Carpool

[Anonymous]

Are au pairs allowed to give rides to host kids’ friends? A neighborhood parent has asked for rides to school for their son. Thanks

[Anonymous]

We do not allow this. Way too much liability if there is an accident, in my opinion.

[Anonymous]

It's a slippery slope. We have neighbors who see our AP as built in babysitter for their kids. Car pool here and there, babysitting requests follow, then playdates where they vanish for hours and expect your AP to watch all the kids.

Just say no at the beginning and make it clear to AP about the expectations.

[Anonymous]

technically, an au pair should not be babysitting other kids. if they are driving another child, and that child's parent is not in the car, the au pair would be babysitting. this is not allowed. people need to figure out their own childcare and stop trying to let others do the work for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:technically, an au pair should not be babysitting other kids. if they are driving another child, and that child's parent is not in the car, the au pair would be babysitting. this is not allowed. people need to figure out their own childcare and stop trying to let others do the work for them.

I would not ask our au pair to drive other children. However we do expect our children to be able to have playdates (this is part of the point of not doing aftercare and having an au pair) and although it's technically against the rules we are very clear about this expectation in the matching process. (Fwiw we are sticklers with regard to literally every other rule.) We are on au pair #4 and all have liked this arrangment--at our kids' ages (6 and 10) having a playdate makes less work for her as the kids are occupied, and also because the kids get invited back to their playmates' houses. It helps that we would not inflict a poorly behaved child on her. If having an au pair meant depriving our kids of a social life we'd exist the program, full stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:technically, an au pair should not be babysitting other kids. if they are driving another child, and that child's parent is not in the car, the au pair would be babysitting. this is not allowed. people need to figure out their own childcare and stop trying to let others do the work for them.

I would not ask our au pair to drive other children. However we do expect our children to be able to have playdates (this is part of the point of not doing aftercare and having an au pair) and although it's technically against the rules we are very clear about this expectation in the matching process. (Fwiw we are sticklers with regard to literally every other rule.) We are on au pair #4 and all have liked this arrangment--at our kids' ages (6 and 10) having a playdate makes less work for her as the kids are occupied, and also because the kids get invited back to their playmates' houses. It helps that we would not inflict a poorly behaved child on her. If having an au pair meant depriving our kids of a social life we'd exist the program, full stop.

*we'd exit the program, full stop

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:technically, an au pair should not be babysitting other kids. if they are driving another child, and that child's parent is not in the car, the au pair would be babysitting. this is not allowed. people need to figure out their own childcare and stop trying to let others do the work for them.

I would not ask our au pair to drive other children. However we do expect our children to be able to have playdates (this is part of the point of not doing aftercare and having an au pair) and although it's technically against the rules we are very clear about this expectation in the matching process. (Fwiw we are sticklers with regard to literally every other rule.) We are on au pair #4 and all have liked this arrangment--at our kids' ages (6 and 10) having a playdate makes less work for her as the kids are occupied, and also because the kids get invited back to their playmates' houses. It helps that we would not inflict a poorly behaved child on her. If having an au pair meant depriving our kids of a social life we'd exist the program, full stop.

*we'd exit the program, full stop

Well, you are breaking the rules, full stop AND you are incurring unnecessary liability for your family. Instead, you should try to arrange play-dates with other families with APs or nannies. During non-COVID times, our AP drives our DD to playdates with other families. She never babysits or drives other people's kids.

[Anonymous]

The naysayers must not have older kids or multiple kids. My AP carpools kids all the time, and my friends carpool my kids. We take turns. Playdates, sports, etc.

My AP would not want to have to be the driver of my kids every single time. And it actually wouldn't work because often my three kids have conflicting schedules.

Have had APs for 8 years. Never been an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The naysayers must not have older kids or multiple kids. My AP carpools kids all the time, and my friends carpool my kids. We take turns. Playdates, sports, etc.

My AP would not want to have to be the driver of my kids every single time. And it actually wouldn't work because often my three kids have conflicting schedules.

Have had APs for 8 years. Never been an issue.

You are just fortunate that you haven't had an accident. YOu are breaking program rules. You need to make different arrangements (HM of multiple kids, wide age range).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The naysayers must not have older kids or multiple kids. My AP carpools kids all the time, and my friends carpool my kids. We take turns. Playdates, sports, etc.

My AP would not want to have to be the driver of my kids every single time. And it actually wouldn't work because often my three kids have conflicting schedules.

Have had APs for 8 years. Never been an issue.

You as parents carpooling is very different from smeone like an Au Pair who has restrictions on her visa. Not okay.

[Anonymous]

Driving other kids is a hard no.

Trading play dates is possible. Babysitting is for pay; trading play dates incurs no extra pay but results in more time off. If they want to abide by the rules, that’s fine: play dates will always have two AP present, but they are to supervise, not chitchat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The naysayers must not have older kids or multiple kids. My AP carpools kids all the time, and my friends carpool my kids. We take turns. Playdates, sports, etc.

My AP would not want to have to be the driver of my kids every single time. And it actually wouldn't work because often my three kids have conflicting schedules.

Have had APs for 8 years. Never been an issue.

You are just fortunate that you haven't had an accident. YOu are breaking program rules. You need to make different arrangements (HM of multiple kids, wide age range).

My AP is covered by our insurance. I don't get your point at all.

Please show me the rule that APs can drive other kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The naysayers must not have older kids or multiple kids. My AP carpools kids all the time, and my friends carpool my kids. We take turns. Playdates, sports, etc.

My AP would not want to have to be the driver of my kids every single time. And it actually wouldn't work because often my three kids have conflicting schedules.

Have had APs for 8 years. Never been an issue.

You are just fortunate that you haven't had an accident. YOu are breaking program rules. You need to make different arrangements (HM of multiple kids, wide age range).

My AP is covered by our insurance. I don't get your point at all.

Please show me the rule that APs can drive other kids?

It’s in the rules that the AP can ONLY be responsible for her host kids.

Unless a parent drives in the car with her and the kids, she would be left in sole care of those other kids which is not okay.

Let say one of the kids have any type of medical emergency during the trip, who would be responsible for solving it?

It’s a massive liability that your AP might feel she can’t say no to but is absolutely not within the rules and not okay either on a moral level.

[Anonymous]

Bless your heart.

[Anonymous]

We hosted for 12 years. It’s absolutely insane for someone to suggest you can’t have an AP drive carpool. We carpooled the entire time we hosted, to and from school, to and from sports, etc. AP oversaw playmates as well. As long as it’s all reciprocal, it’s part of the job. We lived in four states while hosting so had several LCCs. All knew about the carpools and all were 100% fine with it.