Kid said the n word to my kid

Anonymous
My 8yo likes to play basketball at the playground across the street from our house. Recently we’ve started letting him go on his own and he enjoys it. Today he came running home after maybe 20 mins and said that another kid said “hey have you ever said the n word” (but actually saying the word). DS knows that is a word he doesn’t say and he was upset by it. I took him back over to the park and told the kid (probably @8th grade) to please remember to watch his language around the littler kids. The kid blank stared at me and said he wasn’t talking to my kid, I reiterated that he should watch his language around younger kids and then he told me to F off.

Not much more I can do wrt the other kid, and I can return to taking my kid to the park but the independence was good for him. Would you do anything else?
Anonymous
Yeah I'd post about it on NextDoor. Describe the kid and name the park.
Anonymous
Not only did he say the N-word but he also told you to F off?!

Do you know where he lives or who his parents are? I would get on my neighborhood listserv and say that if your child was at the basketball court at X time on X date, please know he’s disrespectful using the N-word and telling adults to F off. There are young kids, who don’t need to be listening to that language.
Anonymous
I don’t know him, his parents or where he lives. He may live nearby or maybe not. This was a school playground.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I don’t know him, his parents or where he lives. He may live nearby or maybe not. This was a school playground.


Yes so you get on ND or your neighborhood group and try to find the parents.
Anonymous
Not buying what you're selling.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Not buying what you're selling.


Huh?
Anonymous
Great time to teach your kid that if they're somewhere and something makes them uncomfortable, they should leave, and, they can only control themselves, not others. Your son's job is to NOT say the n-word or curse at adults. He can't control what other kids say.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Great time to teach your kid that if they're somewhere and something makes them uncomfortable, they should leave, and, they can only control themselves, not others. Your son's job is to NOT say the n-word or curse at adults. He can't control what other kids say.


Yeah, he did the right thing and I have spoken with him about that. But maybe those with teens can also remind their kids to watch their language especially around younger kids. And not to swear at adults.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Not buying what you're selling.

I find it totally believable. One time at Cox Farms, a littler kid was crying and my autistic 10 year old asked the kid’s parents if he was okay, and his mom told my dd to f*ck off.

OP, was your son under the impression that the older kid was asking him if he’d said the “n” word or did your son just overhear the kid asking someone else? If your ds wasn’t being asked, you really overstepped. Your 8yo should not be playing around 8th graders if you don’t want him to hear things that aren’t age appropriate.
Anonymous
I’ll take things that did not happen for $200
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Yeah I'd post about it on NextDoor. Describe the kid and name the park.


NO! Don't start naming and shaming children online this early. Jesus, you are inviting a lawsuit with that kind of behavior. This is a problem that needs to be handled by communicating with the child's parents and then keeping your distance from the child until you know his behavior has improved. Honestly, it probably won't improve, but you can pick and choose who your own children hang out with.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I’ll take things that did not happen for $200


I don't know, I've seen and heard some weird things at public parks.
Anonymous
I live next to basketball courts. If you are in your basketball courts, you are going to hear the N-word.

I have asked the boys to be careful because if the kids go to school and use the N-word, they’re gonna assume I taught it to them.

This seems to be a message that they are able to receive. But the reality is if you’re gonna be near a basketball court you’re gonna hear the N-word.

You have to teach kids they can’t repeat it.

When kids come over and playing and I told her mom, they’re going to play basketball. I also mention they will probably hear the N-word.
Anonymous
^^^ my voice to text is terrible, so I hope you guys understand what I was saying
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