Would You Date Someone Who Used To Be Overweight?

[Anonymous]

I had gastric bypass. My body looks great. I have no problem with attracting men. They dont want to know. They dont care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had gastric bypass. My body looks great. I have no problem with attracting men. They dont want to know. They dont care.

I think they would want to know. That is a major surgery that can have life long medical complications, sometimes down the road several years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never marry a woman I thought would gain a substantial amount. Complete deal breaker.

Completely agree. I broke up with my type A college boyfriend guy like you because I wanted to be loved for who I am, not my size. He is doing well, but getting a divorce 20+ years later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had gastric bypass. My body looks great. I have no problem with attracting men. They dont want to know. They dont care.

I think they would want to know. That is a major surgery that can have life long medical complications, sometimes down the road several years.

NP-so what? Lifelong good health is not a guarantee for anyone.

[Anonymous]

Want those big fat legs around my body. My wife is anorexic.

[Anonymous]

40 years ago, in my 20s, I lost 70 lbs and got to a weight that was just above normal. Since then my weight has fluctuated by 10 to 20 lbs but always took it back and now weigh 80 lbs less than I did at the peak. However, when you look at the percentage of those who have weight issues and lost a sizable amount, that is very rare.

With that in mind if I were to date someone who has lost that kind of weight I would have to consider whether the added weight would make a difference to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had gastric bypass. My body looks great. I have no problem with attracting men. They dont want to know. They dont care.

Nor will they care so long as it's a casual relationship that includes sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd date someone who was currently overweight.

This. My husband lost a lot of weight and when we met, he was at his lowest weight in years. I knew going in that he would likely struggle with weight, and he does. I love him! We have a great sex life too. Your story is part of who you are, and someone who loves you will love you with that story.

Its kind of that simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Want those big fat legs around my body. My wife is anorexic.

Come on man! THat is so unhelpful.

[Anonymous]

I lost 140 pounds on WW and never tell the men I date. I learned early on even the good guys will leave after they find out. I have very minimal stretch marks on my stomach but no other evidence of my former large self. Thankfully no loose skin and my stretch marks are basically 4 small lines. No need to share this information.

[Anonymous]

My brother met my SIL when he was at his lowest weight. He only stayed there for maybe a year? Now he’s almost 400 pounds and has bigger boobs than me.

[Anonymous]

Statistically most will gain it back, so no.

"By some estimates, 80% of people who successfully lose at least 10% of their body weight will gradually regain it to end up as large or even larger than they were before they went on a diet." https://www.webmd.com/diet/news/20161014/how-your-appetite-can-sabotage-weight-loss#1

It's not purely aesthetic for me. I am very active/athletic and eat healthily, and those things are important to me. Given that they are likely to gain it back, I would worry that they would get into habits that were incompatible with my lifestyle and I know it would be frustrating to me. I would have a very hard time being supportive of a spouse who brought junk food into the house, spent free time doing sedentary activities, and serving up huge portions. They would be unhappy (because I am judge-y about lifestyle habits), and I would be unhappy (because it would feel unsupportive of my health goals to be around habits that were not conducive to my diet and exercise efforts).