultimate irony.

I'm not a SAHM. I work outside of of the home. I take time off now and then to chip in and help in my kids' activities

[Anonymous]

It doesn't matter what the SAHM is doing. It's her time and she can spend it the way that she sees fit.

When you retire are you going to feel compelled to constantly explain what you are doing with yourself all day long? Are you going to constantly feel the need to explain why you can't do XYZ for somebody else? Or are you going to plan your own day and do what you feel needs to be accomplished on any given day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

SAHMs calling others freeloaders. The ultimate irony.

I'm not a SAHM. I work outside of of the home. I take time off now and then to chip in and help in my kids' activities

You never know who all is volunteering to go on field trips or help out. There are only so many volunteers needed and if 10 people offer to volunteer but there are only 3 spots to fill, then 7 of those people are not going to be selected to volunteer. It doesn't mean that they never offer to help out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

SAHMs calling others freeloaders. The ultimate irony.

I'm not a SAHM. I work outside of of the home. I take time off now and then to chip in and help in my kids' activities

....btw, my husband also takes time now and then to help out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

SAHMs calling others freeloaders. The ultimate irony.

I'm not a SAHM. I work outside of of the home. I take time off now and then to chip in and help in my kids' activities

You never know who all is volunteering to go on field trips or help out. There are only so many volunteers needed and if 10 people offer to volunteer but there are only 3 spots to fill, then 7 of those people are not going to be selected to volunteer. It doesn't mean that they never offer to help out.

I'm not talking about the fun desirable events that happen once a year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh look. Another whiny WOHM.

OP, you can't handle working and parenting then quit.

Oh I can handle it fine. I just can't handle listening to SAHMs who have school aged kids complain they are busy. Especially when it's to get out of helping out on things like school functions or girl scout activities.

There it is!!! You’re mad because the SAHMs aren’t providing as much free labor as you would like them to.

Guess what? Nobody owes you free labor regardless of work status. Grow up OP. Read some threads about how so many people hate school functions and room parents make insane demands for class parties, don’t even get me started on the PTA...

Hahahaha free labor?? You are a free LOADER if your child participates in any school activities, field trips, lunch program, carline, after school enrichment like scouts or sports, if you never help out in any way. All of these activities require volunteers to make it happen. I think perhaps you are the one who needs to grow up for the sake of your children. Sad that your child never has your participation in these things yet benefits from them.

SAHMs calling others freeloaders. The ultimate irony.

I'm not a SAHM. I work outside of of the home. I take time off now and then to chip in and help in my kids' activities

You never know who all is volunteering to go on field trips or help out. There are only so many volunteers needed and if 10 people offer to volunteer but there are only 3 spots to fill, then 7 of those people are not going to be selected to volunteer. It doesn't mean that they never offer to help out.

I'm not talking about the fun desirable events that happen once a year.

If the activity requires parental participation to make it run then you should require that ALL parents help out. If volunteering is optional, then you step back and see who offers to help out.

Our swim team required a certain number of volunteer shifts from the parents of each kid. No parent was sitting on the sidelines watching all of the other parents do the work.

Most of the school activities could run w/o significant parental volunteering but the parent volunteers make the events much more successful and fun. Yes, some parents are spectators only while other parents put in the time and attention necessary to make the activity a great experience for all of the kids.