Missing Nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

That’s the opinions of just a couple of trolls. They haunt this forum like no other. We’ve heard from enough nannies who are fine with a call from their charges.

These trolls always attack the OP if she’s the employer of a nanny. They just parrot the same nonsense with their poor grammar and pathetic attempts at insulting other posters.

I would hate to work for you. You must live on a plantation 100 years back in time.

Stop, sweetie. You’re humiliating yourself.

No, honey. You’re arrogance and sense of entitlement is showing.

Your arrogance, dear, not you’re arrogance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I clicked on this thread because I thought the nanny had gone missing. This is much less exciting.

Help your kid write postcards to the nanny. It will be fine.

+1. I was expecting a caper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

Well said. My charge is just three - he can call me whenever he wants. I love him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

That’s the opinions of just a couple of trolls. They haunt this forum like no other. We’ve heard from enough nannies who are fine with a call from their charges.

These trolls always attack the OP if she’s the employer of a nanny. They just parrot the same nonsense with their poor grammar and pathetic attempts at insulting other posters.

I would hate to work for you. You must live on a plantation 100 years back in time.

Stop, sweetie. You’re humiliating yourself.

No, honey. You’re arrogance and sense of entitlement is showing.

Your arrogance, dear, not you’re arrogance.

Your arrogance and entitlement, sweetie is into the ether.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

Well said. My charge is just three - he can call me whenever he wants. I love him.

Good, now leave other nanny’s to their privacy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

Well said. My charge is just three - he can call me whenever he wants. I love him.

Good, now leave other nanny’s to their privacy.

Who is taking away their privacy? We’re grown women who can make our own decisions. Do not dictate that I can’t or do want my charge to call me or that I’m unable or afraid to set my own boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

Well said. My charge is just three - he can call me whenever he wants. I love him.

Good, now leave other nanny’s to their privacy.

Who is taking away their privacy? We’re grown women who can make our own decisions. Do not dictate that I can’t or do want my charge to call me or that I’m unable or afraid to set my own boundaries.

Do not ask the nanny to be contacted on her time off. You need to learn about boundaries and how to respect them. The issue if the nanny minds or doesn’t mind is a moot point. And many will be agreeable because they feel they need to. No matter, it shouldn’t be asked. Get over yourself and get used to the world not revolving around you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

Well said. My charge is just three - he can call me whenever he wants. I love him.

Good, now leave other nanny’s to their privacy.

Who is taking away their privacy? We’re grown women who can make our own decisions. Do not dictate that I can’t or do want my charge to call me or that I’m unable or afraid to set my own boundaries.

Dp. Don’t be so naive. Some are afraid and unable to set boundaries and should not under no circumstance be put into that position. You are terribly pollyanish.

[Anonymous]

The OP needs to move on during this 2 week time away and stop enabling this behavior. It’s silly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

Well said. My charge is just three - he can call me whenever he wants. I love him.

Good, now leave other nanny’s to their privacy.

Who is taking away their privacy? We’re grown women who can make our own decisions. Do not dictate that I can’t or do want my charge to call me or that I’m unable or afraid to set my own boundaries.

Dp. Don’t be so naive. Some are afraid and unable to set boundaries and should not under no circumstance be put into that position. You are terribly pollyanish.

Grown women who are afraid to say no?! They shouldn’t be in charge of children.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Our nanny loves our kids and has encouraged them to call her if they want to. So far my older son has been happy just writing her a letter (we flew out yesterday). But if he wants to call her, he can.

BTW, this is not our nanny’s vacation. She’s running over to our house every other day to water the garden she and my son planted and to let our cleaning person in. But even if it were her vacation, I know she’d be fine talking to my son. I know her. She has no problem with boundaries or saying no.

So everyone can calm down!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I'm getting from many of the comments is that children need to learn and accept that their love for their nanny is not important and is actually inappropriate. The nanny is just an employee and is to be treated as such no matter how you feel about the nanny. Is that right?

What you’re missing is that no one said that the kid can’t have feelings. You need to accept that the nanny is not their endentured slave who need to make herself available during her time away from work.
Do you have time away from work? Do you want your boss to contact you whenever he/she wants and you must make yourself available?
You only care about the child’s feelings and dismiss the nanny as having no autonomy.
Do you give in to your child on everything? If your child only wants to eat ice cream, do you care more about your child’s “feelings” over better judgment?

Okay so as a number of nannies have written, they’re fine with a call or FT. Why can’t the nanny decide if she wants to take the call or not?

Do you honestly think a nanny will say she’s NOT ok with a call? “No boss, I won’t take a call from Timmy.”

If your nanny also views the relationship with the child as just a job they can't wait to have a break from as opposed to a loving and caring almost parental relationship then you might want to rethink how good your nanny actually is.

The nannies who post on DCUM seem to feel quite the opposite of that and typically say they would not mind at all having contact with the child during a break of several weeks. Most also say they stay in touch with their former charges for years after they no longer work for the family. They seem to understand that a two-yr-old and a three-yr-old, as the OP described her children, have strong feelings toward their primary caregiver and those feelings should not be dismissed as unimportant.

Well said. My charge is just three - he can call me whenever he wants. I love him.

Good, now leave other nanny’s to their privacy.

Who is taking away their privacy? We’re grown women who can make our own decisions. Do not dictate that I can’t or do want my charge to call me or that I’m unable or afraid to set my own boundaries.

Dp. Don’t be so naive. Some are afraid and unable to set boundaries and should not under no circumstance be put into that position. You are terribly pollyanish.

Grown women who are afraid to say no?! They shouldn’t be in charge of children.

Yeah, because that never happens. Suuuuurrreeee!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Our nanny loves our kids and has encouraged them to call her if they want to. So far my older son has been happy just writing her a letter (we flew out yesterday). But if he wants to call her, he can.

BTW, this is not our nanny’s vacation. She’s running over to our house every other day to water the garden she and my son planted and to let our cleaning person in. But even if it were her vacation, I know she’d be fine talking to my son. I know her. She has no problem with boundaries or saying no.

So everyone can calm down!

Ironically, you need to calm down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Our nanny loves our kids and has encouraged them to call her if they want to. So far my older son has been happy just writing her a letter (we flew out yesterday). But if he wants to call her, he can.

BTW, this is not our nanny’s vacation. She’s running over to our house every other day to water the garden she and my son planted and to let our cleaning person in. But even if it were her vacation, I know she’d be fine talking to my son. I know her. She has no problem with boundaries or saying no.

So everyone can calm down!

Ironically, you need to calm down.

I couldn’t be calmer! Loving this vacation!!