Signs your child is on the verge of being "Counseled Out" top private

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Title III of the ADA applies to public accommodations, which includes private schools. The only schools that are ADA exempt are, ironically, parochial schools. If you scroll down on the links I posted you'll see there are three laws that protect kids with disabilities (mental or physical): IDEA applies to public schools, Section 504 applies to public and private schools that receive federal aid, and Title III of the ADA, applies to public accommodations, including non-religious private schools.
So, if a kid is otherwise qualified to be at the school (passed admissions requirements, is ok academically) and can be reasonably accommodated, a non-religious private school cannot remove a child for a disability.
Funny, we paid full tuition and got counseled out anyway. A friend in a similar situation just made a $25k donation to the school and suddenly everything's right again. How is that any different than extorting extra money out of families with disabled kids? And no, it is not legal to charge disabled kids extra.

I'm pretty sure that in some situations it is. For example, I know that mainstream summer camps will require parents to pay for a shadow for certain kids as a basis for their attending the school.

[Anonymous]

Also, PP, if you actually won such a case (which you won't) it would guarantee that schools would never accept any child with any kind of diagnosis. And if you file this complaint, your child will never be accepted into another private school. Nothing screams PITA like litigation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

[/quote=Anonymous]

I think your child was counseled out appropriately. It wasn't done because your family receives aid it was because the school can't meet his needs.

Other kids might behave badly but if it's just crappy behavior of a NT kid that is something different than a child with autism.

We are a financial aid family at a private school and we sacrifice a lot to pay our portion of the tuition. We do it because our public options are bad and quite frankly I expect the school to maintain a student body that they can reasonably serve academically and behavior wise without taking away from my child.

[/quote=Anonymous]



I agree that it was appropriate for my child to be counseled out. The WAY that they counseled him out was reprehensible. Some of the things that the staff said about him and TO him were demeaning and cruel. They let other children tease and humiliate him. This was at the same time they were singing their own praises about the caring, family-like feel of the school, and how they could turn children around by believing in them, and individualizing to meet their needs.

How do YOU know it had nothing to do with financial aid? You have no idea what school it even was; I was deeply involved for years.

To answer another PP's question, we moved to a better school district, and ds is happy in public school.

I think we were counseled out of a parochial because we were not Catholic. We were paying the Prot. rate (more money) but the school was undergoing management problems and kids were falling through cracks. But we were shabbily treated and and I think a lot of it - and the nastiness of the teachers and administrators - was due to the fact that they were Catholic and were were not. Which is why I will never become a Catholic nor will be children. So you parochials did a really super job of being inclusive and encouraging other Christians to take that step to become CAtholic.

I am very sorry. My kids attend a Catholic parochial/are Catholic and we would never treat you like that.

[Anonymous]

Oh I'm way to exhausted to be frothing.
There absolutely have been cases where private schools have been cited for non-compliance of Title III of the ADA
http://www.ada.gov/nobel_learning.htm
For ADA purposes a disability doesn't have to be in the DSM-V, but it does have to be diagnosed by an OT, PT, or educational psychologist. (Otherwise, people could just make up any diagnosis they want.)
In my daughter's case, she also has hypotonia, a medical diagnosis, which affects the ability to sit upright at a desk and also affects writing, but the ADA has just issued a recommendation that the definition of the disability NOT be too rigid, that the focus be on assisting the child rather than questioning the legitimacy of the disability.
I won't be suing, I'll be making a complaint to the Department of Justice--it's a little different.
Anyhow, I'll let you know how it turns out! Even if they decide not to investigate or don't rule in my favor.
http://www.ldonline.org/article/6108/
http://www.ldonline.org/legalbriefs/c682/#34
Can a private school refuse to accommodate a child with a disability?
Our child is going to a private school and has a reading difference. We are doing everything they ask. They have said they cannot accommodate her next year. We said we will do whatever it takes to keep her there. We all love this school. Also, she has a twin sister who is doing well. They are in second grade. Do we have any recourse legal or otherwise under No Child Left Behind?
Your question addresses the decision by the private school that your child attends, that they can not accommodate her and will not allow her to return next year. Under the Americans with Disability Act, private schools or places of public accommodation must refrain from public discrimination and provide "reasonable" accommodations to persons with disabilities. The only exception for private schools is for those that are religiously controlled, in which case the Federal disability rights laws do not apply.
However, in some states and localities, state and local disability rights laws do apply to religiously controlled private schools, which may also be a source of protection. However, the fact that your child has a disability and is entitled to reasonable accommodations it is not something that is an automatic entitlement.
Rather, you must provide documentation of the disability, request formal accommodation, and give the school an opportunity to respond. If they determine that the accommodation is unreasonable, they may refuse it. You have the right to appeal these decisions, both with the school and

[Anonymous]

Can some of the above posters actually name some of the schools you discussed above if you are comfortable? While I think sometimes school placement sometimes doesn't work out even with both the families and the schools trying hard and having good intentions, the school's reactions regardless whether or not the child is a good fit is unprofessional and meanspirited to say the least. They could have had a frank discussion with the parents and say we"ll try this strategy for a certain amount of time, the parent gets appropriate help for their child as well. If the situation does not improve, then work with the parent to find a more appropriate placement. In terms of the other children getting away with mean behavior, I think that reflects more on parental involvement and school culture. If children are in an environment where there are no consequences for picking on the weaker or different, then that reflects very poorly on that school environment, and I think it would be good to avoid it.

[Anonymous]

I don't want to mention our school until all this has been settled. But I promise I will at some point, when I give you all an update.
I think private schools should have to provide statistics on the percentage of students they "counsel out." Apparently my daughter's school has the highest rate in the area--if I had known that, I never would have sent her there. If you're looking to "cull the herd" my daughter will be the first to go. She's uncoordinated, can't run fast, she cries easily--all things that inspire bullying in both kids and adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

[/quote=Anonymous]

I think your child was counseled out appropriately. It wasn't done because your family receives aid it was because the school can't meet his needs.

Other kids might behave badly but if it's just crappy behavior of a NT kid that is something different than a child with autism.

We are a financial aid family at a private school and we sacrifice a lot to pay our portion of the tuition. We do it because our public options are bad and quite frankly I expect the school to maintain a student body that they can reasonably serve academically and behavior wise without taking away from my child.

[/quote=Anonymous]



I agree that it was appropriate for my child to be counseled out. The WAY that they counseled him out was reprehensible. Some of the things that the staff said about him and TO him were demeaning and cruel. They let other children tease and humiliate him. This was at the same time they were singing their own praises about the caring, family-like feel of the school, and how they could turn children around by believing in them, and individualizing to meet their needs.

How do YOU know it had nothing to do with financial aid? You have no idea what school it even was; I was deeply involved for years.

To answer another PP's question, we moved to a better school district, and ds is happy in public school.

Maybe, maybe not.

A child who has difficultly knowing social boundaries and may have trouble regulation emotional responses may over react emotionally to something that had not intention of being demeaning and cruel. And parents who receive who have received a tough to hear diagnosis may also be over emotional to any perceived criticism.

And as far as financial aid not being a factor, it doesn't take genius - for the best case scenario we take a Big 3 with a tuition price tag of $32K and financial aid of 90%. Your kid leaves so they possibly recoup $28K. That amount is not going to make or break any school that is in decent financial shape in the DC metro area. On the flip side, if your child is full pay, they don't care as much either because they will just get another full pay child to take his spot.

You said your were deeply involved in the school - so I would actually tend to believe that they didn't like you and didn't like your kid somewhat but you were really the tipping point. That's what I have personally seen in my experience of private school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't want to mention our school until all this has been settled. But I promise I will at some point, when I give you all an update.
I think private schools should have to provide statistics on the percentage of students they "counsel out." Apparently my daughter's school has the highest rate in the area--if I had known that, I never would have sent her there. If you're looking to "cull the herd" my daughter will be the first to go. She's uncoordinated, can't run fast, she cries easily--all things that inspire bullying in both kids and adults.

If you "settle", you normally are not allowed to reveal the specifics of the case. Posting here with a follow up that you have settled might breach such an agreement. It would be worth mentioning to your attorney prior to signing any settlement.

[Anonymous]

Thank you for that advice about not mentioning the school. I don't want to settle anything, or any amount of money, but it's still good to keep in mind.
The only thing I want is for my daughter's teacher and the school's administrators to write essays on why they are sorry they violated the ADA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

[/quote=Anonymous]

I think your child was counseled out appropriately. It wasn't done because your family receives aid it was because the school can't meet his needs.

Other kids might behave badly but if it's just crappy behavior of a NT kid that is something different than a child with autism.

We are a financial aid family at a private school and we sacrifice a lot to pay our portion of the tuition. We do it because our public options are bad and quite frankly I expect the school to maintain a student body that they can reasonably serve academically and behavior wise without taking away from my child.

[/quote=Anonymous]



I agree that it was appropriate for my child to be counseled out. The WAY that they counseled him out was reprehensible. Some of the things that the staff said about him and TO him were demeaning and cruel. They let other children tease and humiliate him. This was at the same time they were singing their own praises about the caring, family-like feel of the school, and how they could turn children around by believing in them, and individualizing to meet their needs.

How do YOU know it had nothing to do with financial aid? You have no idea what school it even was; I was deeply involved for years.

To answer another PP's question, we moved to a better school district, and ds is happy in public school.

Maybe, maybe not.

A child who has difficultly knowing social boundaries and may have trouble regulation emotional responses may over react emotionally to something that had not intention of being demeaning and cruel. And parents who receive who have received a tough to hear diagnosis may also be over emotional to any perceived criticism.

And as far as financial aid not being a factor, it doesn't take genius - for the best case scenario we take a Big 3 with a tuition price tag of $32K and financial aid of 90%. Your kid leaves so they possibly recoup $28K. That amount is not going to make or break any school that is in decent financial shape in the DC metro area. On the flip side, if your child is full pay, they don't care as much either because they will just get another full pay child to take his spot.

You said your were deeply involved in the school - so I would actually tend to believe that they didn't like you and didn't like your kid somewhat but you were really the tipping point. That's what I have personally seen in my experience of private school.

Well, I'm not going to get into specifics, because I've possibly already said too much to remain anonymous. But for what it's worth, ds is a very accurate reporter. Also, most of the "demeaning and cruel" did not come through ds. I saw it myself, or heard it from parents, teachers, and students. Back then, he didn't even have a diagnosis for me to overreact to.

You're right, I don't know for sure that FA was a factor, but the school was NOT flush with money or applicants. As an aside, we got nowhere near 90%, lol.

I also can't prove that the school liked me-- especially not without identifying specifics-- but if they didn't like me, they did a great job hiding it! They wanted to keep me, and my other dc, but not ds.

[Anonymous]

I hate to break it to you but I really don't think the ADA plays a role here. Private schools are not required to accommodate children they don't feel they can teach. That may change some day but for now I think any lawsuit you file will be thrown out.

[Anonymous]

... the school was NOT flush with money or applicants ...

New poster. Is it the OP writing about how her son was counseled out? If so, I struggle a little with the disconnect between the thread title referring to a "top private," and the idea that the school is struggling for applicants.

[Anonymous]

And again:
ADA lawsuit against private school chain
http://www.ada.gov/nobel_learning.htm

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe you, PP whose child was targeted.

We didn't get counseled out, but withdrew our children voluntarily because of a bullying situation. The teacher decided that our ds was a problem child because he cried too easily. Well, he cried because he was being tortured by other kids.

The administration finally figured it out, but we had already decided to leave. So now that school is stuck with a terrible bully, one who continues (according to multiple friends) on a destructive path. The school says the bully deserves another chance. Whatever. My kid is no longer the target, and his frequent crying is a thing of the past.

Well I'm sure the bully pays full tuition and OP's family could have stayed if they did.

I posted the story about my ds. I don't think it necessarily works that way. FA might have been a factor, but you also don't know what sort of relationship the bully's parents have with the school.

FWIW, our school lost both of my children, and we are a full-pay family.

[Anonymous]

Another private school lawsuit:
http://www.leagle.com/decision/19971561964FSupp597_11472.xml/BERCOVITCH%20v.%20BALDWIN%20SCHOOL

4. WHETHER THE PUBLIC INTEREST WOULD BE ADVANCED BY THE ISSUANCE OF AN INJUNCTION
It is evidently in the public interest to guarantee that children with disabilities such as Jason's be reasonably accommodated in the schools which they attend prior to subjecting them to specialized education. Mainstream solutions should be explored prior to specialized ones. Students with ADHD need continuance in their lives; and keeping them in regular schools raises their self esteem and makes them feel that they are "just like the rest". This is precisely the mission of the Americans with Disabilities Act: to help prevent those with disabilities from being segregated from the remaining population if, with or without a reasonable accommodation. they are able to perform the duties required of them in their place of public accommodation. 42 U.S.C. § 12101.