WWYD if you found out former nanny lied to you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I do not micromanage but she should tell me if she's going to take my kid somewhere he doesn't normally go to. My former nanny lives 20 miles away so what would be the point in going to her house to eat lunch? And yes, she's asked me before if she could take my kid to her house and I said no.

I forgot to mention the photos were dated right around when she was moving out of her other apartment. There were moving boxes in the photos so I'm guessing she brought my son to her house while she was moving.

And no she doesn't have newer references, her last day was a couple weeks ago. I would think another family would want to know something like this.

Just curious, why did you say no? Did you not trust her?

Hi OP here again, I just don't see the point in her taking my son to her house. He has class (art, gym, etc) everyday in the morning, then lunch at home, nap, sometimes a play date so I don't see what benefit he gets from being in the car 30+ minutes each way to hang out at her house. She obviously asked me because she had a personal (very long) errand to run, but that's what leave should be used for.

As a nanny, I get why you are upset but I still couldn’t work for you or ppl like you. You are not alone in your feelings. However, you are making a mountain out of a molehill and willing to sabotage someone else’s career just bc you feel disrespected. You may not think your micromanage but you do based on your responses and reaction. You want to be vindictive and this isn’t worth it. Was your child traumatized? And be honest, how annoyed would you have been if your nanny asked for the day off to pack to move? Would you have paid her normal rate or less?

As a nanny this nanny is not making your profession look good. It’s out of bounds behavior. You would be asked to leave any position for this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I do not micromanage but she should tell me if she's going to take my kid somewhere he doesn't normally go to. My former nanny lives 20 miles away so what would be the point in going to her house to eat lunch? And yes, she's asked me before if she could take my kid to her house and I said no.

I forgot to mention the photos were dated right around when she was moving out of her other apartment. There were moving boxes in the photos so I'm guessing she brought my son to her house while she was moving.

And no she doesn't have newer references, her last day was a couple weeks ago. I would think another family would want to know something like this.

Just curious, why did you say no? Did you not trust her?

Hi OP here again, I just don't see the point in her taking my son to her house. He has class (art, gym, etc) everyday in the morning, then lunch at home, nap, sometimes a play date so I don't see what benefit he gets from being in the car 30+ minutes each way to hang out at her house. She obviously asked me because she had a personal (very long) errand to run, but that's what leave should be used for.

Really Nanny? You wouldn't want to work for a family in which the parents had a problem with a nanny directly going against expressed rules, including taking- assuming in this area- the kids for at least a couple hours to a place that the nanny was explicitly not supposed to go to?

As a nanny, I get why you are upset but I still couldn’t work for you or ppl like you. You are not alone in your feelings. However, you are making a mountain out of a molehill and willing to sabotage someone else’s career just bc you feel disrespected. You may not think your micromanage but you do based on your responses and reaction. You want to be vindictive and this isn’t worth it. Was your child traumatized? And be honest, how annoyed would you have been if your nanny asked for the day off to pack to move? Would you have paid her normal rate or less?

Yes, really.

I wouldn’t work for this particular type of family. After the update, I of course don’t agree with what the nanny did. However, the way OP had responded previously was enough for me to know her personality type. I prefer families who aren’t making a list of rules, that trust my judgment and aren’t micromanaging. I also wouldn’t do what OP’s nanny did. I also don’t work with first time parents unless it’s in a nanny share that include a second time mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I do not micromanage but she should tell me if she's going to take my kid somewhere he doesn't normally go to. My former nanny lives 20 miles away so what would be the point in going to her house to eat lunch? And yes, she's asked me before if she could take my kid to her house and I said no.

I forgot to mention the photos were dated right around when she was moving out of her other apartment. There were moving boxes in the photos so I'm guessing she brought my son to her house while she was moving.

And no she doesn't have newer references, her last day was a couple weeks ago. I would think another family would want to know something like this.

Just curious, why did you say no? Did you not trust her?

Hi OP here again, I just don't see the point in her taking my son to her house. He has class (art, gym, etc) everyday in the morning, then lunch at home, nap, sometimes a play date so I don't see what benefit he gets from being in the car 30+ minutes each way to hang out at her house. She obviously asked me because she had a personal (very long) errand to run, but that's what leave should be used for.

As a nanny, I get why you are upset but I still couldn’t work for you or ppl like you. You are not alone in your feelings. However, you are making a mountain out of a molehill and willing to sabotage someone else’s career just bc you feel disrespected. You may not think your micromanage but you do based on your responses and reaction. You want to be vindictive and this isn’t worth it. Was your child traumatized? And be honest, how annoyed would you have been if your nanny asked for the day off to pack to move? Would you have paid her normal rate or less?

As a nanny this nanny is not making your profession look good. It’s out of bounds behavior. You would be asked to leave any position for this.

This nanny’s behavior doesn’t represent the profession. And if you feel as though it does,! then it’s clear you don’t employ nor have employed a nanny. I wouldn’t do what this nanny did and know plenty of other nannies who wouldn’t either.

[Anonymous]

What she did was wrong but she lied to you most likely because she didn't think you would approve her leave for the time she needed. But I pretty much think this post is troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I do not micromanage but she should tell me if she's going to take my kid somewhere he doesn't normally go to. My former nanny lives 20 miles away so what would be the point in going to her house to eat lunch? And yes, she's asked me before if she could take my kid to her house and I said no.

I forgot to mention the photos were dated right around when she was moving out of her other apartment. There were moving boxes in the photos so I'm guessing she brought my son to her house while she was moving.

And no she doesn't have newer references, her last day was a couple weeks ago. I would think another family would want to know something like this.

Just curious, why did you say no? Did you not trust her?

Hi OP here again, I just don't see the point in her taking my son to her house. He has class (art, gym, etc) everyday in the morning, then lunch at home, nap, sometimes a play date so I don't see what benefit he gets from being in the car 30+ minutes each way to hang out at her house. She obviously asked me because she had a personal (very long) errand to run, but that's what leave should be used for.

As a nanny, I get why you are upset but I still couldn’t work for you or ppl like you. You are not alone in your feelings. However, you are making a mountain out of a molehill and willing to sabotage someone else’s career just bc you feel disrespected. You may not think your micromanage but you do based on your responses and reaction. You want to be vindictive and this isn’t worth it. Was your child traumatized? And be honest, how annoyed would you have been if your nanny asked for the day off to pack to move? Would you have paid her normal rate or less?

As a nanny this nanny is not making your profession look good. It’s out of bounds behavior. You would be asked to leave any position for this.

This nanny’s behavior doesn’t represent the profession. And if you feel as though it does,! then it’s clear you don’t employ nor have employed a nanny. I wouldn’t do what this nanny did and know plenty of other nannies who wouldn’t either.

Haha you made me laugh! Yes I have employed nannies. You wouldn’t make it past the first interview.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I do not micromanage but she should tell me if she's going to take my kid somewhere he doesn't normally go to. My former nanny lives 20 miles away so what would be the point in going to her house to eat lunch? And yes, she's asked me before if she could take my kid to her house and I said no.

I forgot to mention the photos were dated right around when she was moving out of her other apartment. There were moving boxes in the photos so I'm guessing she brought my son to her house while she was moving.

And no she doesn't have newer references, her last day was a couple weeks ago. I would think another family would want to know something like this.

Just curious, why did you say no? Did you not trust her?

Hi OP here again, I just don't see the point in her taking my son to her house. He has class (art, gym, etc) everyday in the morning, then lunch at home, nap, sometimes a play date so I don't see what benefit he gets from being in the car 30+ minutes each way to hang out at her house. She obviously asked me because she had a personal (very long) errand to run, but that's what leave should be used for.

As a nanny, I get why you are upset but I still couldn’t work for you or ppl like you. You are not alone in your feelings. However, you are making a mountain out of a molehill and willing to sabotage someone else’s career just bc you feel disrespected. You may not think your micromanage but you do based on your responses and reaction. You want to be vindictive and this isn’t worth it. Was your child traumatized? And be honest, how annoyed would you have been if your nanny asked for the day off to pack to move? Would you have paid her normal rate or less?

As a nanny this nanny is not making your profession look good. It’s out of bounds behavior. You would be asked to leave any position for this.

This nanny’s behavior doesn’t represent the profession. And if you feel as though it does,! then it’s clear you don’t employ nor have employed a nanny. I wouldn’t do what this nanny did and know plenty of other nannies who wouldn’t either.

Haha you made me laugh! Yes I have employed nannies. You wouldn’t make it past the first interview.

What’s funny? That you think one nanny’s bad behavior represents the profession and someone disagrees?

Yeah your kind of family isn’t even on my radar. Plus, I don’t even apply for positions anymore. Nor do I meet with families who think they need multiple interviews or have had multiple nannies. Both huge red flags. I am solely word of mouth and families contact me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, how about you spend some time giving attention to your kid instead posting on DCUM? Who knows what kind of neglect he underwent when he was in the care of this person.

I hope you find some peace and happiness in your life, you clearly need it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I do not micromanage but she should tell me if she's going to take my kid somewhere he doesn't normally go to. My former nanny lives 20 miles away so what would be the point in going to her house to eat lunch? And yes, she's asked me before if she could take my kid to her house and I said no.

I forgot to mention the photos were dated right around when she was moving out of her other apartment. There were moving boxes in the photos so I'm guessing she brought my son to her house while she was moving.

And no she doesn't have newer references, her last day was a couple weeks ago. I would think another family would want to know something like this.

Just curious, why did you say no? Did you not trust her?

Hi OP here again, I just don't see the point in her taking my son to her house. He has class (art, gym, etc) everyday in the morning, then lunch at home, nap, sometimes a play date so I don't see what benefit he gets from being in the car 30+ minutes each way to hang out at her house. She obviously asked me because she had a personal (very long) errand to run, but that's what leave should be used for.

As a nanny, I get why you are upset but I still couldn’t work for you or ppl like you. You are not alone in your feelings. However, you are making a mountain out of a molehill and willing to sabotage someone else’s career just bc you feel disrespected. You may not think your micromanage but you do based on your responses and reaction. You want to be vindictive and this isn’t worth it. Was your child traumatized? And be honest, how annoyed would you have been if your nanny asked for the day off to pack to move? Would you have paid her normal rate or less?

As a nanny this nanny is not making your profession look good. It’s out of bounds behavior. You would be asked to leave any position for this.

This nanny’s behavior doesn’t represent the profession. And if you feel as though it does,! then it’s clear you don’t employ nor have employed a nanny. I wouldn’t do what this nanny did and know plenty of other nannies who wouldn’t either.

Haha you made me laugh! Yes I have employed nannies. You wouldn’t make it past the first interview.

What’s funny? That you think one nanny’s bad behavior represents the profession and someone disagrees?

Yeah your kind of family isn’t even on my radar. Plus, I don’t even apply for positions anymore. Nor do I meet with families who think they need multiple interviews or have had multiple nannies. Both huge red flags. I am solely word of mouth and families contact me.

I’m sure they do. Not.

[Anonymous]

Go back to the nanny forum honey. This this the employer forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go back to the nanny forum honey. This this the employer forum.

Who in the world are you talking to? Also, this is neither of those forums, silly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I do not micromanage but she should tell me if she's going to take my kid somewhere he doesn't normally go to. My former nanny lives 20 miles away so what would be the point in going to her house to eat lunch? And yes, she's asked me before if she could take my kid to her house and I said no.

I forgot to mention the photos were dated right around when she was moving out of her other apartment. There were moving boxes in the photos so I'm guessing she brought my son to her house while she was moving.

And no she doesn't have newer references, her last day was a couple weeks ago. I would think another family would want to know something like this.

Just curious, why did you say no? Did you not trust her?

Hi OP here again, I just don't see the point in her taking my son to her house. He has class (art, gym, etc) everyday in the morning, then lunch at home, nap, sometimes a play date so I don't see what benefit he gets from being in the car 30+ minutes each way to hang out at her house. She obviously asked me because she had a personal (very long) errand to run, but that's what leave should be used for.

As a nanny, I get why you are upset but I still couldn’t work for you or ppl like you. You are not alone in your feelings. However, you are making a mountain out of a molehill and willing to sabotage someone else’s career just bc you feel disrespected. You may not think your micromanage but you do based on your responses and reaction. You want to be vindictive and this isn’t worth it. Was your child traumatized? And be honest, how annoyed would you have been if your nanny asked for the day off to pack to move? Would you have paid her normal rate or less?

As a nanny this nanny is not making your profession look good. It’s out of bounds behavior. You would be asked to leave any position for this.

This nanny’s behavior doesn’t represent the profession. And if you feel as though it does,! then it’s clear you don’t employ nor have employed a nanny. I wouldn’t do what this nanny did and know plenty of other nannies who wouldn’t either.

Haha you made me laugh! Yes I have employed nannies. You wouldn’t make it past the first interview.

What’s funny? That you think one nanny’s bad behavior represents the profession and someone disagrees?

Yeah your kind of family isn’t even on my radar. Plus, I don’t even apply for positions anymore. Nor do I meet with families who think they need multiple interviews or have had multiple nannies. Both huge red flags. I am solely word of mouth and families contact me.

I’m sure they do. Not.

Thank you for confirming my point. You aren’t professional and have no idea how most experienced nannies find their positions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go back to the nanny forum honey. This this the employer forum.

Who in the world are you talking to? Also, this is neither of those forums, silly.

I’m confused too. That poster is clearly trolling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just found out our former nanny of 3 years lied to us. On her last day (a couple weeks ago) she put together one of those snapfish type photo albums and gave it to my son as a goodbye gift. I was flipping through it today and noticed there were several pictures of her and my son at her apartment eating lunch - she never told me or asked me if it was ok to do this by the way. I asked my son about it and he said that they only went there a few times but I don't know how much I can trust the memory of a 3 year old. I'm pretty upset over this and want to confront her, but my husband thinks it's useless to at this point. If another family calls us for a referral though, my husband thinks it would be good for us to tell them the truth about what happened.

What would you do? Let it go or say something?

Why don't you sue her and then the whole world will know you're an idiot!

[Anonymous]

The attitudes of nannies and employers toward each other on this thread are ... enlightening.

[Anonymous]

Your life is full of people who have lied to you. Some you realize, some you never realize. Move on or spend every day trying to track them down.