Wife Spending Too Much

[Anonymous]

My wife is spending money like crazy lately. She normally doesn’t spend much but she has spent around 8k in the last month. We are expecting our first child at the end of the month and most of that was towards nursing furniture and items we didn’t get from our baby registry, but that was still like 5k. She spent $1500 at Costco, $1000 on Amazon, $500 on beauty stuff, and a couple of other places. She says it all stuff to stock up on so we don’t have to shop for 3 months besides groceries when the baby gets here. She bought a lot of stuff that she was worried will go out of stock again once flu/cold season hit that was unavailable because of the pandemic.

She thinks I’m overreacting when I brought it up. Am I overreacting?

[Anonymous]

Really depends on your HHI.

I spend around 10k every month. It is mostly on the kids. We have 3. We also like to travel.

Babies can cost as much or as little as you want. I bought a $1200 stroller when I had my first kid.

[Anonymous]

The average cost of a baby in the first year is $7000 for all the stuff you need (that is from 2011 when I had my first). She should slow down.

Honestly, for my first kid I almost did not buy anything. I bought a car seat, a bassinet, 5 outfits, diapers, 3 glass bottles (I never bought more), a breast pump, 3 swaddling blankets AND THAT IS IT. A baby only needs a boob, some clothes, and diapers. Oh, and a gliding chair that was relaly nice ($600) because I knew I would need it.

I bought a crib later as well as other stuff as I needed it. I kept a spreadsheet and spent $7,000 total the first year.

[Anonymous]

She's probably right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Really depends on your HHI.

I spend around 10k every month. It is mostly on the kids. We have 3. We also like to travel.

Babies can cost as much or as little as you want. I bought a $1200 stroller when I had my first kid.

10k month? What do you guy for 3 kids that costs that much?

[Anonymous]

She’s nesting. Whether you are overreacting or not really depends on whether or not you have the money. If she is going into credit card debt, then you are not overreacting. If, on the other hand, she is an anesthesiologist and makes $400k/yr, or she has been saving money for years in order to make a big splurge, then let her spend some of it on the baby without a big guilt trip from you.

[Anonymous]

Nesting is not an excuse for copious spending.

Op, the two of you need to work out a budget NOW. Her shopping habits sound more like she’s doing it b/c it’s easy and she’s bored.

[Anonymous]

I think she’s over spending. But if you are over-reacting depends on if your financial situation.

[Anonymous]

It sounds fine and totally normal to me. She's pregnant, don't stress her out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She’s nesting. Whether you are overreacting or not really depends on whether or not you have the money. If she is going into credit card debt, then you are not overreacting. If, on the other hand, she is an anesthesiologist and makes $400k/yr, or she has been saving money for years in order to make a big splurge, then let her spend some of it on the baby without a big guilt trip from you.

OP here. She doesn’t make that much but we do have a good HHI with plenty of savings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nesting is not an excuse for copious spending.

Op, the two of you need to work out a budget NOW. Her shopping habits sound more like she’s doing it b/c it’s easy and she’s bored.

OP here. We don’t have a budget because she normally never spends this kind of money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wife is spending money like crazy lately. She normally doesn’t spend much but she has spent around 8k in the last month. We are expecting our first child at the end of the month and most of that was towards nursing furniture and items we didn’t get from our baby registry, but that was still like 5k. She spent $1500 at Costco, $1000 on Amazon, $500 on beauty stuff, and a couple of other places. She says it all stuff to stock up on so we don’t have to shop for 3 months besides groceries when the baby gets here. She bought a lot of stuff that she was worried will go out of stock again once flu/cold season hit that was unavailable because of the pandemic.

She thinks I’m overreacting when I brought it up. Am I overreacting?

She's already the default parent. You should thank her for her foresight and planning ahead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She’s nesting. Whether you are overreacting or not really depends on whether or not you have the money. If she is going into credit card debt, then you are not overreacting. If, on the other hand, she is an anesthesiologist and makes $400k/yr, or she has been saving money for years in order to make a big splurge, then let her spend some of it on the baby without a big guilt trip from you.

OP here. She doesn’t make that much but we do have a good HHI with plenty of savings.

Your combined HHI is all that matter in these kinds of things. Do you know how much money you would have to pay a surrogate to carry your baby?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Really depends on your HHI.

I spend around 10k every month. It is mostly on the kids. We have 3. We also like to travel.

Babies can cost as much or as little as you want. I bought a $1200 stroller when I had my first kid.

So true.

I wore my baby in a $20 wrap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Really depends on your HHI.

I spend around 10k every month. It is mostly on the kids. We have 3. We also like to travel.

Babies can cost as much or as little as you want. I bought a $1200 stroller when I had my first kid.

So true.

I wore my baby in a $20 wrap.

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