Husband had a baby with assistant update

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Apart from all the emotions here, I'm curious how this will be settled as a legal matter. The married couple are raising the child as their own (and that seems fine with exH/bio dad?) yet they're seeking to legally sever ties from he only father relationship this child knows. All this for child support. Is that right?

It sounds like it is all about money. He'd being an idiot for paying child support now without a court order and more importantly, a paternity test. They are spending thousands on attorney's when a paternity test is a few hundred dollars. It sounds like "dad" is allowed to be the favorite uncle in exchange for cash. But, OP is saying mixed things such as mom wants dad to have the kid for 10 days a month to he only gets visits 2 weekly at a public park.

OP here- What? He is not paying child support. He has not seen the child in months. If he is required to pay child support, the kid's last name is changed to his and he is determined the legal father, he will have 30/70 custody (around 10 days a month) and 50/50 legal custody. The family court system now gives generous rights to fathers.

There is no DNA at this point. None. I have not wanted him to do DNA until my settlement was complete. She has wanted DNA all along. He did not do it because I asked him to let me get my child support in place first.

Do you really think she would go this far if she wasn't 100% sure it was his? Always a small chance but I doubt it.
My child support is in place. The child support she receives goes off the reduced income from what we get.


DNA away at this point.

So now she wanted Dna all along? When you posted about this originally your husband did and she balked:

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/360/419905.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So annoying when DCUM sleuths think they've found a hole in someone's story, but they actually just have really shitty reading comprehension skills.

Not that PP but have you read all of her threads? Holes that could eat galaxies. If not, keep reading, it'll become more clear to you.

I've read on this thread what people consider to be holes. It's just very basic, easy to understand stuff (for most people)...what the situation is now vs. what the situation will be going forward, after the OP's divorce is finalized, and after this other case is settled. What this woman wants the arrangement to be vs. what the arrangement is now/has been. It seems like some people just can't manage to wrap their heads around that.

I guess I'm just as bored as the OP today. For me, it started falling apart with that line about the crummy condo followed by concern for the kids. I thought it seemed like a spurned wife's fantasy to see her cheating husband being forced to support two families with no custody while he's reduced to living with his mother. That is just the perfect vengeance, right?

But it just made the rest of the story sound like fantasy as well, so I went back and read. The details get hokey on the very first page of the thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So annoying when DCUM sleuths think they've found a hole in someone's story, but they actually just have really shitty reading comprehension skills.

Not that PP but have you read all of her threads? Holes that could eat galaxies. If not, keep reading, it'll become more clear to you.

I've read on this thread what people consider to be holes. It's just very basic, easy to understand stuff (for most people)...what the situation is now vs. what the situation will be going forward, after the OP's divorce is finalized, and after this other case is settled. What this woman wants the arrangement to be vs. what the arrangement is now/has been. It seems like some people just can't manage to wrap their heads around that.

I guess I'm just as bored as the OP today. For me, it started falling apart with that line about the crummy condo followed by concern for the kids. I thought it seemed like a spurned wife's fantasy to see her cheating husband being forced to support two families with no custody while he's reduced to living with his mother. That is just the perfect vengeance, right?

But it just made the rest of the story sound like fantasy as well, so I went back and read. The details get hokey on the very first page of the thread.

I can't find the one she posted at Christmas but it was like someone's Lifetime Movie fantasy come to life. The OW lives in a trailer with her husband (who in the first thread had left her) with tons of blow up Christmas decorations on the lawn. In anger one night OP SLASHED one and yelled to all the neighbors a whore lived there! And got a restraining order! But her husband was still at home with the extended family having a good old fashioned family Christmas because OP requested it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you work too, and you're so concerned about your kids having to spend time in a dumpy condo he shares with his mom, why did you negotiate for more child support than he is required to pay?

To keep my kids in their childhood home that they love. To allow them to continue to play the travel sports that they love. I work but with the formula, we would have to sell our home and I will not let that happen. The condo is not in the "hood" for crying out loud. It is 10 minutes from our house and they are super close to their grandma.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So annoying when DCUM sleuths think they've found a hole in someone's story, but they actually just have really shitty reading comprehension skills.

Not that PP but have you read all of her threads? Holes that could eat galaxies. If not, keep reading, it'll become more clear to you.

I've read on this thread what people consider to be holes. It's just very basic, easy to understand stuff (for most people)...what the situation is now vs. what the situation will be going forward, after the OP's divorce is finalized, and after this other case is settled. What this woman wants the arrangement to be vs. what the arrangement is now/has been. It seems like some people just can't manage to wrap their heads around that.

I guess I'm just as bored as the OP today. For me, it started falling apart with that line about the crummy condo followed by concern for the kids. I thought it seemed like a spurned wife's fantasy to see her cheating husband being forced to support two families with no custody while he's reduced to living with his mother. That is just the perfect vengeance, right?

But it just made the rest of the story sound like fantasy as well, so I went back and read. The details get hokey on the very first page of the thread.

I can't find the one she posted at Christmas but it was like someone's Lifetime Movie fantasy come to life. The OW lives in a trailer with her husband (who in the first thread had left her) with tons of blow up Christmas decorations on the lawn. In anger one night OP SLASHED one and yelled to all the neighbors a whore lived there! And got a restraining order! But her husband was still at home with the extended family having a good old fashioned family Christmas because OP requested it.

OP here. Not even close.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So annoying when DCUM sleuths think they've found a hole in someone's story, but they actually just have really shitty reading comprehension skills.

Not that PP but have you read all of her threads? Holes that could eat galaxies. If not, keep reading, it'll become more clear to you.

I've read on this thread what people consider to be holes. It's just very basic, easy to understand stuff (for most people)...what the situation is now vs. what the situation will be going forward, after the OP's divorce is finalized, and after this other case is settled. What this woman wants the arrangement to be vs. what the arrangement is now/has been. It seems like some people just can't manage to wrap their heads around that.

I guess I'm just as bored as the OP today. For me, it started falling apart with that line about the crummy condo followed by concern for the kids. I thought it seemed like a spurned wife's fantasy to see her cheating husband being forced to support two families with no custody while he's reduced to living with his mother. That is just the perfect vengeance, right?

But it just made the rest of the story sound like fantasy as well, so I went back and read. The details get hokey on the very first page of the thread.

I can't find the one she posted at Christmas but it was like someone's Lifetime Movie fantasy come to life. The OW lives in a trailer with her husband (who in the first thread had left her) with tons of blow up Christmas decorations on the lawn. In anger one night OP SLASHED one and yelled to all the neighbors a whore lived there! And got a restraining order! But her husband was still at home with the extended family having a good old fashioned family Christmas because OP requested it.

OP here. Not even close.

That is exactly what you said at the time but you probably got Jeff to delete the thread at some point so you can claim you never did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you work too, and you're so concerned about your kids having to spend time in a dumpy condo he shares with his mom, why did you negotiate for more child support than he is required to pay?

He hasn't moved into the condo and is still living at the house. Makes no sense for him not to move over the summer and get settled vs. have it a s big shock for the kids during the middle of the school year. She took more child support to block the other mom/child from getting it. $1800 for two kids is not a high earner amount, especially if she is leaving him broke enough where he cannot get a 1-2 bedroom apartment.

The 1800.00 is the child support that will be given to the other woman and the child. (And her husband). He is not a real high earner but is paying me more. The problem is that he will have to support three households.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you work too, and you're so concerned about your kids having to spend time in a dumpy condo he shares with his mom, why did you negotiate for more child support than he is required to pay?

He hasn't moved into the condo and is still living at the house. Makes no sense for him not to move over the summer and get settled vs. have it a s big shock for the kids during the middle of the school year. She took more child support to block the other mom/child from getting it. $1800 for two kids is not a high earner amount, especially if she is leaving him broke enough where he cannot get a 1-2 bedroom apartment.

The 1800.00 is the child support that will be given to the other woman and the child. (And her husband). He is not a real high earner but is paying me more. The problem is that he will have to support three households.

Yikes!? How much does the other woman and her husband earn? 1800 seems really high even if your soon to be ex-H gets to see/care for the child 10days/month.

Has it crossed your mind that this woman is out to make a profit on ruining a marriage and bringing a precious child into the picture?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you work too, and you're so concerned about your kids having to spend time in a dumpy condo he shares with his mom, why did you negotiate for more child support than he is required to pay?

He hasn't moved into the condo and is still living at the house. Makes no sense for him not to move over the summer and get settled vs. have it a s big shock for the kids during the middle of the school year. She took more child support to block the other mom/child from getting it. $1800 for two kids is not a high earner amount, especially if she is leaving him broke enough where he cannot get a 1-2 bedroom apartment.

The 1800.00 is the child support that will be given to the other woman and the child. (And her husband). He is not a real high earner but is paying me more. The problem is that he will have to support three households.

Yikes!? How much does the other woman and her husband earn? 1800 seems really high even if your soon to be ex-H gets to see/care for the child 10days/month.

Has it crossed your mind that this woman is out to make a profit on ruining a marriage and bringing a precious child into the picture?

Yes in her first thread she claims the OW probably got pregnant on purpose

[Anonymous]

OP why do you think it is right for your husband to pay you more for your kids than he would be ordered to and less to his other child. Is it because the other child will have an additional parent? You could go out and get another spouse to. Would that then make your children entitled to less?

Despite the circumstances behind the child's conception and birth, it does appear to be his child.

I feel really bad for you and ALL of the kids involved ... this whole situation if messed up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So annoying when DCUM sleuths think they've found a hole in someone's story, but they actually just have really shitty reading comprehension skills.

Not that PP but have you read all of her threads? Holes that could eat galaxies. If not, keep reading, it'll become more clear to you.

I've read on this thread what people consider to be holes. It's just very basic, easy to understand stuff (for most people)...what the situation is now vs. what the situation will be going forward, after the OP's divorce is finalized, and after this other case is settled. What this woman wants the arrangement to be vs. what the arrangement is now/has been. It seems like some people just can't manage to wrap their heads around that.

I guess I'm just as bored as the OP today. For me, it started falling apart with that line about the crummy condo followed by concern for the kids. I thought it seemed like a spurned wife's fantasy to see her cheating husband being forced to support two families with no custody while he's reduced to living with his mother. That is just the perfect vengeance, right?

But it just made the rest of the story sound like fantasy as well, so I went back and read. The details get hokey on the very first page of the thread.

I can't find the one she posted at Christmas but it was like someone's Lifetime Movie fantasy come to life. The OW lives in a trailer with her husband (who in the first thread had left her) with tons of blow up Christmas decorations on the lawn. In anger one night OP SLASHED one and yelled to all the neighbors a whore lived there! And got a restraining order! But her husband was still at home with the extended family having a good old fashioned family Christmas because OP requested it.

PP here. Yeah, the charade part seemed really off in that thread. Who puts on like that for two years - out of concern for the kids - yet really seems to relish the sorry state of affairs to come?

[Anonymous]

Kudos to you OP. I wish you the best of luck and hope your kids take the news ok. Prayers for you/them.

[Anonymous]

NP here.

Best of luck to you and your family OP.

I would just advise that your husband stop trying to play hardball. The paternity test is inevitable. He needs to simply give it to her instead of waiting on a court order. The attorney simply wants to milk this case for all he can. He's not concerned about the best interest of your family.

It's clear the AP and husband want to have their cake and eat it too. They get to stay together, raise the child, but get financial support from your husband. And I think they'll have it their way. If they decide to stay together, that's on them. But your husband will still have to support his child. Usually the only time a court will refuse to sever paternity ties is if there's no one to step into the role of father. The courts will not legally bastardize a child. They will, however, make changes to acknowledge the true biological father.But you never know. As you said, it depends on the judge and what kind of morning s/he has.

As far as the child support the AP did not get for the past two years, it is very possible he will be forced to pay it. My sister insisted on back child support for the 1st 3 years of her child's life after things were finally addressed in court when he was 3. And she got it. The father could not afford the lump some but was ordered to pay on top of the original amount until the past debt was settled.

Finally, I do vaguely recall a post about you slashing Christmas decorations in front of the AP's dingy $19,000 home. But that's neither here nor there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you work too, and you're so concerned about your kids having to spend time in a dumpy condo he shares with his mom, why did you negotiate for more child support than he is required to pay?

He hasn't moved into the condo and is still living at the house. Makes no sense for him not to move over the summer and get settled vs. have it a s big shock for the kids during the middle of the school year. She took more child support to block the other mom/child from getting it. $1800 for two kids is not a high earner amount, especially if she is leaving him broke enough where he cannot get a 1-2 bedroom apartment.

The 1800.00 is the child support that will be given to the other woman and the child. (And her husband). He is not a real high earner but is paying me more. The problem is that he will have to support three households.

Yikes!? How much does the other woman and her husband earn? 1800 seems really high even if your soon to be ex-H gets to see/care for the child 10days/month.

Has it crossed your mind that this woman is out to make a profit on ruining a marriage and bringing a precious child into the picture?

Actually her husband ruined their marriage by cheating on her. The OW was lucky and her marriage was not ruined by it. $1800 may be what she is asking but who knows if she'll get it. And, ex is asking for 10 days, but doubtful he'll get it given there has been no contact.

Not sure what the husband thought would happen if he had an affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP here.

Best of luck to you and your family OP.

I would just advise that your husband stop trying to play hardball. The paternity test is inevitable. He needs to simply give it to her instead of waiting on a court order. The attorney simply wants to milk this case for all he can. He's not concerned about the best interest of your family.

It's clear the AP and husband want to have their cake and eat it too. They get to stay together, raise the child, but get financial support from your husband. And I think they'll have it their way. If they decide to stay together, that's on them. But your husband will still have to support his child. Usually the only time a court will refuse to sever paternity ties is if there's no one to step into the role of father. The courts will not legally bastardize a child. They will, however, make changes to acknowledge the true biological father.But you never know. As you said, it depends on the judge and what kind of morning s/he has.

As far as the child support the AP did not get for the past two years, it is very possible he will be forced to pay it. My sister insisted on back child support for the 1st 3 years of her child's life after things were finally addressed in court when he was 3. And she got it. The father could not afford the lump some but was ordered to pay on top of the original amount until the past debt was settled.

Finally, I do vaguely recall a post about you slashing Christmas decorations in front of the AP's dingy $19,000 home. But that's neither here nor there.

Usually child support is retroactive to the date of filing, not birth. But, it really depends on the judge. In this case he knew about the child and refuses to acknowledge paternity. Its going to get very messy.