Asked my husband for some basic things for mothers day - now he'll be spending most of the weekend with his parents

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell him to take kid with him and then you can relax on Saturday, alone!

He is taking their kid with him.

Op is upset because he will not be home to clean Saturday.and he may try to clean in Sunday instead of having family time with her

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of people that think it’s okay for DH to break the promises he previously made to his wife just because Granny is coming over is mind boggling. He’s a grown man. He made commitments to his wife that he’s now breaking. End of story. Maybe it’s because all of my grandparents died before I was 10, but the thought of a grown adult choosing to spend time with a grandparent over their own spouse and child is absurd.

Also, to everyone who keeps saying that the wife is not DH’s mom and therefore he doesn’t need to celebrate her? She doesn’t have grown children. The only way she gets celebrated is by DH doing something. What’s so hard to understand about that? Men shouldn’t become husbands if they can’t handle the reality of marriage.

Hey, drama mama, when I was growing up moms got homemade cards and maybe a poorly made breakfast in bed from their kids. It didn't require husbands rearranging their entire weekends. We overdo everything in our society these days.

When you were growing up women didn’t have the option to get a divorce. They do now. Husbands need to step it up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of people that think it’s okay for DH to break the promises he previously made to his wife just because Granny is coming over is mind boggling. He’s a grown man. He made commitments to his wife that he’s now breaking. End of story. Maybe it’s because all of my grandparents died before I was 10, but the thought of a grown adult choosing to spend time with a grandparent over their own spouse and child is absurd.

Also, to everyone who keeps saying that the wife is not DH’s mom and therefore he doesn’t need to celebrate her? She doesn’t have grown children. The only way she gets celebrated is by DH doing something. What’s so hard to understand about that? Men shouldn’t become husbands if they can’t handle the reality of marriage.

Hey, drama mama, when I was growing up moms got homemade cards and maybe a poorly made breakfast in bed from their kids. It didn't require husbands rearranging their entire weekends. We overdo everything in our society these days.

When you were growing up women didn’t have the option to get a divorce. They do now. Husbands need to step it up.

Divorce may be a better option for the husband. This OCD loser of a wife needs to step it up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Okay, you complain a lot.

She doesn't, really. And is not asking for much. The DH's parents are manipulating him and he caved. He's a big @$% baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of people that think it’s okay for DH to break the promises he previously made to his wife just because Granny is coming over is mind boggling. He’s a grown man. He made commitments to his wife that he’s now breaking. End of story. Maybe it’s because all of my grandparents died before I was 10, but the thought of a grown adult choosing to spend time with a grandparent over their own spouse and child is absurd.

Also, to everyone who keeps saying that the wife is not DH’s mom and therefore he doesn’t need to celebrate her? She doesn’t have grown children. The only way she gets celebrated is by DH doing something. What’s so hard to understand about that? Men shouldn’t become husbands if they can’t handle the reality of marriage.

Hey, drama mama, when I was growing up moms got homemade cards and maybe a poorly made breakfast in bed from their kids. It didn't require husbands rearranging their entire weekends. We overdo everything in our society these days.

Hey, douche. Growing up, my mom drank and smoked when pregnant. My parents let me ride on their laps on the front seat. And left me home along after school and summers alone . . . . Just because people used to do something a certain way doesn't mean it was the right way.

DH should have said "we already have plans." Period.

Why do these Boomer parents always have to suck all the air out of room and be the center of attention at all times?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, you complain a lot.

She doesn't, really. And is not asking for much. The DH's parents are manipulating him and he caved. He's a big @$% baby.

Exactly this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, you complain a lot.

OP here -

I just wanted to spend time with my family and feel appreciated.

You can have that on Sunday. Fellow mom here - you don’t get to claim the entire weekend. You get Sunday. Family goes out to breakfast and then you go do something you enjoy while they clean the house.

Not true. DH and I were supposed to watch my favorite show on TV last night for Mother’s Week, but he blew me off after putting the kids to bed, to meet up with an old friend in town for business. I am giving him the silent treatment.

[Anonymous]

I would LOVE a day alone. Who says you have to clean? Spend the day doing what you want to do!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of people that think it’s okay for DH to break the promises he previously made to his wife just because Granny is coming over is mind boggling. He’s a grown man. He made commitments to his wife that he’s now breaking. End of story. Maybe it’s because all of my grandparents died before I was 10, but the thought of a grown adult choosing to spend time with a grandparent over their own spouse and child is absurd.

Also, to everyone who keeps saying that the wife is not DH’s mom and therefore he doesn’t need to celebrate her? She doesn’t have grown children. The only way she gets celebrated is by DH doing something. What’s so hard to understand about that? Men shouldn’t become husbands if they can’t handle the reality of marriage.

Hey, drama mama, when I was growing up moms got homemade cards and maybe a poorly made breakfast in bed from their kids. It didn't require husbands rearranging their entire weekends. We overdo everything in our society these days.

When you were growing up women didn’t have the option to get a divorce. They do now. Husbands need to step it up.

Divorce may be a better option for the husband. This OCD loser of a wife needs to step it up.

She could find a better spouse who doesn’t spend all his free time fishing and dancing to his daddy’s tunes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:JFC. Can we just cancel Mother’s Day? Every year, the same avalanche of whining.

Mothers used to feel satisfied with a plaster handprint from their child and some overcooked eggs as part of breakfast in bed.

Now nagging the DH into submission to clean the house to perfection while he ignores his own mother is part of the deal, apparently.

His mother clearly has a husband who is able to do her bidding. He can celebrate her

No. She is not her husband’s mother. She is her son’s mother and he will be celebrating her. Simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think we have a good idea why the DH likes to "go fishing" every weekend.

+1. I’m a woman who thinks fishing is gross and I’d still rather do that every Saturday than spend the bulk of the day doing a “deep clean.” Sounds unbelievably neurotic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:JFC. Can we just cancel Mother’s Day? Every year, the same avalanche of whining.

The expected dcum response. You are a jerk with no reading comprehension skills.

Nope. Your misplaced outrage is noted and given the level of consideration it deserves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a martyr-mom who talks about how for Mother’s Day she only asked for 3 kid-free hours but didn’t get it. So even if this particular post is fake, there are actually people like the OP. They won’t hire cleaners or babysitters because of control issues.

Such misogyny. Moms who don't get time to themselves or have a spouse who flakes on their responsibilities have a valid complaint. Many women deal with issue and we all know it. Some people don't have babysitters and can't afford cleaners. This is so hateful to women who don't have all the supports some of you have.

The term martyr-mom is hateful and shows your bias.

Yawwwwwn

(not the quoted PP)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, you complain a lot.

OP here -

I just wanted to spend time with my family and feel appreciated.

I’m one of the people that thinks the “must deep clean every Saturday” thing is nonsense. But I do think there are some totally legitimate concerns to discuss with her husband.

First, why is it ok for him to go fishing three saturdays in a row? Is he being a jerk? Is OP being a martyr? Does OP actually get plenty of time for herself?

Second, are OP’s cleaning standards ok with husband? Does he think she is over the top on this? Is husband actually a horrific slob which leads to this need to clean?

Third, don’t freaking ask what I want for a holiday and then go do something else!!’ Honestly, that is so jerky. But again, I cannot tell if OP is a martyr that doesn’t say “sorry, that doesn’t work for us this weekend.”

Fourth, is “grandma’s last X” really going to be the standard that determines all holiday plans? That would not be ok with me at all. I definitely think you prioritize time with people that you love that are nearing end of life, but I’m not sacrificing everything for this.

There is a ton here for discussion between OP and husband.

He didn’t. “The holiday” is SUNDAY.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Instead of canceling mother's day, I would like it split. Saturday can be mothers of adult children and Sunday can be mothers of young children day.

And JFC you think older moms would be so darn thrilled to get some grandkids that they'd be willing to hand over the keys to mother's day! Don't they see how many older women never get grandchildren these days?!

That is exactly what OP’s husband is doing. Can you not read? FFS.