If you are divorced and will never remarry

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$4.1mm in real estate (net of cap gain, still have mortgage $850k).
Income from real estate: $250,000/year
Employment income $60,000/year (mommy-tracked and recently went back to corporate)

43 y.o., one child almost college age; high net worth dad finances college.

I feel poor after a marriage with $1mm annual income where I could afford anything. Would marry again but only someone with assets and higher income than mine. I dont believe in marriage for love. Mine was for love and it fell apart in adultery. Partnership, good sex, common goals - this I believe into

Sounds like you married for love and ended up with money. Why NOT go for love when you have so much?

Talk about money not buying happiness…

I am the original poster: money, assets, corporate success completely destroyed my marriage. My exH became obnoxious, got a disgusting sense of self-entitlement. I was pulling off a lot with family real estate business but otherwise didn't have a high-flying corporate career. He was calling me "nobody" during the divorce. It was the hardest, the most demeaning experience of my life!
Even though I am now independently wealthy, these millions came to me and my son at expense of a deep psychological trauma. I know my exH is also very traumatized by divorce and won't trust a woman again. He thinks I ripped him off for millions - but it was 50/50 split, nothing more.

It will take me a long time to heal, and if I ever remarry it won't be before a 15-year mark with my next partner. I see no point remarrying a mingling assets: even best marriages built on love can fall apart suddenly and people have no control over it. I though I had control over my life, my husband, my child, my future when I was married. Apparently I had zero. It drives me mad

[Anonymous]

My mom said she would never remarry. My parents divorced when we were little. Just wanted to focus on the kids and her career. No interest at all.

Her friend came to her a few years later with the PERFECT guy for her. Mom said no - wouldn’t so much as look at a picture or go on a single date. Did not want to go down that road again.

Her friend waited a couple months, then invited her to a “dinner party” that was just this guy, and the friend left. Mom was livid at the friend, but didn’t want to be rude to the guy, so stayed for dinner.

They’ve been married for almost 30 years now, and he is truly perfect. For her, and for us kids, and now as a grandpa to our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You folks who “have your own retirement” and will never remarry, just curious what is your income and net worth?

$180k/year, no cash (bought ex out), own my house and have retirement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is so depressing.

This thread demonstrates there are so so many bitter women on this site…. “ Men” generalized, criticized over and over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? How old when you divorced? Why will you never remarry?

59, 59. Don't want to take care of another person ever again, except my children and grand children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom said she would never remarry. My parents divorced when we were little. Just wanted to focus on the kids and her career. No interest at all.

Her friend came to her a few years later with the PERFECT guy for her. Mom said no - wouldn’t so much as look at a picture or go on a single date. Did not want to go down that road again.

Her friend waited a couple months, then invited her to a “dinner party” that was just this guy, and the friend left. Mom was livid at the friend, but didn’t want to be rude to the guy, so stayed for dinner.

They’ve been married for almost 30 years now, and he is truly perfect. For her, and for us kids, and now as a grandpa to our kids.

The best reply here… I am the most recently divorced person on this board… and got soaked by a depressed/ OCD wife whose most consistent saying was “ it s been a long day”… as if every day is a curse. No matter how bitter, each day is a “gift”… the over rigid need to understand this.

[Anonymous]

There is no point in marrying if you're too old to have kids (possible exceptions for people who have no kids and older gay couples).

[Anonymous]

57, in process of separating currently. I hope to find someone eventually in another long-term relationship, but I would prefer not to be married again. Instead, if I meet someone, I hope for us to be long-term partners without mingled assets other than a joint checking account. Keeps it much cleaner for inheritances passing to the kids when the time comes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:57, in process of separating currently. I hope to find someone eventually in another long-term relationship, but I would prefer not to be married again. Instead, if I meet someone, I hope for us to be long-term partners without mingled assets other than a joint checking account. Keeps it much cleaner for inheritances passing to the kids when the time comes.

^^ PP here. If I do get married again, I’m assuming we’d both want a pre-nup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is so depressing.

This thread demonstrates there are so so many bitter women on this site…. “ Men” generalized, criticized over and over.

I am a man and I don't see it that way. What is the point if marriage if you aren't having kids? I will never marry again, but it doesn't mean I am not open to a committed long term relationship. I just don't need the government involved if the relationship needs to end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is so depressing.

This thread demonstrates there are so so many bitter women on this site…. “ Men” generalized, criticized over and over.

I am a man and I don't see it that way. What is the point if marriage if you aren't having kids? I will never marry again, but it doesn't mean I am not open to a committed long term relationship. I just don't need the government involved if the relationship needs to end.

my issue is not so much the assets, which can be taken care of in a prenup. But figuring out whether someone is actually worth marrying. I can’t see myself doing that in any fewer than 10 years … and at that point why marry?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread is so depressing.

This thread demonstrates there are so so many bitter women on this site…. “ Men” generalized, criticized over and over.

I am a man and I don't see it that way. What is the point if marriage if you aren't having kids? I will never marry again, but it doesn't mean I am not open to a committed long term relationship. I just don't need the government involved if the relationship needs to end.

Women that are reading this are mad that there are people that don’t want to mix finances because that is why they marry, so somebody can support them. That is “true love” to them. Most of us want that money fir our children/grandchildren and ourselves and they think that is “selfish”. But I think it’s selfish gut an adult to expect to fiend other rolled money.

[Anonymous]

^ Have you actually read this thread? Most of the women have said they would not remarry bc they don’t want to commingle assets, take care of someone, etc. Just like the men who responded.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? How old when you divorced? Why will you never remarry?

59, 59. Don't want to take care of another person ever again, except my children and grand children.

Amen. Cannot wait for my gray divorce! Counting down the years. Will take a 3 month cruise to celebrate right after the 6 month separation clocks out. Hooray! No more idiotic selfish narc spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? How old when you divorced? Why will you never remarry?

I said I’d never remarry and then 9 years later, I remarried.