Dad's new wife wants older grandchildren to call her grandma

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your father's wife has asked the grandchildren to call her Grandma, your father has asked the grandchildren to call her Grandma Larla, and you think that the person/people whose preferences should be honored are the grandchildren? Why?

This.

You call people what they ask you to call them. If you call them something else, you are picking a fight. In this case, the kids are going out of their way to point out that the new step-grandma is not REALLY a part of their family. They're being little shits and you're letting them do it.

Oh, bullshit. Would you say the same thing if your kids were forced to call your DH's new wife "mom"? Same fucking thing, you ignorant bitch.

I agree with the substance of this but not the tone. I am divorced and if my ex's new wife insisted that our kids call her Mom, that would be wrong. When
my FIL moved a girlfriend into the house 6 weeks after MIL died and that girlfiend wanted my kids to call her Grandma, all of us were shocked - me, my then DH and our kids. Our 5 yo didn't want to call this new lady she didn't know Grandma. Not because she was mot REALLY a part of the family but because she was not BIOLOGICALLY a part of the family. That's what Grandma means - that you are the mother's mother by birth or adoption. If you're marrying into a family then you've got to use some other moniker.
- not mom, not Grandma.

It is not biology, it's relationship.
SIGH!!

[Anonymous]

Mrs. Smith is still a polite name.

Therefore, I think the kids should be free to choose it as an option if they don't feel comfortable using anything with "grandma" in the name.

If they wanted to call her by her first name, I would agree that they should be corrected. But beyond insisting on politeness, I don't think it's fair to ask a child to step outside of his or her comfort zone regarding terms of endearment.