Never Been Married- 45 Year Old Woman

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a never married 45 year old woman. No kids.

I don't have any more issues than anyone else and in some ways my life has been far more carefree and drama free than many of my married friends.

I completely understand how different life is for parents and married folks. Most of my friends and siblings have had kids over the years and I have changed my plans to accommodate them 1000s of times. I also am usually the last person consulted about plans as they assume I have the most flexible schedule.

For the most part, I still think I could be in a healthy happy relationship - as least as healthy and happy as those I see around me.

The hardest part for me would be that I have lived alone for 12 years. Sharing my space and my life would be an adjustment. The only person I have had to be responsible to or for is myself. However my nature I am a pretty generous and giving person and in past relationships, I haven't been about myself so I think that is not a major issue. What I think would be the hardest is that I have become very independent and being alone means you only have yourself so giving some of that up to let another person meet my needs or do things for me may be a challenge. I manage all my own emotions with no one to talk to, I come home to an empty house every day and spend a great deal of time alone. I do everything that needs to be done - from home repairs to financial decisions to career changes - all without anyone to confer with or make decisions with. I dealt with a major illness and went through it alone. I am just used to meeting all my own needs, making all the decisions that need to be made about my life myself, planning all my own time, coping with life alone. I trust myself and I think at this point, it will take someone pretty amazing or a love at first sight scenario to change the status quo.

Just to add I do have friends and family (I am not socially alone) but everyone has very busy lives and lots of their own responsibilities and so I rarely turn to others as I likely I have more resources myself than they have. I tend instead to help others out but rarely ask for help myself. In times when I have, there are people who respond.

I have gotten to travel the world, make risky career and life choices, go on adventures, live in different places - all without needing to consider someone else. There is a freedom in that. However there is also a loneliness.

How many cats?

How many jigsaw puzzles?

Be HONEST.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh. I am 43 and think I’m pretty normal. But I have a lot of scissors in online dating so maybe that’s why. Maybe my competition is not tough. I get lots of attention. I’m dating someone seriously now though so haven’t been on in a while.

Success not scissors
Autocorrect

I preferred it as scissors.

+1 It sounded stabby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?

Yes, I am.

dp than why are you divorced if you are?

Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.

By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.

So I’m a fail because my ex wife basically went nuts? And apparently she was hiding it all along?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a never married 45 year old woman. No kids.

I don't have any more issues than anyone else and in some ways my life has been far more carefree and drama free than many of my married friends.

I completely understand how different life is for parents and married folks. Most of my friends and siblings have had kids over the years and I have changed my plans to accommodate them 1000s of times. I also am usually the last person consulted about plans as they assume I have the most flexible schedule.

For the most part, I still think I could be in a healthy happy relationship - as least as healthy and happy as those I see around me.

The hardest part for me would be that I have lived alone for 12 years. Sharing my space and my life would be an adjustment. The only person I have had to be responsible to or for is myself. However my nature I am a pretty generous and giving person and in past relationships, I haven't been about myself so I think that is not a major issue. What I think would be the hardest is that I have become very independent and being alone means you only have yourself so giving some of that up to let another person meet my needs or do things for me may be a challenge. I manage all my own emotions with no one to talk to, I come home to an empty house every day and spend a great deal of time alone. I do everything that needs to be done - from home repairs to financial decisions to career changes - all without anyone to confer with or make decisions with. I dealt with a major illness and went through it alone. I am just used to meeting all my own needs, making all the decisions that need to be made about my life myself, planning all my own time, coping with life alone. I trust myself and I think at this point, it will take someone pretty amazing or a love at first sight scenario to change the status quo.

Just to add I do have friends and family (I am not socially alone) but everyone has very busy lives and lots of their own responsibilities and so I rarely turn to others as I likely I have more resources myself than they have. I tend instead to help others out but rarely ask for help myself. In times when I have, there are people who respond.

I have gotten to travel the world, make risky career and life choices, go on adventures, live in different places - all without needing to consider someone else. There is a freedom in that. However there is also a loneliness.

How many cats?

How many jigsaw puzzles?

Be HONEST.

NP. What the h*ll kind of an a**hole response is that to a very thoughtful post?

You should be ashamed of yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?

Yes, I am.

dp than why are you divorced if you are?

Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.

By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.

So I’m a fail because my ex wife basically went nuts? And apparently she was hiding it all along?

No don't listen to these haters. My DH is a total catch and his ex deliberately hid some serious stuff from him...she lied to his face that she wanted kids!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a never married 45 year old woman. No kids.

I don't have any more issues than anyone else and in some ways my life has been far more carefree and drama free than many of my married friends.

I completely understand how different life is for parents and married folks. Most of my friends and siblings have had kids over the years and I have changed my plans to accommodate them 1000s of times. I also am usually the last person consulted about plans as they assume I have the most flexible schedule.

For the most part, I still think I could be in a healthy happy relationship - as least as healthy and happy as those I see around me.

The hardest part for me would be that I have lived alone for 12 years. Sharing my space and my life would be an adjustment. The only person I have had to be responsible to or for is myself. However my nature I am a pretty generous and giving person and in past relationships, I haven't been about myself so I think that is not a major issue. What I think would be the hardest is that I have become very independent and being alone means you only have yourself so giving some of that up to let another person meet my needs or do things for me may be a challenge. I manage all my own emotions with no one to talk to, I come home to an empty house every day and spend a great deal of time alone. I do everything that needs to be done - from home repairs to financial decisions to career changes - all without anyone to confer with or make decisions with. I dealt with a major illness and went through it alone. I am just used to meeting all my own needs, making all the decisions that need to be made about my life myself, planning all my own time, coping with life alone. I trust myself and I think at this point, it will take someone pretty amazing or a love at first sight scenario to change the status quo.

Just to add I do have friends and family (I am not socially alone) but everyone has very busy lives and lots of their own responsibilities and so I rarely turn to others as I likely I have more resources myself than they have. I tend instead to help others out but rarely ask for help myself. In times when I have, there are people who respond.

I have gotten to travel the world, make risky career and life choices, go on adventures, live in different places - all without needing to consider someone else. There is a freedom in that. However there is also a loneliness.

How many cats?

How many jigsaw puzzles?

Be HONEST.

Zero cats. I am allergic to animals so pets are off the table however I am not home enough to be a good pet owner anyways.

I love jigsaw puzzles but have never done one in my own house. I think of them as fun things to do on vacation and my parents always have a jigsaw puzzle on the go at their place so anytime I visit, I will work on it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?

Yes, I am.

dp than why are you divorced if you are?

Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.

By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.

So I’m a fail because my ex wife basically went nuts? And apparently she was hiding it all along?

Lazy, cliche response-my ex was crazy blah blah whine whine..maybe you drove her crazy. I wouldn’t call you a catch in that case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a never married 45 year old woman. No kids.

I don't have any more issues than anyone else and in some ways my life has been far more carefree and drama free than many of my married friends.

I completely understand how different life is for parents and married folks. Most of my friends and siblings have had kids over the years and I have changed my plans to accommodate them 1000s of times. I also am usually the last person consulted about plans as they assume I have the most flexible schedule.

For the most part, I still think I could be in a healthy happy relationship - as least as healthy and happy as those I see around me.

The hardest part for me would be that I have lived alone for 12 years. Sharing my space and my life would be an adjustment. The only person I have had to be responsible to or for is myself. However my nature I am a pretty generous and giving person and in past relationships, I haven't been about myself so I think that is not a major issue. What I think would be the hardest is that I have become very independent and being alone means you only have yourself so giving some of that up to let another person meet my needs or do things for me may be a challenge. I manage all my own emotions with no one to talk to, I come home to an empty house every day and spend a great deal of time alone. I do everything that needs to be done - from home repairs to financial decisions to career changes - all without anyone to confer with or make decisions with. I dealt with a major illness and went through it alone. I am just used to meeting all my own needs, making all the decisions that need to be made about my life myself, planning all my own time, coping with life alone. I trust myself and I think at this point, it will take someone pretty amazing or a love at first sight scenario to change the status quo.

Just to add I do have friends and family (I am not socially alone) but everyone has very busy lives and lots of their own responsibilities and so I rarely turn to others as I likely I have more resources myself than they have. I tend instead to help others out but rarely ask for help myself. In times when I have, there are people who respond.

I have gotten to travel the world, make risky career and life choices, go on adventures, live in different places - all without needing to consider someone else. There is a freedom in that. However there is also a loneliness.

How many cats?

How many jigsaw puzzles?

Be HONEST.

Be honest that you aren't funny. You are unoriginal and boring. You would high five an unmarried 45 year old male and call him a bachelor. You pigeon hole people into their little boxes that you have been told they fit and in your small little unimaginative mind you can't even begin to understand that people are different and that life today is anything goes.

Of course you would say the never married 45 year old woman would have cats because you are so amazingly stupid, you are led so easily by others opinions you can't even form your own and you should be embarrassed to admit to being so close minded. The cat lady jokes are so old and I cringe for people when they use them.

So go back to thinking you are wonderful because no one else will think that. You aren't wonderful, you aren't attractive, you aren't witty, you aren't funny, you aren't nice. You are really nothing and your opinion is small minded, stupid, narrow, boring and unsophisticated. You could only dream of a life this poster has, I can guarantee your life is so much less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a never married 45 year old woman. No kids.

I don't have any more issues than anyone else and in some ways my life has been far more carefree and drama free than many of my married friends.

I completely understand how different life is for parents and married folks. Most of my friends and siblings have had kids over the years and I have changed my plans to accommodate them 1000s of times. I also am usually the last person consulted about plans as they assume I have the most flexible schedule.

For the most part, I still think I could be in a healthy happy relationship - as least as healthy and happy as those I see around me.

The hardest part for me would be that I have lived alone for 12 years. Sharing my space and my life would be an adjustment. The only person I have had to be responsible to or for is myself. However my nature I am a pretty generous and giving person and in past relationships, I haven't been about myself so I think that is not a major issue. What I think would be the hardest is that I have become very independent and being alone means you only have yourself so giving some of that up to let another person meet my needs or do things for me may be a challenge. I manage all my own emotions with no one to talk to, I come home to an empty house every day and spend a great deal of time alone. I do everything that needs to be done - from home repairs to financial decisions to career changes - all without anyone to confer with or make decisions with. I dealt with a major illness and went through it alone. I am just used to meeting all my own needs, making all the decisions that need to be made about my life myself, planning all my own time, coping with life alone. I trust myself and I think at this point, it will take someone pretty amazing or a love at first sight scenario to change the status quo.

Just to add I do have friends and family (I am not socially alone) but everyone has very busy lives and lots of their own responsibilities and so I rarely turn to others as I likely I have more resources myself than they have. I tend instead to help others out but rarely ask for help myself. In times when I have, there are people who respond.

I have gotten to travel the world, make risky career and life choices, go on adventures, live in different places - all without needing to consider someone else. There is a freedom in that. However there is also a loneliness.

What was your longest relationship? Do you meet men on your travels? Do you find yourself choosing men that are in some way unavailable so they don't cramp your style?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?

Yes, I am.

dp than why are you divorced if you are?

Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.

By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.

=1,000,000
Lots of reasons including - one or both parties lack good character, lack good judgment of character, have no commitment, do not understand the nature of adult relationships and the compromises required to make them work, so both or one party immature with unrealistic expectations, I could go on...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?

Yes, I am.

dp than why are you divorced if you are?

Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.

By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.

So I’m a fail because my ex wife basically went nuts? And apparently she was hiding it all along?

Lazy, cliche response-my ex was crazy blah blah whine whine..maybe you drove her crazy. I wouldn’t call you a catch in that case.

Why are you so angry about being alone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?

Yes, I am.

dp than why are you divorced if you are?

Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.

By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.

=1,000,000
Lots of reasons including - one or both parties lack good character, lack good judgment of character, have no commitment, do not understand the nature of adult relationships and the compromises required to make them work, so both or one party immature with unrealistic expectations, I could go on...

Of course you could go on. You could send the entire weekend I'm sure. Because you have no kids or husband occupying your time...

[Anonymous]

This thread is full of a lot of people who have little to no self-awareness. I was single, I was married and now I'm divorced and none of those relationship statuses make me better -- or worse -- than any other person out here seeking a partner and companionship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a never married 45 year old woman. No kids.

I don't have any more issues than anyone else and in some ways my life has been far more carefree and drama free than many of my married friends.

I completely understand how different life is for parents and married folks. Most of my friends and siblings have had kids over the years and I have changed my plans to accommodate them 1000s of times. I also am usually the last person consulted about plans as they assume I have the most flexible schedule.

For the most part, I still think I could be in a healthy happy relationship - as least as healthy and happy as those I see around me.

The hardest part for me would be that I have lived alone for 12 years. Sharing my space and my life would be an adjustment. The only person I have had to be responsible to or for is myself. However my nature I am a pretty generous and giving person and in past relationships, I haven't been about myself so I think that is not a major issue. What I think would be the hardest is that I have become very independent and being alone means you only have yourself so giving some of that up to let another person meet my needs or do things for me may be a challenge. I manage all my own emotions with no one to talk to, I come home to an empty house every day and spend a great deal of time alone. I do everything that needs to be done - from home repairs to financial decisions to career changes - all without anyone to confer with or make decisions with. I dealt with a major illness and went through it alone. I am just used to meeting all my own needs, making all the decisions that need to be made about my life myself, planning all my own time, coping with life alone. I trust myself and I think at this point, it will take someone pretty amazing or a love at first sight scenario to change the status quo.

Just to add I do have friends and family (I am not socially alone) but everyone has very busy lives and lots of their own responsibilities and so I rarely turn to others as I likely I have more resources myself than they have. I tend instead to help others out but rarely ask for help myself. In times when I have, there are people who respond.

I have gotten to travel the world, make risky career and life choices, go on adventures, live in different places - all without needing to consider someone else. There is a freedom in that. However there is also a loneliness.

How many cats?

How many jigsaw puzzles?

Be HONEST.

Pretty sure her life is better than yours given you were nasty enough to write something like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You, of course, being divorced with children, are quite the prize, right?

Yes, I am.

dp than why are you divorced if you are?

Different 52yo divorced man here. But people divorce for all kinds of reasons. Doesn’t mean he isn’t a catch. It takes two to make a marriage work.

By definition, a divorced man is never a catch, he's a fail. Sorry.

So I’m a fail because my ex wife basically went nuts? And apparently she was hiding it all along?

Lazy, cliche response-my ex was crazy blah blah whine whine..maybe you drove her crazy. I wouldn’t call you a catch in that case.

Why are you so angry about being alone?

Ok, now we know for a fact that you’re not a catch.