STA vs Wilson Game: Fighting and Drinking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Back to the point of accountability, MPD was called to help control the situation and escort Wilson students from the school. How did they then walk out with stolen property, vandalize cars, and smash a windshield? Where were the authorities at that point?

You think police actually pursue and solve property crimes? Bless your naive heart. This isn't a sitcom, they aren't making thousands of people in a gym empty out their pockets until the stolen items are found.

Nobody should steal, however kids should secure their things. Do they leave their doors unlocked when they leave home?

Your argument reveals that you seem to accept that steeling is normal and that " not securing your personal belongings at school is akin to leaving your front door wide open facing the street at night.

A school is a learning environment, which is one of trust and support and mutual regard.

No, my child has never in 12 years on the Cathedral Close had to "lock up his belongings" for fear that a classmate would steal his wallet, his iPhone, his blazer or his money

Not just because steeling is a crime and NOT because " no one at STA needs money" . STA gives the highest portion of FA than any school in this town and has about 40 % of students on significant FA while having many students raised in great wealth. And, yet, STA students don't steel from one another, key each other's cars and smash the property of someone who has a nicer car than them.

Why ?

Because that is dishonorable.

My son could leave his backpack - in fact this happened at BVR- overnight on the cathedral grounds and everything in it would still be there the next morning.

If Wilson doesn't have that expectation or that kind of character among its students then they should go to work on that because it is the expectation for a functioning work place, school or family.

You are lucky that your child got into private school, and that you can afford to pay.

It’s called hard work, not luck.

DP - Ha ha! Keep telling yourself that. Luck is always a part of significant success. There is a solid body of research on this.

I’m not saying that hard work isn’t necessary too. I'm just saying that many, many people work hard with only modest success. You don’t know many middle-class or lower-UMC people if you don’t know that.

No, it’s hard work and faith. Take your lucky studies elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

[Anonymous]

You started your statement by saying he was Lucknow be admitted to BVR? Maybe if he was so lucky things may have turned out a bit different....just saying I'm just a spectacular no dog in the fight.

[Anonymous]

"Luck to"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

It’s entirely the responsibility of parents to raise decent humans…..not at all the role of teachers or school administrators. We’ve encountered hordes of ill-behaved Wilson students in Tenleytown and it’s clear that it’s a failure of responsible parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

What do you need to do to see STA’s issues?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

It’s entirely the responsibility of parents to raise decent humans…..not at all the role of teachers or school administrators. We’ve encountered hordes of ill-behaved Wilson students in Tenleytown and it’s clear that it’s a failure of responsible parenting.

The ANC and Ward 3 Councilmember Cheh needs to address it. Let them bring pressure to bear on whoever is needed. Period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

You sound as though your heart is sincerely in the right place, and as a Wilson parent, I appreciate that.

To say it’s a question of irresponsible parenting, or lack of will on the part of Wilson administration, is not really on target, with all due respect. My DH and I care passionately about our student’s behavior and academic performance, and are constantly engaging with teachers and our student. Wilson admin and/or individual teachers notify us promptly if our
student steps out of line even slightly. But as my student once pointed out: “One reason that teacher X always contacts you is that s/he knows you will listen. Whereas **** (name of classmate) doesn’t even care. (Not judging ****; who knows what challenges s/he is facing.)

I honestly think what differentiates public school from private is that private schools are able to select their students, and they are able to screen for impulse control, discipline issues, and academic focus/motivation. They are also able to expel or initiate a counselIng out process, from what I understand. But at the same time, these private schools are nurturing and understanding of age-appropriate foibles. I imagine all this creates positive peer pressure.

I honestly think that if private school parents would spend a bit of time this holiday season reflecting on their great good fortune in having found an academic environment that can effectively screen out untoward behaviors, you might see Wilson differently, and thus judge with different eyes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

My niece was one of those students. My brother and sister in law smugly boasted about the [prestigious college] she was admitted to. Well she got her butt kicked there because she wasn't prepared to compete with her elbowy polished peers and just seemed to give up and party. She's currently loafing around [major city] still living off her parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

You sound as though your heart is sincerely in the right place, and as a Wilson parent, I appreciate that.

To say it’s a question of irresponsible parenting, or lack of will on the part of Wilson administration, is not really on target, with all due respect. My DH and I care passionately about our student’s behavior and academic performance, and are constantly engaging with teachers and our student. Wilson admin and/or individual teachers notify us promptly if our
student steps out of line even slightly. But as my student once pointed out: “One reason that teacher X always contacts you is that s/he knows you will listen. Whereas **** (name of classmate) doesn’t even care. (Not judging ****; who knows what challenges s/he is facing.)

I honestly think what differentiates public school from private is that private schools are able to select their students, and they are able to screen for impulse control, discipline issues, and academic focus/motivation. They are also able to expel or initiate a counselIng out process, from what I understand. But at the same time, these private schools are nurturing and understanding of age-appropriate foibles. I imagine all this creates positive peer pressure.

I honestly think that if private school parents would spend a bit of time this holiday season reflecting on their great good fortune in having found an academic environment that can effectively screen out untoward behaviors, you might see Wilson differently, and thus judge with different eyes.

I think your heart is also in the right place but should there not be some “positive peer pressure” at public schools as well? Do we all not have at least the obligation as humans and community members to not steal or deface property? Why should only private school families spend their holidays reflecting on their “great good fortune” — maybe some of the “passionate” families who are at Wilson could speak up in their community that this kind of behavior is wholly unacceptable instead of just throwing up your hands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

You sound as though your heart is sincerely in the right place, and as a Wilson parent, I appreciate that.

To say it’s a question of irresponsible parenting, or lack of will on the part of Wilson administration, is not really on target, with all due respect. My DH and I care passionately about our student’s behavior and academic performance, and are constantly engaging with teachers and our student. Wilson admin and/or individual teachers notify us promptly if our
student steps out of line even slightly. But as my student once pointed out: “One reason that teacher X always contacts you is that s/he knows you will listen. Whereas **** (name of classmate) doesn’t even care. (Not judging ****; who knows what challenges s/he is facing.)

I honestly think what differentiates public school from private is that private schools are able to select their students, and they are able to screen for impulse control, discipline issues, and academic focus/motivation. They are also able to expel or initiate a counselIng out process, from what I understand. But at the same time, these private schools are nurturing and understanding of age-appropriate foibles. I imagine all this creates positive peer pressure.

I honestly think that if private school parents would spend a bit of time this holiday season reflecting on their great good fortune in having found an academic environment that can effectively screen out untoward behaviors, you might see Wilson differently, and thus judge with different eyes.

I'm the PP to whom you're responding. For what it's worth, both my husband and I went to public school, which I'm sharing just to say where I'm coming from. You're absolutely right that public schools have to play the hand they are dealt. At my public school, the variance--on every possible measure--was huge. And public schools are often given very little in the way of support to manage it, and very much in the way of blame when it's not managed. And your experience, because it is with Wilson in particular, is more "valid," as it were, than mine w/r/t public school in general, since I didn't go to Wilson and do not have a child there. So I take your word that Wilson admin has the will. If you're willing to share, what do you think the delta is? Overcrowding? Lack of critical mass of bought-in families? Lack of support from DC Gov't? Sea change in public education over the past couple of decades?

My public school was large, diverse, and not without problems. But the problems we see and hear from Wilson students, in our direct experience, are orders of magnitude more problematic than what either DH or I encountered in our (imperfect and large) public schools.

I'm very supportive of public school education in general, but I am very aware that we "opted out," and therefore we are no longer direct stakeholders. And I know that not everyone has the options we had for our kids (my parents didn't). So absolutely NO pressure to respond. But if you are willing to respond, I would be curious how, as a community, we can be thinking productively for all of our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

What do you need to do to see STA’s issues?

No school is without issues, including STA. That's not really what this thread is about though. There are others on that. I suspect you're the PP whose numerous posts were deleted, coming back with a relatively vague post to avoid deletion. Even if not, the "what about-ism" re: different topics isn't particularly germane to this specific b-ball tournament event. If it's you again, I know you already disagree, but please don't derail the discussion again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll concede that when my child was 4 years old he was very lucky to be offered admission at BVR, considering that we are just regular middle class people with a HHI of about 100K at the time and we did not have a high profile job and were not legacies.

However, 14 years later when my son graduated from STA with numerous honors - that is on him- his hard work, dedication and thanks to the dedication and hard work of his excellent teachers and coaches.

His accomplishments aren't luck.

Had he once stolen, cursed at a teacher, assaulted someone I am quite sure he and our family would have been shown the door very swiftly and I would not have called that an " Unlucky break" - I would have called it a squandered opportunity and I would have assumed I was a bad parent

This part is only partially "luck." Beauvoir, and all private schools, actively seek out families like your's because you are the exact demographic to whom they want to give financial aid. Involved parents, lower HHI than is typical in this area or affordable at BVR, and a basically nice, smart kid who will have the back-up at home that he needs to succeed.

There are many key factors missing there on the profile of many kids at Wilson.

We are a Close family and know some wonderful families at Wilson with nice, smart kids who have the back-up at home to succeed. Those kids are on the honors track at Wilson and by all accounts doing well. From our outside perception, it seems like Wilson is a few schools in one, with a subset of families who are as respectable as they come with kids to match. Then there's a subset that just seems to be a mess. We've encountered that group in Tenleytown more times than we would have liked, and in every instance, it has been thoroughly unpleasant. And no, it's not about race or class, or even about public/private. It's about WILSON. Absent significant counter-pressure, tons of kids at Wilson are frankly just out of control. While some of that's on their families, some of that's on the leadership at Wilson imo. Again, the great families we know there believe in public education *despite* the issues at Wilson; they stick with it *despite* the overall lack of accountability and leadership; their kids are respectful and responsible *despite* the tide in the other direction there. You don't have to love STA--or even like STA--to see Wilson's issues. You don't have to love private school--or even like private school--to see Wilson's issues.

You sound as though your heart is sincerely in the right place, and as a Wilson parent, I appreciate that.

To say it’s a question of irresponsible parenting, or lack of will on the part of Wilson administration, is not really on target, with all due respect. My DH and I care passionately about our student’s behavior and academic performance, and are constantly engaging with teachers and our student. Wilson admin and/or individual teachers notify us promptly if our
student steps out of line even slightly. But as my student once pointed out: “One reason that teacher X always contacts you is that s/he knows you will listen. Whereas **** (name of classmate) doesn’t even care. (Not judging ****; who knows what challenges s/he is facing.)

I honestly think what differentiates public school from private is that private schools are able to select their students, and they are able to screen for impulse control, discipline issues, and academic focus/motivation. They are also able to expel or initiate a counselIng out process, from what I understand. But at the same time, these private schools are nurturing and understanding of age-appropriate foibles. I imagine all this creates positive peer pressure.

I honestly think that if private school parents would spend a bit of time this holiday season reflecting on their great good fortune in having found an academic environment that can effectively screen out untoward behaviors, you might see Wilson differently, and thus judge with different eyes.

I think your heart is also in the right place but should there not be some “positive peer pressure” at public schools as well? Do we all not have at least the obligation as humans and community members to not steal or deface property? Why should only private school families spend their holidays reflecting on their “great good fortune” — maybe some of the “passionate” families who are at Wilson could speak up in their community that this kind of behavior is wholly unacceptable instead of just throwing up your hands.

dp: The people who have “thrown up their hands” are the people who choose private schools. The families like the Wilson pp are the ones providing “positive peer influence.”

What are you doing — other than monetary donations — to improve the broader community?