I'm communicating here just fine you dipshit. I am cursing like a sailor because you are so irritating and I am using a relaxed conversational style since I am just on the internet, primarily dealing with assholes and trolls.

If it was as easy as your situation sounded then I would seriously consider it but I don't have family or close friends who I could have meet my boys at the airport and take them to the camp and everything....I am not comfortable with the way it would work in my case but giving your children as much international experience as possible is really great opportunity. I would say that the time I spent in Europe and Asia as a teen really broadened my horizons...and it also got me a lot of tail.

I completed high school and college and have a masters degree in International Business...you fucking trolls are irritating. Why do you want to know so much about me Mr or Mrs Anonymous 13:05?

11:36 I feel that way to an extent...but I think once they are like my kids age 13-14 it is no longer worth fighting. They are pretty much going to know what is right and wrong by then...but for 9 year olds into their early teens I think monitoring the media they are taking in is really important to making sure their heads are screwed on right. The argument I don't get parents making is with their kids hairstyle choices and (up to a point) their wardrobe choices. Now I am not talking about revealing clothing or clothing with obscene or satanic messages but if my kid wants to shave a stupid mohawk into his hair and dye it purple who cares. Sure he will look like a retarded dipshit for awhile but that's his choice...not worth the fight IMO....

I hear what you are saying 12:34 that is a good argument about the not knowing when to stop without being hit. I don't think it is valid at all but it is an interesting argument. But I see a major flaw in your logic about "wouldn't they have only had to beat you say once or twice ever" argument. Aren't there more than one or 2 things that a kid can do that requires discipline of any level. If I smacked my little sister...they'd show me what time it was. I didn't hit my sister or any girl ever again. I told my grandma to shut up once....ONCE. That lesson didn't need re-teaching. There were 100 reasons why I deserved the 100 ass whoopings I got as a kid. And most of them were first offenses...except lying. That one was hard to learn...you always think that you might just be able to get one over on them....stupid kids. That is a good lesson to teach your kids...."You are a child and I am an adult. You are not slick. I am way smarter than you are right now and you will not be able to fool me with any degree of success so please do yourself a favor and don't make things worse by being dishonest...because I will go upside your head." You guys can feel free to use that. That's a freebie! I think I'm going to write a parenting book.

In the other thread it got so bad I started feeling like I wasn't acting like myself and I was just saying shit to get a response after awhile...but it's hard to get a regular conversation out of the people here generally but the ones who do talk about the question or topic are usually smart and insightful. But maybe that's just my experience.

I don't know if anyone else said this or not, I overheard 2 women having lunch last summer and the one woman said something like "It can be so difficult when you have a special needs child" and the other woman said "If you don't mind me asking, how retarded is he?"

Seriously....that was a joke though. I know so many great and smart people who feel the way we do 19:10...but most of them don't feel like coming onto a website like this to get attacked by people who think they know everything because they follow every word that some asshat on TV who puts a Dr. in front of his name says to do... And I'm having a hard enough time fighting in this one I don't think I have it in me to do this somewhere else too!

19:10 is a sensible woman. I thought they stopped making those.

Thank you for sharing 19:10. I have really been taking some maulings on here from these people!! It's good to see a couple other people who aren't mad that they got punished when they were bad and can see how effective a small dose of controlled violence can be to shaping a youngster into something better than they are!

Don't take my positive mental attitude for weakness, kiddo!

But I will straight go 5 across the eyes if they need it too...

SERIOUSLY! I mean on the other hand if a kid does something good. Let em know about it. Pat em on the back and make sure they are rewarded somehow. I'm not one of those parents that just punishes their kids...I reward the hell out of those 2 monsters. When they deserve it...which is actually most of the time.

Anonymous wrote:

dedicateddad wrote:They are 14 now and I don't think I've had an occasion to raise a hand to them in well over a year. They have more freedoms than many of their contemporaries because they have earned my trust with their positive behavior. I showed them structure, I showed them the value of never doing less than your best, and I taught them that sometimes if you do the wrong thing there are consequences for their actions.

Two thoughts: First, there's a very good chance you've just taught them to hide their transgressions more effectively. Second, if you're teaching them there are *physical* consequences for their actions, you're not teaching them much. Much better to let them experience the logical consequences of their actions. Down the road, why not cheat on your wife (or embezzle company money)? It's not like someone's going to beat you up for it.

There are not physical consequences for their actions generally because they are good kids who know right from wrong. Those lessons will carry them through life. But knowing in the back of your head and hearing that little voice that says "Wait a minute...this is wrong. If I get caught doing this somebody is going to fuck me up..." is a good thing. I'm still glad I hear that voice in my head now as an adult and a father. Seriously...nobody is going upside my head anymore and haven't in a looong time but the voice is still there and stops me in my tracks every time.

Who the fuck are you to tell me I didn't learn my lessons in service? I obeyed that person because I knew that if I didn't that the punishment would be much worse than the desired behavior. Whether that was physical punishment like being smacked in the head or physical punishment like running for 1000000000 hours straight. I didn't want the punishment and it became a badge of honor for me (figuratively) to know that my performance and behavior was satisfying my officers and I was doing a good job for the Corps. Suck my dick.