Driving teenagers from a party to another house after they have been drinking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The fact that OP is using the word "tipsy" for 17 year olds who have their own cars pretty much tells us all we need to know.

What do you think comes between sober and drunk

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel sad for parents who feel like they have to act okay with this.

Yeah, much better to punish them and ensure that next time, they get in the car drunk to avoid your wrath.

Not punish. Just not allow them at that particular house again. And keep a closer eye on those friends. It’s disgusting how people try to normalize teen drinking. I did not drink as a teen and had plenty of friends who did not either.

So you never had a drink even in college as a freshman or sophomore when you are still a teen?

There are many, many people who did recreational drinking in the late teen years and nothing much came from it and they are not adults with a drinking problem. That would be...every single person I was friends with in college. There is some middle ground here. Talk to your kids about how to be responsible with alcohol.

This is kind of the equivalent of only pushing sex abstinence to me. Just disconnected from reality and doing more harm than good.

I personally see a huge difference between HS and college and also between a custodial parent condoning them behavior and an independent adult doing it away from home.

You do you! But it’s false to assume all teens graduate HS drinking on the regular.

I agree with you. High school is different than college. And also the original comment was "I did not drink as a teen and had plenty of friends who did not either." That includes two years of college for most kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that OP is using the word "tipsy" for 17 year olds who have their own cars pretty much tells us all we need to know.

What do you think comes between sober and drunk

Np. Aren't there blood tests for this? Perhaps OP would have been surprised by actual numbers of the kids' alcohol levels.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that OP is using the word "tipsy" for 17 year olds who have their own cars pretty much tells us all we need to know.

What do you think comes between sober and drunk

Np. Aren't there blood tests for this? Perhaps OP would have been surprised by actual numbers of the kids' alcohol levels.

Pp. Tipsy and drunk are descriptions of behavior some people are drunk after to glasses of wine someone else with the same bac might just be tipsy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at the number of people okay with having drunk teens dropped off at their house.

Agree. Posters need to flip the script on this one. You told your child he could have friends spend the night. OP drops them off and drives away, they stumble in, and you realize, crap! I have a house full of underaged intoxicated kids. Now what?

Worse, you didn't give permission, and you aren't even home, but there are bunch of drunk teens "sleeping" at your house.

Tipsy is different than drunk, to me. But maybe the OP is downplaying how much they had.

Tipsy is drunk and there's no legal amount of alcohol for a minor.

This is the bottom line. And who exactly provided the alcohol to minors?

They all have fake IDs

Not likely look at half the parents in the thread would be happy to provide alcohol.

But I agree further questions need to be asked.

Please point out in this thread where any parent said they would be happy to provide alcohol!!

[Anonymous]

Tipsy is the polite, less offensive way of saying drunk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that OP is using the word "tipsy" for 17 year olds who have their own cars pretty much tells us all we need to know.

What do you think comes between sober and drunk

Illegal underaged drinking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you collect all their car keys?
Did you tell the parents at the house where you dropped them off?
Were there sober and aware adults at the house where you left the impaired teenagers?

The missing piece here is that just getting him to call instead of drive is a win, but not the end game. They call you so you can get them home safely and praise them for calling.

This isn't about "punishing them" as other posters are saying. But when you left them, they were impaired and not safely home. This is why you are feeling uneasy and asking if you did the right thing. Your gut is telling you you didn't. Why is that? Were you up all night hoping they stayed where you left them and didn't drink more?

So, they weren't all safely home, and you dumped a liability onto the other parents without telling them. Were they even home? Anything could have happened after that, and you were the adult in charge who could have prevented it. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I think you already know this is why you are feeling uneasy.

I personally think "adult in charge" probably isn't the best way of thinking about late teens your primary role should be guidance at this point

In this situation? Then why are they calling you at all?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you collect all their car keys?
Did you tell the parents at the house where you dropped them off?
Were there sober and aware adults at the house where you left the impaired teenagers?

The missing piece here is that just getting him to call instead of drive is a win, but not the end game. They call you so you can get them home safely and praise them for calling.

This isn't about "punishing them" as other posters are saying. But when you left them, they were impaired and not safely home. This is why you are feeling uneasy and asking if you did the right thing. Your gut is telling you you didn't. Why is that? Were you up all night hoping they stayed where you left them and didn't drink more?

So, they weren't all safely home, and you dumped a liability onto the other parents without telling them. Were they even home? Anything could have happened after that, and you were the adult in charge who could have prevented it. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I think you already know this is why you are feeling uneasy.

I personally think "adult in charge" probably isn't the best way of thinking about late teens your primary role should be guidance at this point

Do you think the "tipsy" 17 year old boys who called their mommies were in charge?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you collect all their car keys?
Did you tell the parents at the house where you dropped them off?
Were there sober and aware adults at the house where you left the impaired teenagers?

The missing piece here is that just getting him to call instead of drive is a win, but not the end game. They call you so you can get them home safely and praise them for calling.

This isn't about "punishing them" as other posters are saying. But when you left them, they were impaired and not safely home. This is why you are feeling uneasy and asking if you did the right thing. Your gut is telling you you didn't. Why is that? Were you up all night hoping they stayed where you left them and didn't drink more?

So, they weren't all safely home, and you dumped a liability onto the other parents without telling them. Were they even home? Anything could have happened after that, and you were the adult in charge who could have prevented it. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I think you already know this is why you are feeling uneasy.

I personally think "adult in charge" probably isn't the best way of thinking about late teens your primary role should be guidance at this point

In this situation? Then why are they calling you at all?

Because you have a car and are willing to drive them ,I would have told them to call a Lyft and gone back to sleep

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at the number of people okay with having drunk teens dropped off at their house.

Agree. Posters need to flip the script on this one. You told your child he could have friends spend the night. OP drops them off and drives away, they stumble in, and you realize, crap! I have a house full of underaged intoxicated kids. Now what?

Worse, you didn't give permission, and you aren't even home, but there are bunch of drunk teens "sleeping" at your house.

Tipsy is different than drunk, to me. But maybe the OP is downplaying how much they had.

Tipsy is drunk and there's no legal amount of alcohol for a minor.

This is the bottom line. And who exactly provided the alcohol to minors?

They all have fake IDs

Not likely look at half the parents in the thread would be happy to provide alcohol.

But I agree further questions need to be asked.

Please point out in this thread where any parent said they would be happy to provide alcohol!!

Stop acting like there is some huge moral difference between providing it and “just” allowing it. I agree that there is a legal difference, but morally it is the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at the number of people okay with having drunk teens dropped off at their house.

Agree. Posters need to flip the script on this one. You told your child he could have friends spend the night. OP drops them off and drives away, they stumble in, and you realize, crap! I have a house full of underaged intoxicated kids. Now what?

Worse, you didn't give permission, and you aren't even home, but there are bunch of drunk teens "sleeping" at your house.

Tipsy is different than drunk, to me. But maybe the OP is downplaying how much they had.

Tipsy is drunk and there's no legal amount of alcohol for a minor.

This is the bottom line. And who exactly provided the alcohol to minors?

They all have fake IDs

Not likely look at half the parents in the thread would be happy to provide alcohol.

But I agree further questions need to be asked.

Not at all . I know Parents and either kids drink or would drive them in the situation he would never provide alcohol. There’s a big difference between being realistic and being “the call mom”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel sad for parents who feel like they have to act okay with this.

Yeah, much better to punish them and ensure that next time, they get in the car drunk to avoid your wrath.

Not punish. Just not allow them at that particular house again. And keep a closer eye on those friends. It’s disgusting how people try to normalize teen drinking. I did not drink as a teen and had plenty of friends who did not either.

So you never had a drink even in college as a freshman or sophomore when you are still a teen?

There are many, many people who did recreational drinking in the late teen years and nothing much came from it and they are not adults with a drinking problem. That would be...every single person I was friends with in college. There is some middle ground here. Talk to your kids about how to be responsible with alcohol.

This is kind of the equivalent of only pushing sex abstinence to me. Just disconnected from reality and doing more harm than good.

I personally see a huge difference between HS and college and also between a custodial parent condoning them behavior and an independent adult doing it away from home.

You do you! But it’s false to assume all teens graduate HS drinking on the regular.

It’s 75% that drink by HS graduation.


I also think it’s extremely irresponsible to send child college was never once experienced alcohol in a safe area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some kids just aren't really to go away to college.

These kids clearly are

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at the number of people okay with having drunk teens dropped off at their house.

Agree. Posters need to flip the script on this one. You told your child he could have friends spend the night. OP drops them off and drives away, they stumble in, and you realize, crap! I have a house full of underaged intoxicated kids. Now what?

Worse, you didn't give permission, and you aren't even home, but there are bunch of drunk teens "sleeping" at your house.

Tipsy is different than drunk, to me. But maybe the OP is downplaying how much they had.

Tipsy is drunk and there's no legal amount of alcohol for a minor.

This is the bottom line. And who exactly provided the alcohol to minors?

They all have fake IDs

Not likely look at half the parents in the thread would be happy to provide alcohol.

But I agree further questions need to be asked.

Please point out in this thread where any parent said they would be happy to provide alcohol!!

Stop acting like there is some huge moral difference between providing it and “just” allowing it. I agree that there is a legal difference, but morally it is the same.

I actually think it’s morally and correct to send a child to college was never experienced alcohol. Is extremely dangerous. And morally wrong