Nephew with celiac - what is fair/appropriate when visiting grandma?

[Anonymous]

Hi OP, my SIL and brothers son have several allergies (peanut, egg). Luckily my daughter is not a picky eater. But I find "preping" her before we go by trying to pick out allergy safe foods her cousin can eat. Practicing and making her part of the process helps. Yeah, it sucks (eggs!! her favorite) but I figure, we only have to do it a short time and they deal with it forever.

Your SIL sounds like this is new, and she is going way, way over the top. Hopefully you guys will laugh about it in a few years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - yes, both kitchens are GF because grandma is in charge of the main one and she has already GF'ed it. PPs are right - you have to throw out butter, peanut butter, jelly, pretty much anything someone may have touched with a utensil that touched a gluten product. Now that that is done she doesn't want to undo it. The guest cabin is just a kitchenette with no food in it, so it isn't that it is GF, but it isn't available to us because BIL and SIL are staying there. I am going to try some of the GF products (bread, noodles, nuggets) on my kids this week in a blind test to see if we can slide by. Otherwise I will have to ask for some kind of accommodation.

Also, to the PPS saying my kids are too picky - I'm not the same PP who has said 'my kids would starve' at every list that has been provided, but seriously, they don't eat most of the stuff recommended. They eat yogurt, cheese, and tons of fruit, but aren't big on beans, meat (other than nuggets and hamburgers) or eggs. We can manage GF snacks no problem, but to keep them not seriously hungry for 5 days seems like a bigger challenge. At our house they eat a perfectly healthy and balanced diet so I've never worried about their pickiness.

I would make this a short trip. Too many things at once -- the family seems a bit cray cray overboard and grandma is totally on board. And you are 4.5 HOURS away from civilization (and sanity)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Has no one ever heard of labels? Grandma actually threw out peanut butter because the knife once touched wheat bread?

WAY over the top.

Not really. The people with Celiac we know have their own butter dish, peanut butter jar,...... Cross contamination is a problem. It really depends onthe severity of the disease in the individual.

It depends on the severity. Cross-contamination is not a problem for the majority of Celiacs. This is only an issue for those with severe reactions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Has no one ever heard of labels? Grandma actually threw out peanut butter because the knife once touched wheat bread?

WAY over the top.

Not really. The people with Celiac we know have their own butter dish, peanut butter jar,...... Cross contamination is a problem. It really depends onthe severity of the disease in the individual.

It depends on the severity. Cross-contamination is not a problem for the majority of Celiacs. This is only an issue for those with severe reactions.

Some people who have the disease may find they can handle cross contamination, but people tend to be very sick when diagnosed, and cross contamination during the.months when you are healing is a huge problem. Also, the brain growth in a two year old is crucial, so protecting a young child is particularly important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - interesting how split the responses are. A few more details: the place is VERY remote - 4 hour drive from major airport, and we are flying/driving. So no hotels nearby, and no Whole Foods or Wegmans either - the GF substitutes will be the ones available at the Super Target 1.5 hours away.

So you have a plane ride, first, and then a 4 hour drive. I still think you can cook some pasta at home, freeze it in a big ziplock bag, put in a soft sided insulated cooler, and bring it with you. Make your children's favorite boxed mac and cheese, and freeze that as well. It will thaw in the cooler for 8 hours, put it in the fridge when you get there. With mac and cheese, spaghetti, and some aluminum foil you can feed your children food they are used to for a few meals (maybe when 2 year old is sleeping).

Kids can live 5 days without goldfish crackers.

You can make mac and cheese in a microwave. That is a bit extreme. Other family should do that, not them.

[Anonymous]

My vote is to suck it up since this is the first time you have stayed with them since your nephew was diagnosed. They are in crisis mode, trying to figure out how to prevent their son from being sick all the time. Try some of the gluten free products folks have recommended, and Google to see which brands of bread/pasta/etc people find better than others.

After you have done this, in the future ask for the cabin. They ARE being unreasonable, but I would give them some time to figure it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - interesting how split the responses are. A few more details: the place is VERY remote - 4 hour drive from major airport, and we are flying/driving. So no hotels nearby, and no Whole Foods or Wegmans either - the GF substitutes will be the ones available at the Super Target 1.5 hours away.

So you have a plane ride, first, and then a 4 hour drive. I still think you can cook some pasta at home, freeze it in a big ziplock bag, put in a soft sided insulated cooler, and bring it with you. Make your children's favorite boxed mac and cheese, and freeze that as well. It will thaw in the cooler for 8 hours, put it in the fridge when you get there. With mac and cheese, spaghetti, and some aluminum foil you can feed your children food they are used to for a few meals (maybe when 2 year old is sleeping).

Kids can live 5 days without goldfish crackers.

You can make mac and cheese in a microwave. That is a bit extreme. Other family should do that, not them.

Can you? I have always cooked it on the stove. But yes, under normal circumstances of course you can just cook your own noodles there at the location. But if you are trying to keep the kitchen entirely gluten free and not get into a hassle with in laws, just cook everything at home and heat it up super quickly in the microwave before they can even notice. Do it while everyone's out taking a hike or something. Bim bam boom, your kids are fed their mac and cheese and no one is even the wise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Has no one ever heard of labels? Grandma actually threw out peanut butter because the knife once touched wheat bread?

WAY over the top.

Not really. The people with Celiac we know have their own butter dish, peanut butter jar,...... Cross contamination is a problem. It really depends onthe severity of the disease in the individual.

It depends on the severity. Cross-contamination is not a problem for the majority of Celiacs. This is only an issue for those with severe reactions.

Cross contamination is not a major issue for people who are gluten intolerant, but it IS a major issue for people who have celiac disease.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Just out of curiosity what do they eat for protein? Other than the nuggets, you haven't mentioned anything with gluten.

They probably eat spaghetti, mac and cheese, breaded chicken nuggets, hamburgers and hot dogs with rolls, and peanut butter sandwiches. Goldfish crackers (Annie's Bunnies or what have you) and cookies and pretzels for snacks.

Gluten free breads don't taste the same, and gluten free pasta doesn't taste that great either.

[Anonymous]

You can also do Mac and cheese in a crock pot. Just warn them not to use the crock pot.

[Anonymous]

From the SIL POV, if you are 4.5 hours from civilization, where is the nearest hospital? If she is newly diagnosed, she may be worried if there is cross contamination it's far to get her two year old to a medical facility.

[Anonymous]

Holy jebus. I have read the entire thread.

There is no way in hell I would not be absolutely, perfectly, sincerely, and abashedly embarrassed to have to cancel three days before because -- wouldn't you know it, life always throws things at you like this -- seems like we've picked up the stomach bug going around. It's terrible. DH and I will feel queasy, and I will have been around people who've been vomiting [I'm sure they've vomited before at some point, at least someone I've seen recently]. Heavens, we can't bring that to a remote place with the Grandma and the new baby. So very very sorry. We'll see if we can pay a fee and use the tickets another time. Unfortunately, we won't make it at the same times as everyone else, but at least we'll see Grandma, and we'll try to make it out to see the in-laws and cousins (and new baby!) as soon as we can. Of course we will stay in a hotel -- you don't need to deal with visitors with a new baby! The kids will love camping out in a hotel room, but we'll have such an amazing time in between meals. It will be great.

So very, very sorry. We feel terrible about letting you down. Gosh, life sure is complicated. Thank you for understanding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:From the SIL POV, if you are 4.5 hours from civilization, where is the nearest hospital? If she is newly diagnosed, she may be worried if there is cross contamination it's far to get her two year old to a medical facility.

Add to that a newborn and I completely "side" with SIL on this one. OP and her family can be flexible.

Worst-case for SIL and family: A severe illness for a 2yo, on top of traveling with infant and 2yo, which blows even under the best of circumstances.

Worst-case for OP and family: Kids whine a bit, but are provided with nutritious food, and are FINE.

Hats off to SIL for agreeing to this trip, in light of everything. It shows she is flexible, values family, and is willing to go to some trouble to please her MIL and extended family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our 2yo nephew has celiac. The whole family is visiting grandma's summer home for 5 days this summer. She has fully cleansed the kitchen in the main house to protect him, and the rule is no gluten products there. I assumed we would get the guest cabin which has a kitchenette, so I figured we would feed our kids there when necessary, but I learned that nephew's parents claimed it (they also have a new baby so they should get first pick) so we are in the main house. This would be fine with me but for now we have no place to feed our kids any of the foods they normally eat, most of which have gluten (sandwiches, pizza, hamburgers, chicken nuggets, pasta, crackers, etc). I honestly can't think of more than one meal they eat that doesn't have some gluten in it). I really don't want to be trapped at the house for 5 days with hungry kids, and there are no restaurants nearby, but celiac is serious and I understand why they are worried about contamination. What accommodations can I ask for, if any, without being a brat? Or should I just suck it up and make my kids live on fruit and cheese sticks all week?

Gluten free pizza from Pizza Hut
Make chicken nuggets at home with potato chips for breading
Make pasta with rice noodles (Asian food section at grocery store_
Make mac and cheese with gluten free pasta

[Anonymous]

You both sound pretty inflexible. You, for example, think vacation is ruined if ice cream can't be eaten in a cone! There are gf sugar and regular cones, or, heaven forbid, they can eat it in a bowl. Or have a Klondike bar.

Target carries Applegate gf chicken nuggets and corn dogs.