Deciding good enough is good enough?

[Anonymous]

I'm 45, and for most of my life I have been slim--the kind of slim where people comment "whoa, you're tiny." In the last 5 years or so, I have gotten a bit softer and thicker in my midsection. By all relative standards I am still slim, just not like how I once was.

I work out basically every day, but I know that it's diet that makes the difference, and if I were to be strict about my food intake and macros, I could probably get back to, or close to, where I once was. Thing is, I love to eat. I like finding new recipes and new restaurants and am not particularly focused on super healthy eating.

I'm not convinced that nothing tastes as good as being thin. Has anyone just decided that eating is one of life's great pleasures and it's not worth it to deprive yourself? Should I just rock my softer bod and make the decision that this is my new normal and that's okay? I'm curious about other people's paths towards acceptance, or even love (!), of their new bodies.

[Anonymous]

eye roll

[Anonymous]

I think your vanity is pathetic

[Anonymous]

Good enough is good enough. Enjoy food, enjoy your life, enjoy your health.

[Anonymous]

Well, I’m early 40s, a size 10, also work out most days. I’ve never been thin since puberty. But I *am* really strong, nothing hurts, I have no health issues (thank God). Other than 3 pregnancies, I have been within 5 lbs of this weight for my entire adult life.

One day a few months ago I just decided: this is it, this is my body. It’s a great body. I’m never going to be 10 lbs lighter. I’m not going to try to change it for aesthetic reasons anymore. My midsection will always be soft and jiggly.

What I will do is continue to do strength and cardio and eat reasonably well. But I’m not giving up tasty food.

Anyways, it was a simple decision to accept my body just the way it is right now. I’ve been surprised how well the mind shift has stuck, honestly. It’s starting to free up some brain space that I used to devote to self “improvement”. I hope you can get some peace, too. It’s not worth thinking about anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:eye roll

+1

[Anonymous]

OP, I totally relate. I'm 43, and also work pretty hard with fitness and generally get comments from other women about how thin I am. Genetically, I'm lucky, and I also enjoy eating a mostly vegetarian diet. But I also love sweets and wine and other bad things, and as I age (and see that I'm softening in ways I never have before!) have had the same conversation with myself that you're describing. I've never actually dieted before, and I don't want to start now. I just have to accept that I am a little vain, and also to learn to let that go. It's not important in the grand scheme of things!

[Anonymous]

OP, I could have written the post directly above mine. I have a very similar story to yours, plus add in a severely anorexic/body obsessed mother. I’ve decided it’s okay for me to be a bit vain (yes, negative PPs above, I am a little vain!), but it’s also crucial that I accept my aging body. It’s done some damn awesome things and it’s strong and healthy.

So, at 44, I’ve decided to accept my body but also to treat it as well as I can. That means keeping my mind healthy with lots of sweaty exercise and keeping my body healthy with good, clean food, limited alcohol, and lots of sleep. I do track macros. I don’t consider it a diet (I’m the poster of the thread about how eating way more has made me lose weight), but it does help me stay clean.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I could have written the post directly above mine. I have a very similar story to yours, plus add in a severely anorexic/body obsessed mother. I’ve decided it’s okay for me to be a bit vain (yes, negative PPs above, I am a little vain!), but it’s also crucial that I accept my aging body. It’s done some damn awesome things and it’s strong and healthy.

So, at 44, I’ve decided to accept my body but also to treat it as well as I can. That means keeping my mind healthy with lots of sweaty exercise and keeping my body healthy with good, clean food, limited alcohol, and lots of sleep. I do track macros. I don’t consider it a diet (I’m the poster of the thread about how eating way more has made me lose weight), but it does help me stay clean.

This is so puritanical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I could have written the post directly above mine. I have a very similar story to yours, plus add in a severely anorexic/body obsessed mother. I’ve decided it’s okay for me to be a bit vain (yes, negative PPs above, I am a little vain!), but it’s also crucial that I accept my aging body. It’s done some damn awesome things and it’s strong and healthy.

So, at 44, I’ve decided to accept my body but also to treat it as well as I can. That means keeping my mind healthy with lots of sweaty exercise and keeping my body healthy with good, clean food, limited alcohol, and lots of sleep. I do track macros. I don’t consider it a diet (I’m the poster of the thread about how eating way more has made me lose weight), but it does help me stay clean.

This is so puritanical.

Okay.

But I feel freaking amazing.

[Anonymous]

I too used to be whip thin, OP. I never got it back after having children. I have two requirements for myself: I stay below a certain weight and I stay active in HIIT classes. I figure as long as I am still somewhat fit and active and can squat and jump and all those things, I am healthy. For me it's more about functional fitness and not just looking good. I eat whatever I want on an IF interval, and the weight limit is just something I set for myself so I didn't let myself indulge too much. This is me in my 40s and I'm happy with the balance. I'll revisit in my 50s when menopause sets in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I could have written the post directly above mine. I have a very similar story to yours, plus add in a severely anorexic/body obsessed mother. I’ve decided it’s okay for me to be a bit vain (yes, negative PPs above, I am a little vain!), but it’s also crucial that I accept my aging body. It’s done some damn awesome things and it’s strong and healthy.

So, at 44, I’ve decided to accept my body but also to treat it as well as I can. That means keeping my mind healthy with lots of sweaty exercise and keeping my body healthy with good, clean food, limited alcohol, and lots of sleep. I do track macros. I don’t consider it a diet (I’m the poster of the thread about how eating way more has made me lose weight), but it does help me stay clean.

This is so puritanical.

Okay.

But I feel freaking amazing.

You've also described me. It can sound puritanical to others but I also feel amazing. Those who are quick to criticize are usually (not always but usually) those who have not been successful in controlling their eating habits and thus have slowly gained weight over the years. Suddenly they're staring at 50 years of age, and realized they're also 50lbs heavier than they were in their 30's. I know I'm right about this, but no one will admit this.

[Anonymous]

I can relate. Early 40s here and have been petite my entire life. My mid-section is getting softer and less defined with age and I have to ask myself what is the tradeoff that's worth it to please that vanity? I think as long as my body works (I work out 4-5 times a week), I'm not going to go crazy on diets. I've never dieted my entire life. I am conscious of what I eat (mostly unprocessed and fresh) but also don't want to deprive myself of dessert, wine, etc. on occasion (and vacations).

This is my body, I accept it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I could have written the post directly above mine. I have a very similar story to yours, plus add in a severely anorexic/body obsessed mother. I’ve decided it’s okay for me to be a bit vain (yes, negative PPs above, I am a little vain!), but it’s also crucial that I accept my aging body. It’s done some damn awesome things and it’s strong and healthy.

So, at 44, I’ve decided to accept my body but also to treat it as well as I can. That means keeping my mind healthy with lots of sweaty exercise and keeping my body healthy with good, clean food, limited alcohol, and lots of sleep. I do track macros. I don’t consider it a diet (I’m the poster of the thread about how eating way more has made me lose weight), but it does help me stay clean.

This is so puritanical.

Okay.

But I feel freaking amazing.

You've also described me. It can sound puritanical to others but I also feel amazing. Those who are quick to criticize are usually (not always but usually) those who have not been successful in controlling their eating habits and thus have slowly gained weight over the years. Suddenly they're staring at 50 years of age, and realized they're also 50lbs heavier than they were in their 30's. I know I'm right about this, but no one will admit this.

Puritanical is just a dumb buzz word used by somebody that can’t imagine actually enjoying fresh food and not drinking frequently and feeling healthy. It is what it is.

And for those that slowly gained the weight and did not correct their ship by age 40, it’s a much faster sled ride to the bottom on average with a ton more bumps along the way. Longevity may end up being the same, but life quality is much much better while being allegedly “puritanical.”

[Anonymous]

I personally think everyone is healthier if they are 10-20lb overweight.

I think it’s important to work on balance (no falls) and light weights 3x a week so your torso/arm/legs have some muscle to support your back/hips/posture.

Otherwise I think being thin is unhealthy both mentally and physically.