How to de-lazify new husband?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had the displeasure of discovering that my newly minted husband is lazy. He does work long hours at his jobbut after that he is useless. We recently moved into a new apartment and its been 2 months and he still hasn't unpacked 2 boxes full of his clothes, nor has he gone through and sorted through 2 other boxes full of his electronics and wires and odds and ends. In addition, he does not see dirt and disorder. He can live with a moldy shower and gross sink for years unless I specifically remind him to do his chores. I know it would be easy for me to just take on his chores but I do not want to end up like that. However, when I remind him that it is his turn to clean the bathroon he will get annoyed and huff and puff.

He is 30 years old.

I woke up at 6:00 am because I thought about all this and couldn't go back to sleep. This is very unattractive and I want out.

Yes I see he is last but works long hours? I guess those long work hours do not count because he is not working for you. Do you work?

Ehhhhh. My husband has ADD and can't get his tasks completed at work in a normal 8 hour shift that everyone else works, so he stays late. Work smarter, not longer!

At my job, I see plenty of guys that stay late to get out of the drudgery of cooking, bathing and reading to children. They make sure to time it so they get home around 7pm when all those tasks are done and then they can just watch netflix the rest of the night.

Haha.

And don’t forget how they disappear into the bathroom toilet with their iPhone from 6:30am-7:30am to avoid the kids’ morning routine too.

[Anonymous]

Hire a daily maid & let him know he will be paying for her out of his own pocketbook.

That should change things.

And make sure you do it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hire a daily maid & let him know he will be paying for her out of his own pocketbook.

That should change things.

And make sure you do it!

His pocketbook = her pocketbook so ...?

[Anonymous]

He won’t change unless he sees it as fortifying the marriage.
You should definitely hire cleaners.
And I know you just moved but until he pitches in, somehow you need a place with two master suites. He can sleep dress and get ready in his own filth in between cleaning days. You can sleep and do marriage “business” in your room then send him on his way. Not sure what to do about common areas. More than your share I guess to keep the peace.
Sorry for your situation!