Assault allegation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would look into volunteer opportunities to help abused women and children. Regardless of his guilt or innocence, it will give him an experience that may help him empathize with his accuser and other women who have suffered physical or sexual assault.
If he is not guilty, then there is some issue going on in her life that is driving her make false accusations.

No earthly way. Women and children that were already subject to assault do not deserve to be subject to the possibility of further assault and exploitation by a possible rapist. They are even more vulnerable than women and children in the general population.

+1 Putting someone who may be a sexual offender in contact with low-income survivors is some fox in the henhouse nonsense. But even if OP's son isn't an offender, assault survivors deserve better than to be the subject of some "object lesson" for an UMC teen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of women will have regrets after and then say it wasn’t consensual. The amount of drinking on college campuses in troubling and these two drunk teens/20-somethings should not be having sex. As terrified I am for my daughters, I’m just as terrified my sons could be falsely accused. It happens.

This is a trope as old as time and literally has no data or evidence to support it and I'd also wager it has changed significantly as our culture has shifted to not socializing women to think sex is a "stain" on her reputation.

There is a real problem of binge drinking and consent but I just don't buy this boogey man of "they make it up when they regret it" anymore. It doesn't ring true as an actual problem of any scale.

And this is with KNOWING someone who was falsely accused- with the ability to prove it but was still terrified- the police and everyone handling the case were honestly surprised as it quickly played out and that this was actually made up...its not this common thing that everyone talks about. You know what is common though? Actual assault.

Not in my experience. My next door neighbor had a niece from bumfu.ck NC that came to live in DC every summer. She spent the entire summer on her back and lied about all of it.

They are often very troubled women. Duke lacrosse false accuser.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A lot of women will have regrets after and then say it wasn’t consensual. The amount of drinking on college campuses in troubling and these two drunk teens/20-somethings should not be having sex. As terrified I am for my daughters, I’m just as terrified my sons could be falsely accused. It happens.

This is a trope as old as time and literally has no data or evidence to support it and I'd also wager it has changed significantly as our culture has shifted to not socializing women to think sex is a "stain" on her reputation.

There is a real problem of binge drinking and consent but I just don't buy this boogey man of "they make it up when they regret it" anymore. It doesn't ring true as an actual problem of any scale.

And this is with KNOWING someone who was falsely accused- with the ability to prove it but was still terrified- the police and everyone handling the case were honestly surprised as it quickly played out and that this was actually made up...its not this common thing that everyone talks about. You know what is common though? Actual assault.

Not in my experience. My next door neighbor had a niece from bumfu.ck NC that came to live in DC every summer. She spent the entire summer on her back and lied about all of it.

They are often very troubled women. Duke lacrosse false accuser.

LOL, there it is. You say "troubled" instead of "liar"

Make no mistake, there absolutely exists women who lie about consent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

...then what do we do to help boys/men whose lives are devastated by false accusations. I know the statistics and I agree it's important to believe woman, but that does not mean that we just abandon boys/men who are equally victims. Not only is it not right, it undermines the credibility of all women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

...then what do we do to help boys/men whose lives are devastated by false accusations. I know the statistics and I agree it's important to believe woman, but that does not mean that we just abandon boys/men who are equally victims. Not only is it not right, it undermines the credibility of all women.

There was an infamous case at my school where a girl accused a boy of rape after he broke up with her. The boy was immediately suspended, and it took more than 6 months for the truth to come out. In the meantime, his life was upturned, his reputation was smeared, and his education interrupted. There were no penalties for the girl after it was established that she'd lied.

Not saying this happens often, but it can happen. The inability to establish proof of consent works both ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:his is ridiculous. Reporting sexual assault is absolute torture. As someone who receive consequences on campus for underage drinking as a sophomore, I can guarantee you that it wasn’t 1% as difficult as reporting rape. And I can guarantee you that there’s not a single young woman in college or in America today who thinks that reporting rape is easier than the slap on the wrist a person would get for underage drinking. It’s absolutely preposterous.

Well I’d like to introduce you to my freshman roommate...

I'm sorry, are you in college today?

What has changed is it is widely reported and even dramatized as ENTERTAINMENT how hard it is to report sexual assault. Anyone who then proceeds to make a false claim is seriously mentally ill and likely to not have it go anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:his is ridiculous. Reporting sexual assault is absolute torture. As someone who receive consequences on campus for underage drinking as a sophomore, I can guarantee you that it wasn’t 1% as difficult as reporting rape. And I can guarantee you that there’s not a single young woman in college or in America today who thinks that reporting rape is easier than the slap on the wrist a person would get for underage drinking. It’s absolutely preposterous.

Well I’d like to introduce you to my freshman roommate...

I'm sorry, are you in college today?

What has changed is it is widely reported and even dramatized as ENTERTAINMENT how hard it is to report sexual assault. Anyone who then proceeds to make a false claim is seriously mentally ill and likely to not have it go anywhere.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:his is ridiculous. Reporting sexual assault is absolute torture. As someone who receive consequences on campus for underage drinking as a sophomore, I can guarantee you that it wasn’t 1% as difficult as reporting rape. And I can guarantee you that there’s not a single young woman in college or in America today who thinks that reporting rape is easier than the slap on the wrist a person would get for underage drinking. It’s absolutely preposterous.

Well I’d like to introduce you to my freshman roommate...

I'm sorry, are you in college today?

What has changed is it is widely reported and even dramatized as ENTERTAINMENT how hard it is to report sexual assault. Anyone who then proceeds to make a false claim is seriously mentally ill and likely to not have it go anywhere.

+100

No. You're wrong. It won't "go anywhere" legally, but the boy has a reputation FOREVER as a rapist. In the current climate all anyone has to do is say, "A girl said he..." and that's it. His life is messed up forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:his is ridiculous. Reporting sexual assault is absolute torture. As someone who receive consequences on campus for underage drinking as a sophomore, I can guarantee you that it wasn’t 1% as difficult as reporting rape. And I can guarantee you that there’s not a single young woman in college or in America today who thinks that reporting rape is easier than the slap on the wrist a person would get for underage drinking. It’s absolutely preposterous.

Well I’d like to introduce you to my freshman roommate...

I'm sorry, are you in college today?

What has changed is it is widely reported and even dramatized as ENTERTAINMENT how hard it is to report sexual assault. Anyone who then proceeds to make a false claim is seriously mentally ill and likely to not have it go anywhere.

+100

No. You're wrong. It won't "go anywhere" legally, but the boy has a reputation FOREVER as a rapist. In the current climate all anyone has to do is say, "A girl said he..." and that's it. His life is messed up forever.

Literally zero evidence or statistics to show that this happens with any sort of regularity or significance. Yes, it is horrible when it does. But it doesn't happen any more frequently than other crimes. Further, the process usually works as it should (vindicating accused). What also happens is that, when a woman reports a legit assault, it is often not taken seriously. See the backlog of rape kits in this country as evidence of how seriously rape is taken.

Anyone still complaining about some sort of over-reporting needs to read this. And actually READ it. Not just the headline. https://www.theatlantic.com/press-releases/archive/2019/07/an-epidemic-of-disbelief-august-issue/594145/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

...then what do we do to help boys/men whose lives are devastated by false accusations. I know the statistics and I agree it's important to believe woman, but that does not mean that we just abandon boys/men who are equally victims. Not only is it not right, it undermines the credibility of all women.

It does not ruin lives. That's absurd. Transferring to a new school is not a life ruined. Overdramatic boy daddies, get a life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

...then what do we do to help boys/men whose lives are devastated by false accusations. I know the statistics and I agree it's important to believe woman, but that does not mean that we just abandon boys/men who are equally victims. Not only is it not right, it undermines the credibility of all women.

It does not ruin lives. That's absurd. Transferring to a new school is not a life ruined. Overdramatic boy daddies, get a life.

More like moms of sluts better be ready to pay through the nose when their skank daughters get caught lying...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

...then what do we do to help boys/men whose lives are devastated by false accusations. I know the statistics and I agree it's important to believe woman, but that does not mean that we just abandon boys/men who are equally victims. Not only is it not right, it undermines the credibility of all women.

It does not ruin lives. That's absurd. Transferring to a new school is not a life ruined. Overdramatic boy daddies, get a life.

Do you actually have a child? What if everyone in their middle school/high school thought they were a rapist? Do you live in the DMV? Do you know how social media works? These kids are all connected. Imagine your child gets death threats yelled at them when walking down the street wherever they go in the DMV. Imagine they go to college and somehow someone figures out that it’s “that kid” and now everyone at college thinks your kid is a rapist. Yes. It does ruin lives. Don’t be an asshole.

Pp above says statistics don’t support false accusations. I’m curious. I personally know at least 4 kids this has happened to to one degree or another (one was a girl). I feel like statistics may not have caught up to current reality. Beware.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

...then what do we do to help boys/men whose lives are devastated by false accusations. I know the statistics and I agree it's important to believe woman, but that does not mean that we just abandon boys/men who are equally victims. Not only is it not right, it undermines the credibility of all women.

It does not ruin lives. That's absurd. Transferring to a new school is not a life ruined. Overdramatic boy daddies, get a life.

Do you actually have a child? What if everyone in their middle school/high school thought they were a rapist? Do you live in the DMV? Do you know how social media works? These kids are all connected. Imagine your child gets death threats yelled at them when walking down the street wherever they go in the DMV. Imagine they go to college and somehow someone figures out that it’s “that kid” and now everyone at college thinks your kid is a rapist. Yes. It does ruin lives. Don’t be an asshole.

Pp above says statistics don’t support false accusations. I’m curious. I personally know at least 4 kids this has happened to to one degree or another (one was a girl). I feel like statistics may not have caught up to current reality. Beware.

Well, I've been assaulted twice (neither reported). I was drugged once. I've had other close encounters with aggressive boys/men (in addition to the catcalls and outright harassment). In short, your anecdotes are not data. They are not statistics. Just as mine are not. But, the existing stats do show that there are more of me than there are of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A three year old claim? Is that it? No witness, no corroborating texts like him apologizing or her asking him why he did it? No rape kit or police report? Just some girl coming out of the blue saying Timmy touched me without my permission?

I wouldn't do shit.

If she went to the police or filed a civil suit, I'd hire an attorney with experience pursuing libel and slander and rabidly go after her.

But what if he DID do it? You’d still go after the girl? This is why victims rarely report. You are part of the problem.

...then what do we do to help boys/men whose lives are devastated by false accusations. I know the statistics and I agree it's important to believe woman, but that does not mean that we just abandon boys/men who are equally victims. Not only is it not right, it undermines the credibility of all women.

It does not ruin lives. That's absurd. Transferring to a new school is not a life ruined. Overdramatic boy daddies, get a life.

Do you actually have a child? What if everyone in their middle school/high school thought they were a rapist? Do you live in the DMV? Do you know how social media works? These kids are all connected. Imagine your child gets death threats yelled at them when walking down the street wherever they go in the DMV. Imagine they go to college and somehow someone figures out that it’s “that kid” and now everyone at college thinks your kid is a rapist. Yes. It does ruin lives. Don’t be an asshole.

Pp above says statistics don’t support false accusations. I’m curious. I personally know at least 4 kids this has happened to to one degree or another (one was a girl). I feel like statistics may not have caught up to current reality. Beware.

Well, I've been assaulted twice (neither reported). I was drugged once. I've had other close encounters with aggressive boys/men (in addition to the catcalls and outright harassment). In short, your anecdotes are not data. They are not statistics. Just as mine are not. But, the existing stats do show that there are more of me than there are of you.

Oh, and to answer your question (though I am not the PP you responded to), I do have a child. And I'm far more worried about her being assaulted than about her making some sort of false allegation. Or about this non-existent tidal wave of women making false allegations. Because, we know that isn't happening.