How do I go back to his place and watch a movie without having sex? Is that possible?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Is this what people are expecting now?? Back on the dating scene and I honestly can't imagine having sex with someone before date 7-10! Man I'm screwed.


No - move at the pace you want. Im more of a 8-12 date range and I've never had a guy ditch me for it. They'll wait if they're into you.


Not even Rihanna is interesting enough to take on 12 dates before action. You puritans must be dating some real top shelf beta male schmucks.


Guys like that are in their 40s and still living with their mom.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op here with an update.
To answer a few questions, I have known him for about 6 months through work, we don't work together (I'm a contractor on an "as needed" basis where he works, we are in separate buildings) to clear up that we are NOT coworkers and NOT strangers. Very familiar with and have talked to him a lot before dating.


Hmmm you have known this guy for 6 months and you're not sure you want to have sex with him yet? Sounds like you need to rethink this. You don't sound really interested.

Anonymous wrote:Op here with an update.
I took a lot of advice so here is what I did and how it ended up. I am grateful to the person who suggested a dress and tights, that made me laugh at first but was also a great point.


Because no man ever managed to get a chick to take off a dress and tights...

Did he even try to have sex with you? If not, that seems kinda weak tbh.


Or, you know, not rapey.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op here with an update.
To answer a few questions, I have known him for about 6 months through work, we don't work together (I'm a contractor on an "as needed" basis where he works, we are in separate buildings) to clear up that we are NOT coworkers and NOT strangers. Very familiar with and have talked to him a lot before dating.
I took a lot of advice so here is what I did and how it ended up. I am grateful to the person who suggested a dress and tights, that made me laugh at first but was also a great point.
I also liked the idea of being up front about it and laughing, even though that person got shot down, that is exactly what I did and it worked perfectly. I did it before the movie and he laughed too and said he was also worried I thought he meant "Netflix and chill" like the young people on Tindr and wouldn't want to come. So we Netflix and halfway chilled and it was awesome.
And the news said there were 6 car accidents in the mall parking lot, and 20 something cars ticketed/towed


You slept with him.


OP here
I laughed so hard when I read this! My best friend listened to the entire story of my night and said the exact same thing. I did not!


I believe you op! And I'm someone who dated a coworker after a year of being friends and who went over to 'talk' about dating for real and had sex that afternoon! And came over to watch movies the next weekend and did it again hahaha. He's my DH now so I think this is a great way to start a relationship!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Never EVER tell a guy you are making him wait to have sex because he is special. All that communicates is that she is willing to go crazy in bed night one with the bad boys but you, nice guy, don't do much for her sexually but if you jump through enough hoops it might happen, one day. This is a man's worst fear.

Most non-rapist men, i.e. most men will both respect and understand that sex may not happen on a second date and will respect a woman's boundaries.


As a man there is nothing more insulting than a woman who insists on make you wait for sex and tells you to your face.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Is this what people are expecting now?? Back on the dating scene and I honestly can't imagine having sex with someone before date 7-10! Man I'm screwed.


Yes, you might want to reexamine your priorities.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
No - move at the pace you want. Im more of a 8-12 date range and I've never had a guy ditch me for it.


Stop lying
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Is this what people are expecting now?? Back on the dating scene and I honestly can't imagine having sex with someone before date 7-10! Man I'm screwed.


So you expect a man to pony up 10 x $100-200 per date - $1000-2000 in overpriced food and wine to get your pants off? So classy. Why don't I just cut to the chase and give you a Christian Dior Diorama the first time I pick you up?


This right here makes me afraid to be in the dating world right now. I'd much rather pay for myself, than have some man think just because he paid for two dates that he has a right to have sex with me. If you are that worried about wasting money, you should get more creative with date ideas.
Anonymous
If you don't wan to have sex, yet, decline his offer.
Anonymous
Glad it was okay! What I learned is that advice from people under huge assumptions is worthless for the most part, and I learned what tramps most of them are! I thought I was loose, but I see it's a full spectrum of looseness. I thibk they are imagining everyone is at their level of speed to spread 'em.
Anon100
Member Offline
Man talking here- What made you so sure that he wanted sex? And how, or why, were you so arrogant to presume that unless you broached the topic beforehand that it would have gone that far? It's insulting to assume that a man would just hop into bed with you. You have to work to get inside my pants. It's never assumed that we will be sleeping together. Dates are NOT the man spending money and time to get laid. It's two adults spending time together to appeal to each other and exploring the possibility of further romance. The minute you view dating as a transactional process whereby you think I'm out for only one thing...you've lost focus on what this is all about. Honestly, if you had approached me about this topic there wouldn't have been a date.
Anonymous
Come over for a movie is high and college boys trying to get action for zero dollars. Did he offer shots of Fireball too? Have some respect for yourself.
Anonymous
My wife and I had sex on the second date. She wanted to on the first but thought she'd look slutty lol
singledadmclean
Member Offline
Beta male nice guy here. I never push for sex and end up wasting a lot of time. After 10 dates I can tell, not only am I not getting any, they have hooked up with some other guy they aren't telling me about. I need to change what I am doing.

I have an alpha friend who insists on sex on the 2nd date or he walks. This policy has not only gotten him lots of dates, and has had several long-term relationships with high quality women.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op here with an update.
To answer a few questions, I have known him for about 6 months through work, we don't work together (I'm a contractor on an "as needed" basis where he works, we are in separate buildings) to clear up that we are NOT coworkers and NOT strangers. Very familiar with and have talked to him a lot before dating.


Hmmm you have known this guy for 6 months and you're not sure you want to have sex with him yet? Sounds like you need to rethink this. You don't sound really interested.

Anonymous wrote:Op here with an update.
I took a lot of advice so here is what I did and how it ended up. I am grateful to the person who suggested a dress and tights, that made me laugh at first but was also a great point.


Because no man ever managed to get a chick to take off a dress and tights...

Did he even try to have sex with you? If not, that seems kinda weak tbh.


Or, you know, not rapey.


Or you know, if he makes a move and she says no and that ends it there is nothing "rapey" about it, moron.
Anonymous
singledadmclean wrote:Beta male nice guy here. I never push for sex and end up wasting a lot of time. After 10 dates I can tell, not only am I not getting any, they have hooked up with some other guy they aren't telling me about. I need to change what I am doing.

I have an alpha friend who insists on sex on the 2nd date or he walks. This policy has not only gotten him lots of dates, and has had several long-term relationships with high quality women.


Please don't "insist" on sex. Your friend is an ass not an alpha. There is a difference.
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