DH, 50, lost out on another job, feeling depressed and hopeless
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
I don't get why you can't do it right now. You are getting older, not younger, so the discrimination is going to get worse. You need to go out there and get a job. |
Anonymous
I am not the op or pp but this coming from someone who has never been there is asking for karma to kick you in the ass. |
Anonymous
| I'm not the PP either, but why can't you go back to work??!!!!! Work anywhere. Really. Work a minimum wage job. Get up each morning and spend the entire eight hour day looking for jobs. Even restaurants will take you with no experience or work history. I had no experience at a restaurant and they hired me in my late 20's. Don't use your age as an excuse. You could also do after school care, work at a daycare, walk dogs, do elder care, etc...stop making excuses. |
Anonymous
| OP: I know you are settled in here, but it is very expensive here. If your kids are in school (at age 50?) and you cannot afford to live here, that still equals you cannot afford to live here. Age discrimination IS real, but you are turning down the opportunites that you DO have, such as your DH could work overseas if he needed to. As far as shelving books, that is an easy job that will go to someone with connections at the school. I do agree that waitressing is out. You are too old. You should be thinking about your retirement, not hanging on here. I feel you --we are in the same position. But our house is paid down and the kids go to public school. Then they can borrow for state school, if needed, so we are staying put. |
Anonymous
NP here: I'm also feeling a bit worried and anxious about my job search, and just wanted to let you know that it helps to see a kind and optimistic post like yours. |
Anonymous
|
For your DH: I would network a lot through Linkedn and also there are a lot of meetups in various fields and topics that he can choose. Yuo will meet lots of people there and also increase your skills.
For you ; I would say, please let go fo ego and see what is more important fro your family. Discrimination is everywhere - wether you are 50 or 20, white or colored. You have to focus on your important goals and let your work speak for you. I can feel your pain as we wnt througha similar financial drought recently. It was amazing the way company would tell you that you have this job etc and then not to hear another word from them. But what I learnt from my DH was still be graciuos and thank them for their time and let them know if anything changes you would like to hear from them. "Keep the doors open". God bless! |
Anonymous
| OP sounds incredibly lazy and full of excuses. |
Anonymous
People lay off the OP, she is going through a hard time here. My dh was laid off 5 years ago from his job and applied at hundreds of jobs, networked and just finally gave up. He couldn't even get a retail job even though he applied at a lot of those. And he had to make enough to pay for childcare. It is not easy out there. Go over to older kids and teenagers and see how the teens can't get summer jobs either. We finally decided that my dh would be a SAHD until the kids are in school. Our youngest goes to K in the Fall, and he is going to give this job search another good try. |
scotcitz
Member Offline
Member Offline
|
Was there ever an update on the situation from OP? I can emphasize with trying to help an older partner with a search.
|
Anonymous
| One good resource for older job hunters is 40Plus, a networking org for professionals over 40. They have a Monday speaker series and networking. |
Anonymous
| change the resume to make his age harder to determine. |
Anonymous
|
Anonymous
Because OP's question is only tangentially related to family income. She's looking for ways to help husband land a new job because he's getting depressed and feeling hopeless about his prospects after several promising attempts failed to result in getting hired. If OP could add something to the family income, of course that would be nice but it wouldn't address the real issue, which is her husband's sense of value in the workplace, ambition, age, professional identity, career expectations. In other words, this post isn't about money. |
Anonymous
|
I know this is an old post, but it helped reading through it this morning. My DH is 30, but also struggling to find work. He's in a niche field, his contract ended and he's in that difficult spot of having too much experience/education for entry level and not enough for the next step up (5 years of experience when all the positions want 7 years, but he's over-qualified and competing against cheaper just-graduated applicants for the next level down). He's networked like crazy and like OP's husband has made it through several rounds for several positions, but they've gone with other, slightly less qualified people each time.
It's been hard. He's depressed. I work FT, but don't make enough to keep us afloat on my own. He's even been looking at retail and food service and has managed to bring in just enough to keep our lights on and the rent paid. We're out of savings, we've cut back everywhere we can, and we're stressed. He feels like a loser and I'm not sure how to help him. He's cut his salary requirements and started looking at jobs outside his niche too. Nothing has popped. We're looking at jobs everywhere, not just DC. But the industry he's in is limited, so even that isn't helping much. And we can't afford to move if there is no relocation assistance (which isn't usually offered at his level). It's tough. It sucks. I hate seeing him so down. |
Anonymous
| My Dh is also looking for a job and is 30. He was a government contractor and laid off at the end of last year. Networking has not worked for my husband. He networks like crazy, going to several meetup and professional events every week. I hope the job market improves this year. |