Survey: rejection

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely no issues matching with our preferred Northern Europeans. I actually feel like we are in the drivers seat. We have APs chasing us around after interviews. Here is our profile:

2 school aged kids
Treat stipend as a minimum and pay fed minimum wage if over 27.5hrs
Dedicated car
Live in Ashburn
Fed holidays off
3 weeks in summer off
1 week Christmas off
Spring break off
Basement suite
Smartphone
Membership at lifetime fitness.


I realize our package is desirable and outside the norm. However, I want a great AP who values her job and wants to keep it. I want my pick of AuPairs and dont want to settle. I don't want drama. I want a very solid driver. We so far have had great luck and have truly had girls who value their jobs. They all know exactly how other APs are treated to the bare minimum and know via social media that our gig is a good one.

Um, WHY would that be an incentive? Ew. Sorry, but it is so far from...everything. That said, we offer the same, and I pay another $100 b/c our child has SN and can be difficult.

Oh, and we live in Bethesda and are white. No rejections even with SN child.

Ok?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely no issues matching with our preferred Northern Europeans. I actually feel like we are in the drivers seat. We have APs chasing us around after interviews. Here is our profile:

2 school aged kids
Treat stipend as a minimum and pay fed minimum wage if over 27.5hrs
Dedicated car
Live in Ashburn
Fed holidays off
3 weeks in summer off
1 week Christmas off
Spring break off
Basement suite
Smartphone
Membership at lifetime fitness.


I realize our package is desirable and outside the norm. However, I want a great AP who values her job and wants to keep it. I want my pick of AuPairs and dont want to settle. I don't want drama. I want a very solid driver. We so far have had great luck and have truly had girls who value their jobs. They all know exactly how other APs are treated to the bare minimum and know via social media that our gig is a good one.

Your gig is fine - location is terrible. May as well be middle of Kansas. APs are learning locations and that “outside of NYC” means an hour train ride.
I live in DC and never been to Ashburn; sure it is nice if I wanted to spend 2 hours one way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely no issues matching with our preferred Northern Europeans. I actually feel like we are in the drivers seat. We have APs chasing us around after interviews. Here is our profile:

2 school aged kids
Treat stipend as a minimum and pay fed minimum wage if over 27.5hrs
Dedicated car
Live in Ashburn
Fed holidays off
3 weeks in summer off
1 week Christmas off
Spring break off
Basement suite
Smartphone
Membership at lifetime fitness.


I realize our package is desirable and outside the norm. However, I want a great AP who values her job and wants to keep it. I want my pick of AuPairs and dont want to settle. I don't want drama. I want a very solid driver. We so far have had great luck and have truly had girls who value their jobs. They all know exactly how other APs are treated to the bare minimum and know via social media that our gig is a good one.

Your gig is fine - location is terrible. May as well be middle of Kansas. APs are learning locations and that “outside of NYC” means an hour train ride.
I live in DC and never been to Ashburn; sure it is nice if I wanted to spend 2 hours one way.

Ok, that is fine, but it doesnt change the fact that that poster has the upper hand in candidate selection. Thst she gets Northern Europeans and doesnt seal with rematch. Seems that your idea of what is appealing and your personal preference doesnt matter when it comes to successfully matching without difficulty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

There is something very wrong. They WANT to come to America. But with no acceptance of the diversity inherent in America and American cultures.

Germany is 80% German: https://www.worldatlas.com/articles/largest-ethnic-groups-in-germany.html

The Census has the DC as only 45% white, VA at 70%, and MD at 59% (lower if you’re looking at the white, non Hispanic/Latino percentages): https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/fact/table/md,va,dc/PST045217

Casual racism is not ok in my household. I don’t want an AP afraid to go out at night in DC because of “sketchy black people” everywhere or offhand comments about how they’ve heard “all Asians are terrible drivers”. I do want an AP interested in looking for “authentic” Mexican food or trying Ethiopian food as a new experience.

We do not rule out entire ethnicities while matching. We rule out based on abilities, characteristics, and skills. Driving is an ability not often found in Asian APs. I am hesitant about South American au pairs because I don’t want a 26yr old and they seem to skew older while the Europeans seem 18-19yrs old. My sweet spot is about 21-22 - old enough to finish college rather than a gap year. Does that mean I sometimes find and consider a 22 year old Asian AP? Yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

I"m sorry but you are racist. The end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

"I am not racist, but.........[cue very racist sentiments]"

[Anonymous]

This thread is a great explainer on why racist Americans don't think they're racist. If you're not torching a cross in my yard you won't admit you're racist even if, literally, you won't hire someone *based on their race.*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

I"m sorry but you are racist. The end.

Since when is diet considered racism? I have had (a non-disclosed) vegan and it was a total PIA. Never again will I host anyone with a dietary restriction; I am looking for an AP to help support my family - not complicate it with avoidable and known diets. Is that racists? Keep playing that card until it finally wears out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

I"m sorry but you are racist. The end.

Who is the poster racist against? The poster excludes nearly every single race.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

I"m sorry but you are racist. The end.

Since when is diet considered racism? I have had (a non-disclosed) vegan and it was a total PIA. Never again will I host anyone with a dietary restriction; I am looking for an AP to help support my family - not complicate it with avoidable and known diets. Is that racists? [b]Keep playing that card until it finally wears out.

Diet in a vacuum is not considered racist. The whole line in bold, however, is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

I"m sorry but you are racist. The end.

Since when is diet considered racism? I have had (a non-disclosed) vegan and it was a total PIA. Never again will I host anyone with a dietary restriction; I am looking for an AP to help support my family - not complicate it with avoidable and known diets. Is that racists? Keep playing that card until it finally wears out.

Diet in a vacuum is not considered racist. The whole line in bold, however, is.

[Anonymous]

I really hope that Au Pair agencies are on here so they can see some of the vitriol inherent within some host families.

[Anonymous]

I loved my 2 Brazilian APs. They were 21 and 22 when they came to me. The were from middle-middle class families, meaning they did not have a live-in housekeeper, but only a once-week one who cleaned the house. They did their own laundry and cooking. I got 2 young women who loved kids, knew how to cook, and were not afraid to keep their own room tidy. (I do have a 2x month cleaner, so the house never got too bad!)

If you are considering an AP from South America make sure to confirm what their typical lifestyle is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez people. Stop arguing this is not what this topic is about...

FWIW many rejections from girls who didn't want to be au pair for family with SAHM

Actually that is what this topic is about... if you’re not white. To pretend that race/religion/ethnicity doesn’t factor into automatic rejection is to be ignorant or in denial of your own privilege. Not up to you to silence the voices of the people of color on this thread who are dealing with this because it doesn’t affect you.

I actually dont see an issue with AuPsirs singling out people based on race. When I choose an AuPair, I will not consider Asian AuPairs, south American AuPairs, Polish, Spanish, Italian, and am hesitant to consider British, Australian and South African. I absolutely will not host a Muslim or any other person who eont eat pork, including vegetarians. Many host families also rule out entire ethnicities and there is nothing wrong with APs responding in kind.

Who in the world do you want to match with??? Germans and...French?