My NF won't leave an outdoor light on for me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
But it is NOT pitch black at 6:30am. You're welcome, problem solved. I leave for work at 6:15am everyday for work and safely get to my car parked on the street without a porch light. I'm not trying to be snarky, but OP you are starting to sound very dramatic. If your employers continue to forget, either get a flashlight or use flashlight app on our iPhone or quit. These are reasonable easy solutions. Stop being dramatic and find a solution.


I don't l be in DC. Where I live, the sun isn't up until 7:36 and it is black at 6:30.
I carry 2 bags and also have to deal with keys. Adding a flashlight to the mix is not an option.
I am not being dramatic. I am asking for appropriate lighting so I can see where I am going and so I can out the key in the lock.
Fumbling around with a flashlight or an iPhone is dangerous. Ask any self-defense expert and they will tell you that our risk of attack is increased exponentially the more you are carrying. I'm not asking for an armed escort. I just want one light.

OP, your story gets more and more unbelievable every time you post. Sunrise in every time zone in the US is between 6:22 and 6:52am at this time. It is not pitch black anywhere at 6:30 and the sun doesn't rise in the US at 7:36.

If you can't manage to carry two bags on one arm, buy yourself a grocery cart with wheels. Between that and getting your keys out in the car and buying a flashlight you can solve your problem responsibly. Grow up and solve your problem. Self efficacy is a critical quality in an adult.

If you are not a troll and a rape victim struggling with PTSD, then you should not accept jobs that trigger you. That's pretty simple to do. You are better off quitting this job than trying to make others responsible for your comfort when clearly there are options you can take yourself.

I agree with everything you said. The thing that scares me is that she is responsible for children. I can just see her now pushing the stroller in the park when a perfectly normal looking man starts walking towards them and she just bails on the stroller and runs off. =(

You are being ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

That is ridiculous. She asked for A LIGHT. EVERY FAMILY I HAVE WORKED FOR, IN 12 YEARS!!!! has left the outside light on for security, for they're own house and my safety, without being asked. This is called common sense. Just because she's asking for a light doesn't mean she has issues, is jumpy or anything other than cautious. No one should have to carry around a flashlight just because someone won't leave a light on.

[Anonymous]

*their

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That is ridiculous. She asked for A LIGHT. EVERY FAMILY I HAVE WORKED FOR, IN 12 YEARS!!!! has left the outside light on for security, for they're own house and my safety, without being asked. This is called common sense. Just because she's asking for a light doesn't mean she has issues, is jumpy or anything other than cautious. No one should have to carry around a flashlight just because someone won't leave a light on.

And in my 16 years I have never noticed a light left on, nor have I wanted or asked for a light to be left on. I have always been able to get out of the car and walk to my job with help. I guess I just don't see why she can't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is ridiculous. She asked for A LIGHT. EVERY FAMILY I HAVE WORKED FOR, IN 12 YEARS!!!! has left the outside light on for security, for they're own house and my safety, without being asked. This is called common sense. Just because she's asking for a light doesn't mean she has issues, is jumpy or anything other than cautious. No one should have to carry around a flashlight just because someone won't leave a light on.

And in my 16 years I have never noticed a light left on, nor have I wanted or asked for a light to be left on. I have always been able to get out of the car and walk to my job with help. I guess I just don't see why she can't.

Congratulations. Your situation allowed you to get into work without a light. Hers doesn't.
No two situations are alike. She's saying she can't see...what's wrong with asking for a porch light?
She's not asking DB to walk her into the house. She's not asking for special treatment.
It's. Just. A. Light.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is ridiculous. She asked for A LIGHT. EVERY FAMILY I HAVE WORKED FOR, IN 12 YEARS!!!! has left the outside light on for security, for they're own house and my safety, without being asked. This is called common sense. Just because she's asking for a light doesn't mean she has issues, is jumpy or anything other than cautious. No one should have to carry around a flashlight just because someone won't leave a light on.

And in my 16 years I have never noticed a light left on, nor have I wanted or asked for a light to be left on. I have always been able to get out of the car and walk to my job with help. I guess I just don't see why she can't.

Congratulations. Your situation allowed you to get into work without a light. Hers doesn't.
No two situations are alike. She's saying she can't see...what's wrong with asking for a porch light?
She's not asking DB to walk her into the house. She's not asking for special treatment.
It's. Just. A. Light.

I've walked to and from my car many times in the dark. As a sexual assault survivor myself I don't let my fears control me.

[Anonymous]

Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

Everyone on the other side of the argument keeps saying Carrying. Extra. Things. Makes. You. A. Target.
How can't you see that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

Everyone on the other side of the argument keeps saying Carrying. Extra. Things. Makes. You. A. Target.
How can't you see that?

Everyone on the other side of the chat says If.You.Are.So.Scared.Maybe.Don't.Carry.Two.Big.Bags.In.The.First.Place.And.Leave.A.Hand.Available.For.A.Flashlight. Seems like common sense to me, it is a safety issue after all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

Everyone on the other side of the argument keeps saying Carrying. Extra. Things. Makes. You. A. Target.
How can't you see that?

Everyone on the other side of the chat says If.You.Are.So.Scared.Maybe.Don't.Carry.Two.Big.Bags.In.The.First.Place.And.Leave.A.Hand.Available.For.A.Flashlight. Seems like common sense to me, it is a safety issue after all.

You're correct. Having a light on in the dark is a safety issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

Everyone on the other side of the argument keeps saying Carrying. Extra. Things. Makes. You. A. Target.
How can't you see that?

Everyone on the other side of the chat says If.You.Are.So.Scared.Maybe.Don't.Carry.Two.Big.Bags.In.The.First.Place.And.Leave.A.Hand.Available.For.A.Flashlight. Seems like common sense to me, it is a safety issue after all.

You're correct. Having a light on in the dark is a safety issue.

Finally! We have all agreed OP should buy a flashlight so she always has the safety of a light in the dark.... WHY DID IT TAKE 100 POSTS to get to this point? Do you just like to argue?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

Everyone on the other side of the argument keeps saying Carrying. Extra. Things. Makes. You. A. Target.
How can't you see that?

Everyone on the other side of the chat says If.You.Are.So.Scared.Maybe.Don't.Carry.Two.Big.Bags.In.The.First.Place.And.Leave.A.Hand.Available.For.A.Flashlight. Seems like common sense to me, it is a safety issue after all.

You're correct. Having a light on in the dark is a safety issue.

Finally! We have all agreed OP should buy a flashlight so she always has the safety of a light in the dark.... WHY DID IT TAKE 100 POSTS to get to this point? Do you just like to argue?

Huh? Who is this "we have all" you speak of? I see many, many posts saying that flashlights are just one more thing to carry and that a porch light should be left on for nannies. Why is this so hard for you to understand?
You haven't won here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

Everyone on the other side of the argument keeps saying Carrying. Extra. Things. Makes. You. A. Target.
How can't you see that?

Everyone on the other side of the chat says If.You.Are.So.Scared.Maybe.Don't.Carry.Two.Big.Bags.In.The.First.Place.And.Leave.A.Hand.Available.For.A.Flashlight. Seems like common sense to me, it is a safety issue after all.

You're correct. Having a light on in the dark is a safety issue.

Finally! We have all agreed OP should buy a flashlight so she always has the safety of a light in the dark.... WHY DID IT TAKE 100 POSTS to get to this point? Do you just like to argue?

Huh? Who is this "we have all" you speak of? I see many, many posts saying that flashlights are just one more thing to carry and that a porch light should be left on for nannies. Why is this so hard for you to understand?
You haven't won here.

Both sides have come together to agree that nanny needs light and a flashlight is known to provide light. We agree nanny is carrying to many things and is making herself a target with 2 bags in the dark. We have agreed nanny needs to slim down to one bag and a flashlight for safety. We have all won.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone copes differently. This is part of what's wrong with humans. Each one expects the others to be just like them. It's acting more like the toddlers we care for , than enlightened adults. It's. Just. A. Light.

And everyone on the other side of the discussion is saying It's.Just.A.Flashlight, how can't you see that.

Everyone on the other side of the argument keeps saying Carrying. Extra. Things. Makes. You. A. Target.
How can't you see that?

Everyone on the other side of the chat says If.You.Are.So.Scared.Maybe.Don't.Carry.Two.Big.Bags.In.The.First.Place.And.Leave.A.Hand.Available.For.A.Flashlight. Seems like common sense to me, it is a safety issue after all.

You're correct. Having a light on in the dark is a safety issue.

Finally! We have all agreed OP should buy a flashlight so she always has the safety of a light in the dark.... WHY DID IT TAKE 100 POSTS to get to this point? Do you just like to argue?

Huh? Who is this "we have all" you speak of? I see many, many posts saying that flashlights are just one more thing to carry and that a porch light should be left on for nannies. Why is this so hard for you to understand?
You haven't won here.

Both sides have come together to agree that nanny needs light and a flashlight is known to provide light. We agree nanny is carrying to many things and is making herself a target with 2 bags in the dark. We have agreed nanny needs to slim down to one bag and a flashlight for safety. We have all won.

"We" agree to nothing.