Parents of short boys

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Mom of a very short boy here. Would tennis be a good sport for a short boy?

I’d say yes but he’d need to do extra work to achieve superior skills to compete with taller kids whose long limbs are advantageous in serves and baseline strokes which is 75% of the game nowadays.

np Since when does every activity mean it is going to lead to scholarship in college or the Olympics? Why can't her son play tennis for fun and exercise?

chillex! she asked if it’s a good sport for a short boy. Nobody said anything about scholarship or the olympics.

What does "superior skills" mean to you?

What does “good sport” mean to you?

I think I get what PP is asking. It's not about a scholarship or the Olympics. It's about making the school team in middle school and high school if they want. It's about being able to participate/make the team when things get more competitive. Given their size, this is easier to do with some sports than others.

That said, we exposed our (short) kids to a ton of different sports and then let them choose what they wanted to do. 10 yo DS loves soccer, and that's going well, and as he's getting older he's learning to develop skills that suit his body/role on the team. Will he need "superior skills" to make the middle school team? Probably. My sense is that coaches tend to prefer bigger players, all things being equal. Even if it's not intentional/conscious, that's how it tends to work. So DS will likely have to be a bit more skilled (and have a stronger work ethic) to distinguish himself. It is what it is.

That said, if your short son loves basketball, so be it. Will he make the NBA? Likely not. But if he wants to continue to play, it makes sense to do what you can to help him build "superior skills" to overcome the height disadvantage and compete with bigger boys. (There are a ton of great videos on YouTube with skill building drills etc. for short basketball players, by the way. I know we're talking about our sons, but DD is under 5'0", obsessed with basketball, and truly busts her butt with all sorts of extra training and practice in order to compete with the girls at her middle school who are 5'6" - 5'9". Is it the ideal sport for her? Nope. But she's choosing it, learning to succeed with hard work while recognizing the obstacles, and having a great time with her friends.

My sense is that's what most kids want more than anything else - to play sports or do activities with their friends. If a parent wants to help steer their kid to something they're more likely to succeed at, I get it. My sense is that's what PP was talking about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mom of a short athletic boy now on growth hormone therapy. My son was a soccer player and grew to hate it, because his size and late onset of puberty made it difficult to compete at the level appropriate for his skills. He worked his butt off, but felt like he was constantly getting less playing time when the club picked up kids from outside. To give you perspective, when he started high school, he wasn't on an academy team, but was on a higher level team in the state. He weighed 80 pounds. He has since grown, but unfortunately, he lost his love for the game.

Based on that experience, I would say that if you are going to steer your shorter boy toward a sport, I would pick an individual sport like gymnastics, wrestling martial arts, tennis, or golf. At least that way they can develop their skills outside of the framework of a club/team lens that regularly passes over smaller players and doesn't give them a chance.

By the way, none of this is to say that smaller soccer or other sports players can't be stellar, because obviously they can. But in US soccer culture, it takes a rare talent or incredible determination and commitment for a small player with late onset of puberty to keep playing in a developmentally appropriate environment.

I'm the PP with the 10 yo soccer-loving DS. This is helpful to keep in mind as he gets older. Though I'm sorry for your DS's sucky experience, I appreciate your sharing it with us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mom of a short athletic boy now on growth hormone therapy. My son was a soccer player and grew to hate it, because his size and late onset of puberty made it difficult to compete at the level appropriate for his skills. He worked his butt off, but felt like he was constantly getting less playing time when the club picked up kids from outside. To give you perspective, when he started high school, he wasn't on an academy team, but was on a higher level team in the state. He weighed 80 pounds. He has since grown, but unfortunately, he lost his love for the game.

Based on that experience, I would say that if you are going to steer your shorter boy toward a sport, I would pick an individual sport like gymnastics, wrestling martial arts, tennis, or golf. At least that way they can develop their skills outside of the framework of a club/team lens that regularly passes over smaller players and doesn't give them a chance.

By the way, none of this is to say that smaller soccer or other sports players can't be stellar, because obviously they can. But in US soccer culture, it takes a rare talent or incredible determination and commitment for a small player with late onset of puberty to keep playing in a developmentally appropriate environment.

OP here. I appreciate you sharing. I will definitely keep it in mind. So far my son loves team sports much more than individual as he likes working together with others and not have all eyes on him during meets/competition. But we’ll see if that changes.

[Anonymous]

Just teach him not to be a DB. Short guys with a napoleon complex inmate the worst.

[Anonymous]

I’m a 5’6” guy. Which regard to being teased, there is a big difference between getting jokes about your height from tour friends and insults from non-friends. Jokes from friend me who are guys are inevitable and you just need to be a good sport about it, roll with it, joke back, etc. If he likes sports then some weight training can help build confidence. You can be short and strong. When I was a teen none of
my friends could beat me in arm wrestling. I was also really good at any game that involved punching the loser in the arm. I played other sports recreationally, but I was generally no great by the time high school came around because of my height. I just tried to have fun and didn’t get upset that I was one of the last two people to be picked for a team.

Being short was not a problem in terms of dating until after college, but even then it was not a significant issue. My wife is 5’ 9”.

The thing I would focus on at his age is building up his confidence generally. When you have success in one thing, you don’t doubt you can be successful in other things. Short guys without much confidence can become angry about their height because they think their height is the issue.

[Anonymous]

My son is short 5”5 at 16. His go to response is “yep, those extra inches went to something else “ —usually takes the other guy a minute but once they get it, it makes them laugh and they move on to something else. Probably not appropriate for a 10 yr old ☺️

[Anonymous]

Go to a pediatric endocrinologist. If your son is less than 7th percent, he probably qualifies for growth hormone.