Son marrying a woman with no career

[Anonymous]

Is it money or career that bothers you?

My son's girlfriend is getting her PHD in art history. She said she would never make more than 50K in her life. I found it refreshing.

[Anonymous]

My son is still a teen but I am planning to talk to him about opening a separate account in my name and putting part of his earnings there. It will be mine on paper but de facto it will be his to invest or spend the way he sees fit. It can be framed as parental support or something like that so that it’s not part of the divorce settlement. That way he doesn’t have to have an uncomfortable conversation about a prenup but he is also protected if something happens.
So no, if he agreed I would be ok with a DIL like you described.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son is still a teen but I am planning to talk to him about opening a separate account in my name and putting part of his earnings there. It will be mine on paper but de facto it will be his to invest or spend the way he sees fit. It can be framed as parental support or something like that so that it’s not part of the divorce settlement. That way he doesn’t have to have an uncomfortable conversation about a prenup but he is also protected if something happens.
So no, if he agreed I would be ok with a DIL like you described.

This cannot be real.

[Anonymous]

I would accept it if he loved her and she loved him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Is it money or career that bothers you?

My son's girlfriend is getting her PHD in art history. She said she would never make more than 50K in her life. I found it refreshing.

This was me. I have 2 masters degrees but no real career. I patched things together and came up with about the same amount (adjusted for inflation) . DH is a fed. He has a degree from a Service Academy but no masters.We camped all over Europe and the US for vacations. Our daughter is now grown with a degree in art history. She has traveled everywhere with us. DH and I still live in same 1100 sq ft house we bought in our late 20s.

Best of all we still laugh together and love each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend who made well over 550K a year when single only wanted to date women no career who would to be a great Mom.

He married a nice girl who worked in a department store who did go to college.

They live in a mansion and have three great looking kids. He had plenty of cash. He just needed someone to be there to run house.

How 1950!

So he was not seeking a partner or equal, he was seeking a housekeeper/nanny?

To be fair, without a spouse and kids, men or women rarely need housekeeping or babysitting, they tend to live carefree lives in small condos and have money to hire help. To build a family together, they've to pool their physical, mental and financial resources to manage. Neither is doing other a favor or service, that's a stupid argument.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She sounds great. Late 20s doesn't have to have a career or money of her own. She loves him and he loves her? That is all you can ask for.

Why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Is it money or career that bothers you?

My son's girlfriend is getting her PHD in art history. She said she would never make more than 50K in her life. I found it refreshing.

Possibly it’s just lack of any fire/ambition while young.

There are of course a number of Art History PhD’s that make more than $50k…my cousin who is a university professor is one. Not that they are getting filthy rich, but they now have tenure.

I get that jobs in Art History that pay a ton aren’t just sitting there…but it seems odd to aim low at so young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Is it money or career that bothers you?

My son's girlfriend is getting her PHD in art history. She said she would never make more than 50K in her life. I found it refreshing.

Possibly it’s just lack of any fire/ambition while young.

There are of course a number of Art History PhD’s that make more than $50k…my cousin who is a university professor is one. Not that they are getting filthy rich, but they now have tenure.

I get that jobs in Art History that pay a ton aren’t just sitting there…but it seems odd to aim low at so young.

DP. I think it’s hyperbole. My spouse works in an art museum and with only a bachelor’s degree and makes over $50K. Those with PhDs in art history definitely make more than that, but under $100K.

[Anonymous]

This will be my son. I hope future in-laws don’t judge him for his highly-educated but not financially lucrative career choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How would you feel about your son (who has a semi lucrative career but nothing crazy) marrying a woman who is college educated but makes close to minimum wage in her late 20’s? This is my son. She’s pretty and nice but has no career or money of her own. They’re both the same age.

MYOB

[Anonymous]

Ah. This brings back memories. Of the BF's dad and stepmom who warned him that I was "a nobody" who was "beautiful but going nowhere." The bf was selling houses (new home sales, didn't even have a realtor's license) for context.

I was trying to figure out what to do in my late 20s and was modeling a tiny bit (I never got much work, but got some) and cocktail waitressing in a club on weekends. After he broke up with me I ended up going to law school, have had an amazing career, and made a lot of money. He's now divorced from a woman he met at a Pizza Hut and has had a string of long-term GFs since, none of them particularly impressive career-wise. I follow it on FB and laugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ah. This brings back memories. Of the BF's dad and stepmom who warned him that I was "a nobody" who was "beautiful but going nowhere." The bf was selling houses (new home sales, didn't even have a realtor's license) for context.

I was trying to figure out what to do in my late 20s and was modeling a tiny bit (I never got much work, but got some) and cocktail waitressing in a club on weekends. After he broke up with me I ended up going to law school, have had an amazing career, and made a lot of money. He's now divorced from a woman he met at a Pizza Hut and has had a string of long-term GFs since, none of them particularly impressive career-wise. I follow it on FB and laugh.

My niece has been modeling since toddler-hood and at 27 owns a house in LA. No college. Straight A's from private school K-12. Her mom (my gorgeous sister) paid for that schooling with her cocktail waitressing job in Vegas. She has 160 college credits, 3.8GPA while working full-time but no degree.

Some people have no clue there are imaginative ways of life to be successful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ah. This brings back memories. Of the BF's dad and stepmom who warned him that I was "a nobody" who was "beautiful but going nowhere." The bf was selling houses (new home sales, didn't even have a realtor's license) for context.

I was trying to figure out what to do in my late 20s and was modeling a tiny bit (I never got much work, but got some) and cocktail waitressing in a club on weekends. After he broke up with me I ended up going to law school, have had an amazing career, and made a lot of money. He's now divorced from a woman he met at a Pizza Hut and has had a string of long-term GFs since, none of them particularly impressive career-wise. I follow it on FB and laugh.

My niece has been modeling since toddler-hood and at 27 owns a house in LA. No college. Straight A's from private school K-12. Her mom (my gorgeous sister) paid for that schooling with her cocktail waitressing job in Vegas. She has 160 college credits, 3.8GPA while working full-time but no degree.

Some people have no clue there are imaginative ways of life to be successful.

I don’t understand the comment.

Everyone knows you can become a multi millionaire as an actor, but less than 1% achieve that status.

Same for musicians, models and other similar professions. College doesn’t help you in any way in these professions, so nobody cares about it.

I will comment that rarely do successful artists want their kids to pursue the same path with no college. Hence why Paltrow’s kids are in college…Affleck’s kids…etc.

They realize how hard a business it is and how unique a person you need to be successful.

[Anonymous]

College is always there if you feel you need it. Ho-hum.

Take advantage of your beauty, talent, and brains while you are young.

Gifts.