Fighting a Restraining Order

[Anonymous]

7-page thread on some bullshit...not bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. TRO was dropped due to lack of evidence and the judge said "the fact this was issued months after the incident shows no real threat to the petitioner".

So there you go.

Glad to hear it! Makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. TRO was dropped due to lack of evidence and the judge said "the fact this was issued months after the incident shows no real threat to the petitioner".

So there you go.

That's good for you. But I hope you learned your lesson. Don't mess with other people's husband's and perhaps they won't mess with you either. I'm not being snarky, but you seem to feel that you're a victim here, and I hope you see that you hurt this woman badly enough that she resorted to this action. Stop being so smug about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. TRO was dropped due to lack of evidence and the judge said "the fact this was issued months after the incident shows no real threat to the petitioner".

So there you go.

That's good for you. But I hope you learned your lesson. Don't mess with other people's husband's and perhaps they won't mess with you either. I'm not being snarky, but you seem to feel that you're a victim here, and I hope you see that you hurt this woman badly enough that she resorted to this action. Stop being so smug about this.

To be fair, husband ( who is the real violator) is living high and dry and OP is dealing with restraining orders?

Yes, OP did not exercise the best judgement, but legal action against a third party is just vengeful . There always seems to be punishment for the OW, while husband plays the victim of the evil seductress.

OP did nothing (on,y judging by post and judges decision) to warrant actual legal recourse. Check your marriage, then check the other people. Ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Yes but it warned the OP, caused anxiety and stress, time on here plus printing Maps and a lot of mental energy, she had to go to court, and experience all the headache and agitation.

So not really a clear win for the OP. Which may have been the intent of the AP wife after all

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. TRO was dropped due to lack of evidence and the judge said "the fact this was issued months after the incident shows no real threat to the petitioner".

So there you go.

That's good for you. But I hope you learned your lesson. Don't mess with other people's husband's and perhaps they won't mess with you either. I'm not being snarky, but you seem to feel that you're a victim here, and I hope you see that you hurt this woman badly enough that she resorted to this action. Stop being so smug about this.

To be fair, husband ( who is the real violator) is living high and dry and OP is dealing with restraining orders?

Yes, OP did not exercise the best judgement, but legal action against a third party is just vengeful . There always seems to be punishment for the OW, while husband plays the victim of the evil seductress.

OP did nothing (on,y judging by post and judges decision) to warrant actual legal recourse. Check your marriage, then check the other people. Ridiculous.

She has shown zero remorse. As for the husband, well he's married to a vengeful woman still, so I wouldn't say he's off the hook entirely.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Shown zero remorse? In December when she found out about the affair, she called me repeatedly over days and left messages about how horrible I was and to fuck off and go to hell. I figured I deserved it.
She also publicly announced on FB that I cheated with her husband which resulted in a few weeks of her friends telling me what I slut I was. I never retaliated or was mean in return. I wrote her a 3 page long apology and expressed how sorry I was. I went to counseling to deal with my guilt of what I have done.

You cannot base your assumption on if I am sorry or not based on me asking a legal question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Shown zero remorse? In December when she found out about the affair, she called me repeatedly over days and left messages about how horrible I was and to fuck off and go to hell. I figured I deserved it.
She also publicly announced on FB that I cheated with her husband which resulted in a few weeks of her friends telling me what I slut I was. I never retaliated or was mean in return. I wrote her a 3 page long apology and expressed how sorry I was. I went to counseling to deal with my guilt of what I have done.

You cannot base your assumption on if I am sorry or not based on me asking a legal question.

You are only sorry because the wife found out. There is something called "karma". You violated someone's family. You violated the chance of having a stable home for the kids who didn't choose a morally flawed dad. Do you understand that you don't have to be the other women, but you choose to be so. Moving forward you will never feel secure in your relationship. Today or tomorrow you will feel the same pain that you put on the wife. Regardless of what excuse you have you really harmed yourself and those poor kids. Hope you sleep well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. TRO was dropped due to lack of evidence and the judge said "the fact this was issued months after the incident shows no real threat to the petitioner".

So there you go.

That's good for you. But I hope you learned your lesson. Don't mess with other people's husband's and perhaps they won't mess with you either. I'm not being snarky, but you seem to feel that you're a victim here, and I hope you see that you hurt this woman badly enough that she resorted to this action. Stop being so smug about this.

I have to agree. A friend was recently blindsided by her husband's affair and was so, do devastated - she's just in agony. Dont get in the middle of that s**t anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Shown zero remorse? In December when she found out about the affair, she called me repeatedly over days and left messages about how horrible I was and to fuck off and go to hell. I figured I deserved it.
She also publicly announced on FB that I cheated with her husband which resulted in a few weeks of her friends telling me what I slut I was. I never retaliated or was mean in return. I wrote her a 3 page long apology and expressed how sorry I was. I went to counseling to deal with my guilt of what I have done.

You cannot base your assumption on if I am sorry or not based on me asking a legal question.

You were stalking her FB?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wrote her a 3 page long apology and expressed how sorry I was.

Interesting. How did you know the address to mail your 3 page long apology?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think there is a lot more to this story.

Me too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You reap what you sow. Good. I'm glad when people investigate you they can see what kind of a person you really are.

Give it a rest. People make mistakes. Hopefully lesson learned and won't be repeated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wrote her a 3 page long apology and expressed how sorry I was.

Interesting. How did you know the address to mail your 3 page long apology?

I emailed her, I was her friend so I know her email address.
And No, I did not stalk her facebook, there are other ways to know information on facebook. Like for instance, I was told she announced it and it was backed up by various people messaging me about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, the restraining order is silly - what is she worried about? I can't see a judge ordering it.

HOWEVER,
1) Why do you care if you have one since you ended the affair
2) I do not believe that you "unknowingly" drove past her house. If a car simply drives down the street, there is just zero chance that she would have noticed. If a car slows down...stops...drives by repeatedly... then you notice. Meaning, I think you intentionally did drive by the house, even if on your way to a job interview.

I agree with number 2. She would have had to be watching the street like a hawk to see your car zoom by. Are you tellling us everything , OP?

NP here. The wife might have had cameras set up to catch OP in the act - there are amazing cameras right now that have night vision, etc. There are even cameras with no LED, so you can not tell they exist or are on and functioning properly - only the owner would know.

OP, does the wife and family live on a dead end street? If so, you might be screwed.