Parents who don't intervene -- why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To all the moms of babies/ young toddlers on the playground- this is something you can't really realize until your kids are older (I certainly didn't realize it), but older kids (say, age 4 and up) really NEED the playground. It's built for kids to climb and run and yell and play independently. That's what school aged kids NEED, especially after a day of Kindergarten or first grade that is too much sit down time for little kids. A 21 month old can get stimulation and age appropriate fun truly by just being at the park and running in the grass, seeing things and people, picking up leaves. Also- they can go to these playgrounds when older kids are in school.

It's kind of like the moms who take their 4 months old to a mommy and me music class. The kid does not need a mommy and me music class- the parent just wants to get out there and "do stuff" with their baby, which I get, because I was that mom at first too. An under 2 year old baby/young toddler doesn't need to be on the playground if it's busy.

Okay one more thing, multiple people on this thread have posted to go at non-peak times or when kids are in school. Exactly how is a working mom supposed to pull that off- the assumptions on here are just crazy privileged.

The nanny can take them, or if they are in daycare they are getting plenty of playground time there. The point is they aren't seated in school from 8-230 every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To all the moms of babies/ young toddlers on the playground- this is something you can't really realize until your kids are older (I certainly didn't realize it), but older kids (say, age 4 and up) really NEED the playground. It's built for kids to climb and run and yell and play independently. That's what school aged kids NEED, especially after a day of Kindergarten or first grade that is too much sit down time for little kids. A 21 month old can get stimulation and age appropriate fun truly by just being at the park and running in the grass, seeing things and people, picking up leaves. Also- they can go to these playgrounds when older kids are in school.

It's kind of like the moms who take their 4 months old to a mommy and me music class. The kid does not need a mommy and me music class- the parent just wants to get out there and "do stuff" with their baby, which I get, because I was that mom at first too. An under 2 year old baby/young toddler doesn't need to be on the playground if it's busy.

Okay one more thing, multiple people on this thread have posted to go at non-peak times or when kids are in school. Exactly how is a working mom supposed to pull that off- the assumptions on here are just crazy privileged.

The nanny can take them, or if they are in daycare they are getting plenty of playground time there. The point is they aren't seated in school from 8-230 every day.

NP but I take my 2.5 year old in the afternoon because he needs to run around and tore himself out after his nap, or he will be up until 10pm. I’m not stupid or self absorbed enough to be letting him play directly under the swing set as a PP said, and I do intervene if he is getting in the way of older kids who are getting frustrated. I do find it annoying when the older kids whine and pick on him though. Today a couple of boys kept coming over and saying “WHY are there always babies here?? It’s sooo annoying. Go away, baby!” He was not in any way interfering with stuff, just sitting there digging in the sandbox. I didn’t say anything because it’s not a big deal, but it would be kind of nice if a mom or baby stepped in here to remind her kid to be kind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To all the moms of babies/ young toddlers on the playground- this is something you can't really realize until your kids are older (I certainly didn't realize it), but older kids (say, age 4 and up) really NEED the playground. It's built for kids to climb and run and yell and play independently. That's what school aged kids NEED, especially after a day of Kindergarten or first grade that is too much sit down time for little kids. A 21 month old can get stimulation and age appropriate fun truly by just being at the park and running in the grass, seeing things and people, picking up leaves. Also- they can go to these playgrounds when older kids are in school.

It's kind of like the moms who take their 4 months old to a mommy and me music class. The kid does not need a mommy and me music class- the parent just wants to get out there and "do stuff" with their baby, which I get, because I was that mom at first too. An under 2 year old baby/young toddler doesn't need to be on the playground if it's busy.

Okay one more thing, multiple people on this thread have posted to go at non-peak times or when kids are in school. Exactly how is a working mom supposed to pull that off- the assumptions on here are just crazy privileged.

We managed when I was working. You just have to find a less busy playground. They exist. Not all are near home. Or go when other families are at dinner, crack of dawn on the weekend, or on rare afternoon you leave early. It’s not ideal, but it’s when these places are more chill. You could also find a soft play room geared towards smaller kids.

[Anonymous]

^Sorry, I meant if a mom or NANNY would say something, not a baby. Oops.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To all the moms of babies/ young toddlers on the playground- this is something you can't really realize until your kids are older (I certainly didn't realize it), but older kids (say, age 4 and up) really NEED the playground. It's built for kids to climb and run and yell and play independently. That's what school aged kids NEED, especially after a day of Kindergarten or first grade that is too much sit down time for little kids. A 21 month old can get stimulation and age appropriate fun truly by just being at the park and running in the grass, seeing things and people, picking up leaves. Also- they can go to these playgrounds when older kids are in school.

It's kind of like the moms who take their 4 months old to a mommy and me music class. The kid does not need a mommy and me music class- the parent just wants to get out there and "do stuff" with their baby, which I get, because I was that mom at first too. An under 2 year old baby/young toddler doesn't need to be on the playground if it's busy.

Okay one more thing, multiple people on this thread have posted to go at non-peak times or when kids are in school. Exactly how is a working mom supposed to pull that off- the assumptions on here are just crazy privileged.

The main even could be the walk to the playground to blow off the energy, with them getting to ride on the infant swing or something else. Take the stroller or carrier in case they get too worn out to make it home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To all the moms of babies/ young toddlers on the playground- this is something you can't really realize until your kids are older (I certainly didn't realize it), but older kids (say, age 4 and up) really NEED the playground. It's built for kids to climb and run and yell and play independently. That's what school aged kids NEED, especially after a day of Kindergarten or first grade that is too much sit down time for little kids. A 21 month old can get stimulation and age appropriate fun truly by just being at the park and running in the grass, seeing things and people, picking up leaves. Also- they can go to these playgrounds when older kids are in school.

It's kind of like the moms who take their 4 months old to a mommy and me music class. The kid does not need a mommy and me music class- the parent just wants to get out there and "do stuff" with their baby, which I get, because I was that mom at first too. An under 2 year old baby/young toddler doesn't need to be on the playground if it's busy.

Okay one more thing, multiple people on this thread have posted to go at non-peak times or when kids are in school. Exactly how is a working mom supposed to pull that off- the assumptions on here are just crazy privileged.

We managed when I was working. You just have to find a less busy playground. They exist. Not all are near home. Or go when other families are at dinner, crack of dawn on the weekend, or on rare afternoon you leave early. It’s not ideal, but it’s when these places are more chill. You could also find a soft play room geared towards smaller kids.

This is crazy. A mom and 21 month old shouldn’t have to be driving around two towns over in after school traffic to go to a less crowded playground gor a soft room geared toward tots. If you have a young toddler, go to the playground, but just go to one with more room to explore or stick to safer spots like the sandbox.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To all the moms of babies/ young toddlers on the playground- this is something you can't really realize until your kids are older (I certainly didn't realize it), but older kids (say, age 4 and up) really NEED the playground. It's built for kids to climb and run and yell and play independently. That's what school aged kids NEED, especially after a day of Kindergarten or first grade that is too much sit down time for little kids. A 21 month old can get stimulation and age appropriate fun truly by just being at the park and running in the grass, seeing things and people, picking up leaves. Also- they can go to these playgrounds when older kids are in school.

It's kind of like the moms who take their 4 months old to a mommy and me music class. The kid does not need a mommy and me music class- the parent just wants to get out there and "do stuff" with their baby, which I get, because I was that mom at first too. An under 2 year old baby/young toddler doesn't need to be on the playground if it's busy.

Okay one more thing, multiple people on this thread have posted to go at non-peak times or when kids are in school. Exactly how is a working mom supposed to pull that off- the assumptions on here are just crazy privileged.

We managed when I was working. You just have to find a less busy playground. They exist. Not all are near home. Or go when other families are at dinner, crack of dawn on the weekend, or on rare afternoon you leave early. It’s not ideal, but it’s when these places are more chill. You could also find a soft play room geared towards smaller kids.

This is crazy. A mom and 21 month old shouldn’t have to be driving around two towns over in after school traffic to go to a less crowded playground gor a soft room geared toward tots. If you have a young toddler, go to the playground, but just go to one with more room to explore or stick to safer spots like the sandbox.

Way to overreact. We went to the one four blocks away instead of at elementary across the street....setting realistic expectations for access makes more sense though. To be honest I didn’t let my toddler play in sandbox, so much pee and who knows what in there.

[Anonymous]

If the playground is busy, there is often a flat blacktop area nearby or latch of grass to play catch or roll ball in. It’s not all or nothing with play structures. When our daughter was small she liked to watch the big kids. I’d guard her with my legs and we’d practice walking. If it got too wild I’d pick her up. If any kids were zooming around we’d move to a quiet spot, then the next quiet spot, then the next...because the wild migrates. It’s all ok. Adapting yourself model resilience too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will freely admit that I do not usually intervene when my kid commits a routine playground faux-pas like climbing the slide. You know why? I am tired and it is not a huge deal at the end of the day. With my 2yo, I intervene because it is usually a safety issue. With a 5yo, though? No. They can figure it out themselves.

I completely realize this is selfish and that most of you probably find it extremely annoying. I find the people who are constantly intervening in the social dynamics of elementary-school-aged kids annoying as well.

I was just thinking as I read the OP, "I let my 4 year old climb the slide......" I figure he and the other kids can work it out. Either they will take turns, or they will all decide to climb up instead of slide down, or vice versa, or someone will get kicked and i'll say "yup, sometimes that happens when you climb the slide when it's crowded... people coming down have first dibs". I actually really dislike when other parents correct children climbing the slide (who aren't their own). "Ok guys... slides aren't for climbing! Little Larlo (their own child, always) is waiting patiently to slide down!" Like ok... let them wait patiently. What's wrong with this?

OP again and I let my kid climb up the slide when there aren't any other kids trying to use it. But if I see a kid at the top of the slide ready to go down, and my kid starts climbing up it, I'm going to intervene. Why is my kid so special that he gets to do whatever the heck he wants, regardless of the other kids that are waiting?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will freely admit that I do not usually intervene when my kid commits a routine playground faux-pas like climbing the slide. You know why? I am tired and it is not a huge deal at the end of the day. With my 2yo, I intervene because it is usually a safety issue. With a 5yo, though? No. They can figure it out themselves.

I completely realize this is selfish and that most of you probably find it extremely annoying. I find the people who are constantly intervening in the social dynamics of elementary-school-aged kids annoying as well.

I was just thinking as I read the OP, "I let my 4 year old climb the slide......" I figure he and the other kids can work it out. Either they will take turns, or they will all decide to climb up instead of slide down, or vice versa, or someone will get kicked and i'll say "yup, sometimes that happens when you climb the slide when it's crowded... people coming down have first dibs". I actually really dislike when other parents correct children climbing the slide (who aren't their own). "Ok guys... slides aren't for climbing! Little Larlo (their own child, always) is waiting patiently to slide down!" Like ok... let them wait patiently. What's wrong with this?

OP again and I let my kid climb up the slide when there aren't any other kids trying to use it. But if I see a kid at the top of the slide ready to go down, and my kid starts climbing up it, I'm going to intervene. Why is my kid so special that he gets to do whatever the heck he wants, regardless of the other kids that are waiting?

Apparently from all the responses here- the other kids are more important since they are older and in school and that they should work it out "cooperatively".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will freely admit that I do not usually intervene when my kid commits a routine playground faux-pas like climbing the slide. You know why? I am tired and it is not a huge deal at the end of the day. With my 2yo, I intervene because it is usually a safety issue. With a 5yo, though? No. They can figure it out themselves.

I completely realize this is selfish and that most of you probably find it extremely annoying. I find the people who are constantly intervening in the social dynamics of elementary-school-aged kids annoying as well.

I was just thinking as I read the OP, "I let my 4 year old climb the slide......" I figure he and the other kids can work it out. Either they will take turns, or they will all decide to climb up instead of slide down, or vice versa, or someone will get kicked and i'll say "yup, sometimes that happens when you climb the slide when it's crowded... people coming down have first dibs". I actually really dislike when other parents correct children climbing the slide (who aren't their own). "Ok guys... slides aren't for climbing! Little Larlo (their own child, always) is waiting patiently to slide down!" Like ok... let them wait patiently. What's wrong with this?

OP again and I let my kid climb up the slide when there aren't any other kids trying to use it. But if I see a kid at the top of the slide ready to go down, and my kid starts climbing up it, I'm going to intervene. Why is my kid so special that he gets to do whatever the heck he wants, regardless of the other kids that are waiting?

Neither kid is more important than the other. Just let them work it out. They are at school all day without you- they know how to work it out!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will freely admit that I do not usually intervene when my kid commits a routine playground faux-pas like climbing the slide. You know why? I am tired and it is not a huge deal at the end of the day. With my 2yo, I intervene because it is usually a safety issue. With a 5yo, though? No. They can figure it out themselves.

I completely realize this is selfish and that most of you probably find it extremely annoying. I find the people who are constantly intervening in the social dynamics of elementary-school-aged kids annoying as well.

I was just thinking as I read the OP, "I let my 4 year old climb the slide......" I figure he and the other kids can work it out. Either they will take turns, or they will all decide to climb up instead of slide down, or vice versa, or someone will get kicked and i'll say "yup, sometimes that happens when you climb the slide when it's crowded... people coming down have first dibs". I actually really dislike when other parents correct children climbing the slide (who aren't their own). "Ok guys... slides aren't for climbing! Little Larlo (their own child, always) is waiting patiently to slide down!" Like ok... let them wait patiently. What's wrong with this?

OP again and I let my kid climb up the slide when there aren't any other kids trying to use it. But if I see a kid at the top of the slide ready to go down, and my kid starts climbing up it, I'm going to intervene. Why is my kid so special that he gets to do whatever the heck he wants, regardless of the other kids that are waiting?

Apparently from all the responses here- the other kids are more important since they are older and in school and that they should work it out "cooperatively".

-salty mother of 21 month old

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will freely admit that I do not usually intervene when my kid commits a routine playground faux-pas like climbing the slide. You know why? I am tired and it is not a huge deal at the end of the day. With my 2yo, I intervene because it is usually a safety issue. With a 5yo, though? No. They can figure it out themselves.

I completely realize this is selfish and that most of you probably find it extremely annoying. I find the people who are constantly intervening in the social dynamics of elementary-school-aged kids annoying as well.

I was just thinking as I read the OP, "I let my 4 year old climb the slide......" I figure he and the other kids can work it out. Either they will take turns, or they will all decide to climb up instead of slide down, or vice versa, or someone will get kicked and i'll say "yup, sometimes that happens when you climb the slide when it's crowded... people coming down have first dibs". I actually really dislike when other parents correct children climbing the slide (who aren't their own). "Ok guys... slides aren't for climbing! Little Larlo (their own child, always) is waiting patiently to slide down!" Like ok... let them wait patiently. What's wrong with this?

OP again and I let my kid climb up the slide when there aren't any other kids trying to use it. But if I see a kid at the top of the slide ready to go down, and my kid starts climbing up it, I'm going to intervene. Why is my kid so special that he gets to do whatever the heck he wants, regardless of the other kids that are waiting?

Neither kid is more important than the other. Just let them work it out. They are at school all day without you- they know how to work it out!

My kids are 2 & 4 so maybe we’re just not at that stage yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will freely admit that I do not usually intervene when my kid commits a routine playground faux-pas like climbing the slide. You know why? I am tired and it is not a huge deal at the end of the day. With my 2yo, I intervene because it is usually a safety issue. With a 5yo, though? No. They can figure it out themselves.

I completely realize this is selfish and that most of you probably find it extremely annoying. I find the people who are constantly intervening in the social dynamics of elementary-school-aged kids annoying as well.

I was just thinking as I read the OP, "I let my 4 year old climb the slide......" I figure he and the other kids can work it out. Either they will take turns, or they will all decide to climb up instead of slide down, or vice versa, or someone will get kicked and i'll say "yup, sometimes that happens when you climb the slide when it's crowded... people coming down have first dibs". I actually really dislike when other parents correct children climbing the slide (who aren't their own). "Ok guys... slides aren't for climbing! Little Larlo (their own child, always) is waiting patiently to slide down!" Like ok... let them wait patiently. What's wrong with this?

OP again and I let my kid climb up the slide when there aren't any other kids trying to use it. But if I see a kid at the top of the slide ready to go down, and my kid starts climbing up it, I'm going to intervene. Why is my kid so special that he gets to do whatever the heck he wants, regardless of the other kids that are waiting?

Neither kid is more important than the other. Just let them work it out. They are at school all day without you- they know how to work it out!

My kids are 2 & 4 so maybe we’re just not at that stage yet.

And before I could be more hands off on the playground- like with a 2 year od- I'd just redirect him if older kids were playing with the equipment in a way that made it hard for my 2 year old to also play with it. There were usually toddler/baby areas on the playground that the big kids weren't interested in anyways that we could easily gravitate towards. If my 2 year old is trying to go down the larger twisty slide that a bunch of 6 year olds are playing on, I would just move my 2 year old.

[Anonymous]

You are all going to look back in a few years and realize how ridiculous you sound.
My kids are not even old at all - eight and five – and I cannot roll my eyes hard enough at this thread.