Morning bike to school has become drama

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can see a #boymom reply posts a mile away.

Boys don't care if one girl who may have been a matchmaker rides a bike near them. If they want to drop their friend because of it, they are a bunch of clowns and the OP's daughter is better off finding friends that are loyal or nonchalant about this kinda stuff.

And the fact is, no one knows the true story of any of this because everything in middle school is blown out of proportion or completely made-up. The fact that parents fall into this and care so much is pretty funny.

There is one obsessed poster who keeps using #boymom as an insult and then the rest of us who are intelligent enough to realize that a child of any gender should not be forced to hang out with another child who has done things to make them uncomfortable just for the sake of inclusivity. I have a son and a daughter. If someone annoys them about dating and crushes and stuff that feels awkward and age inappropriate for them, I will back their decision not to make plans with that person. Some of us are actually good parents who know how to respect our child’s feelings and autonomy about who makes them uncomfortable.

I do teach my children to be kind. These boys should not bully this girl. But the genders don’t really matter. It could be one boy making other boys uncomfortable or a girl making other girls uncomfortable. Nobody has to disregard their own comfort just because they are a boy or a girl.

What is ironic is that the #boymom poster is the one making this all about gender when it’s really not. She sounds like a bitter man-hater who is going to blame everything on a child being a boy, which is pretty gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can see a #boymom reply posts a mile away.

Boys don't care if one girl who may have been a matchmaker rides a bike near them. If they want to drop their friend because of it, they are a bunch of clowns and the OP's daughter is better off finding friends that are loyal or nonchalant about this kinda stuff.

And the fact is, no one knows the true story of any of this because everything in middle school is blown out of proportion or completely made-up. The fact that parents fall into this and care so much is pretty funny.

There is one obsessed poster who keeps using #boymom as an insult and then the rest of us who are intelligent enough to realize that a child of any gender should not be forced to hang out with another child who has done things to make them uncomfortable just for the sake of inclusivity. I have a son and a daughter. If someone annoys them about dating and crushes and stuff that feels awkward and age inappropriate for them, I will back their decision not to make plans with that person. Some of us are actually good parents who know how to respect our child’s feelings and autonomy about who makes them uncomfortable.

I do teach my children to be kind. These boys should not bully this girl. But the genders don’t really matter. It could be one boy making other boys uncomfortable or a girl making other girls uncomfortable. Nobody has to disregard their own comfort just because they are a boy or a girl.

What is ironic is that the #boymom poster is the one making this all about gender when it’s really not. She sounds like a bitter man-hater who is going to blame everything on a child being a boy, which is pretty gross.

DP. I agree that it’s not about gender, but those boys are inappropriately singling out this girl. She’s just ONE MORE kid who can be annoying; and ironically, the kids and adults who think that she deserves to be bullied(through relational aggression) because of it, are usually annoying themselves and would be bullied too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can see a #boymom reply posts a mile away.

Boys don't care if one girl who may have been a matchmaker rides a bike near them. If they want to drop their friend because of it, they are a bunch of clowns and the OP's daughter is better off finding friends that are loyal or nonchalant about this kinda stuff.

And the fact is, no one knows the true story of any of this because everything in middle school is blown out of proportion or completely made-up. The fact that parents fall into this and care so much is pretty funny.

There is one obsessed poster who keeps using #boymom as an insult and then the rest of us who are intelligent enough to realize that a child of any gender should not be forced to hang out with another child who has done things to make them uncomfortable just for the sake of inclusivity. I have a son and a daughter. If someone annoys them about dating and crushes and stuff that feels awkward and age inappropriate for them, I will back their decision not to make plans with that person. Some of us are actually good parents who know how to respect our child’s feelings and autonomy about who makes them uncomfortable.

I do teach my children to be kind. These boys should not bully this girl. But the genders don’t really matter. It could be one boy making other boys uncomfortable or a girl making other girls uncomfortable. Nobody has to disregard their own comfort just because they are a boy or a girl.

What is ironic is that the #boymom poster is the one making this all about gender when it’s really not. She sounds like a bitter man-hater who is going to blame everything on a child being a boy, which is pretty gross.

DP. I agree that it’s not about gender, but those boys are inappropriately singling out this girl. She’s just ONE MORE kid who can be annoying; and ironically, the kids and adults who think that she deserves to be bullied(through relational aggression) because of it, are usually annoying themselves and would be bullied too.

They have valid reasons for "singling" her out. She has done something and now there are consequences. It almost sounds like she was the bully and the boys distanced themselves. This is how kids learn to socialize.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can see a #boymom reply posts a mile away.

Boys don't care if one girl who may have been a matchmaker rides a bike near them. If they want to drop their friend because of it, they are a bunch of clowns and the OP's daughter is better off finding friends that are loyal or nonchalant about this kinda stuff.

And the fact is, no one knows the true story of any of this because everything in middle school is blown out of proportion or completely made-up. The fact that parents fall into this and care so much is pretty funny.

There is one obsessed poster who keeps using #boymom as an insult and then the rest of us who are intelligent enough to realize that a child of any gender should not be forced to hang out with another child who has done things to make them uncomfortable just for the sake of inclusivity. I have a son and a daughter. If someone annoys them about dating and crushes and stuff that feels awkward and age inappropriate for them, I will back their decision not to make plans with that person. Some of us are actually good parents who know how to respect our child’s feelings and autonomy about who makes them uncomfortable.

I do teach my children to be kind. These boys should not bully this girl. But the genders don’t really matter. It could be one boy making other boys uncomfortable or a girl making other girls uncomfortable. Nobody has to disregard their own comfort just because they are a boy or a girl.

What is ironic is that the #boymom poster is the one making this all about gender when it’s really not. She sounds like a bitter man-hater who is going to blame everything on a child being a boy, which is pretty gross.

DP. I agree that it’s not about gender, but those boys are inappropriately singling out this girl. She’s just ONE MORE kid who can be annoying; and ironically, the kids and adults who think that she deserves to be bullied(through relational aggression) because of it, are usually annoying themselves and would be bullied too.

They have valid reasons for "singling" her out. She has done something and now there are consequences. It almost sounds like she was the bully and the boys distanced themselves. This is how kids learn to socialize.

Wrong. She did something mild and different “rules” are being applied to her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can see a #boymom reply posts a mile away.

Boys don't care if one girl who may have been a matchmaker rides a bike near them. If they want to drop their friend because of it, they are a bunch of clowns and the OP's daughter is better off finding friends that are loyal or nonchalant about this kinda stuff.

And the fact is, no one knows the true story of any of this because everything in middle school is blown out of proportion or completely made-up. The fact that parents fall into this and care so much is pretty funny.

There is one obsessed poster who keeps using #boymom as an insult and then the rest of us who are intelligent enough to realize that a child of any gender should not be forced to hang out with another child who has done things to make them uncomfortable just for the sake of inclusivity. I have a son and a daughter. If someone annoys them about dating and crushes and stuff that feels awkward and age inappropriate for them, I will back their decision not to make plans with that person. Some of us are actually good parents who know how to respect our child’s feelings and autonomy about who makes them uncomfortable.

I do teach my children to be kind. These boys should not bully this girl. But the genders don’t really matter. It could be one boy making other boys uncomfortable or a girl making other girls uncomfortable. Nobody has to disregard their own comfort just because they are a boy or a girl.

What is ironic is that the #boymom poster is the one making this all about gender when it’s really not. She sounds like a bitter man-hater who is going to blame everything on a child being a boy, which is pretty gross.

DP. I agree that it’s not about gender, but those boys are inappropriately singling out this girl. She’s just ONE MORE kid who can be annoying; and ironically, the kids and adults who think that she deserves to be bullied(through relational aggression) because of it, are usually annoying themselves and would be bullied too.

They have valid reasons for "singling" her out. She has done something and now there are consequences. It almost sounds like she was the bully and the boys distanced themselves. This is how kids learn to socialize.

Wrong. She did something mild and different “rules” are being applied to her.

Please tell us exactly what she did so we can all decide.

[Anonymous]

Perfect teaching moment! Tell her it’s wrong for boys to be mean to her friend and she should ride with her friend and maybe teach the boys a lesson in kindness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Perfect teaching moment! Tell her it’s wrong for boys to be mean to her friend and she should ride with her friend and maybe teach the boys a lesson in kindness.

Again, totally missing the point. The boys have done nothing to the friend. It's OPs daughter who feels wronged. The boys have never ridden with the other girl, so they aren't doing anything to her. But they are now no longer riding with OPs daughter b/c she wants to add this girl they don't like for the reasons OP said. And she feels like her friends ditched her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Perfect teaching moment! Tell her it’s wrong for boys to be mean to her friend and she should ride with her friend and maybe teach the boys a lesson in kindness.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perfect teaching moment! Tell her it’s wrong for boys to be mean to her friend and she should ride with her friend and maybe teach the boys a lesson in kindness.

+1

How does any of this fix the daughters hurt feelings about her friends not being her friends?

[Anonymous]

Dump the girl and go back with the guy friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dump the girl and go back with the guy friends.

Seriously this. Matchmaking girl is total drama. Just wait until she starts making up /causing more drama with OP’s kid.

[Anonymous]

Have the boys said she can’t go with them or is your daughter just assuming bc she knows they don’t like her?

Unless something specific happened between these kids (like used to be “dating” or the girl did something mean to one), I don’t find that most boys will go as far as to say someone can’t come along that they don’t like. That’s more a girl thing - and your daughter may be assuming they will have a problem with it. But most teenage boys just aren’t that deep. lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perfect teaching moment! Tell her it’s wrong for boys to be mean to her friend and she should ride with her friend and maybe teach the boys a lesson in kindness.

Again, totally missing the point. The boys have done nothing to the friend. It's OPs daughter who feels wronged. The boys have never ridden with the other girl, so they aren't doing anything to her. But they are now no longer riding with OPs daughter b/c she wants to add this girl they don't like for the reasons OP said. And she feels like her friends ditched her.

The boys dumped her. They aren’t good friends. The end

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perfect teaching moment! Tell her it’s wrong for boys to be mean to her friend and she should ride with her friend and maybe teach the boys a lesson in kindness.

Again, totally missing the point. The boys have done nothing to the friend. It's OPs daughter who feels wronged. The boys have never ridden with the other girl, so they aren't doing anything to her. But they are now no longer riding with OPs daughter b/c she wants to add this girl they don't like for the reasons OP said. And she feels like her friends ditched her.

The boys dumped her. They aren’t good friends. The end

+1

[Anonymous]

This is the most ridiculous thing I've read in a long time. You don't have to be friends with everyone. If the boys didn't want to ride with this other girl they shouldn't have to. Why would you force yourself into a friend group?
I tell my kids you try to be kind but that doesn't mean you're friends with everyone.