if you or your spouse cheated- how did you tell the kids?
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Anonymous
| what did you say? How did you deal with the guilt? |
Anonymous
| Oh, this one is easy. You don’t tell them. Next |
Anonymous
| They find out when the spouse marries the AP or the AP gets pregnant. If you're the one that cheated, then guilt is normal. You didn't think of the consequences beforehand so guilt comes with the territory. Depending on the age of the kids, you could put off telling them. You also run the risk of the spouse telling the kids so you might want to tell them on your terms. You can also see a therapist and get ideas on the best way to tell the kids. |
Anonymous
| Why would you tell the kids? |
Anonymous
Why would you burden your children with this? |
Anonymous
| Unless you are separating or divorcing, there is no reason to tell them. |
Anonymous
|
Kids are pretty smart and can sense when something is going on. They figure out more than parents realize.
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Anonymous
| Not only are you a cheater, but you want to unburden yourself onto your kids?? What is wrong with you? Get help. You are a sick person. |
Anonymous
| DCUM believes in telling the whole truth all the time. Except when pulled over by the police. |
Anonymous
| Don't tell them. They don't care about your feeling and slept with whom. You both suck, probably stink and nobody has business sleeping with any of you. It's gross to think your parents think they are good enough to sleep with other people while they couldn't even pick the right person to marry. |
Anonymous
Exactly. |
Anonymous
|
Do you update your kids on everything to do with your sex life, every fight you have, etc.?
My husband had an affair when the kids were 3 and 5. Obviously we did not tell them. |
Anonymous
| The opposite of telling them isn’t normalcy. It’s the kids intuitively sensing that there is a family secret they aren’t part of; that parents are losing something; that at least one parent had some kind of major issue parents won’t discuss. |
Anonymous
| OP, why do you think you should tell them? And, no, I believe that this isn't something kids need to know. But do you have a reason for wanting to tell them? |
Anonymous
| Even if you are divorcing because of the affair, there is no reason to tell the children the reasons for the divorce! |