Spanking?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you use violence on a defenseless child? It is horrible to even think about. I understand that many parents do it because they lack resources and don't know any better, but for an educated parent to do this is pretty inexcusable.

Life is violent. Kids are violent. Some kids don't respond to the modern forms of discipline. Some kids do actually need to be a bit fearful of authority.

Life is as violent as you make it. Mine is not at all violent, and my kids are extremely well behaved, and not violent.

Let's be very clear here - if you hit your children you are the one bringing the violence into their lives.

A properly administered spanking is not violent. A little painful, sure, but not violent.

Of course it is violent. Hitting someone with the intention of hurting someone is obviously violent.

No, it's not violent. It's controlled, and moderated.

vi·o·lence
?v?(?)l?ns/Submit
noun
behavior involving physical force intended to hurt, damage, or kill someone or something.
synonyms: brutality, brute force, ferocity, savagery, cruelty, sadism, barbarity, brutishness

Thanks for the definition. This doesn't qualify. It is not brutal, ferocious, savage, cruel, barbaric, etc.

It is "intended to hurt, damage." Violence per se.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you don't think there's plenty of spanking going on in those countries, you're crazy and naïve.

For the vast majority of those countries "banning corporal punishment" is just a means to enable prosecutors to punish egregious abuse, the level of which nobody on here would endorse or tolerate.

They have not effectively banned moderate spanking.

You are moving the goal post.

In 42 countries, hitting your child is ILLEGAL. It is widely acknowledged and agreed to be violent, criminal behavior.

No, you're just wrong. It's like saying driving 56 miles an hour is widely acknowledged criminal behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you use violence on a defenseless child? It is horrible to even think about. I understand that many parents do it because they lack resources and don't know any better, but for an educated parent to do this is pretty inexcusable.

Life is violent. Kids are violent. Some kids don't respond to the modern forms of discipline. Some kids do actually need to be a bit fearful of authority.

Life is as violent as you make it. Mine is not at all violent, and my kids are extremely well behaved, and not violent.

Let's be very clear here - if you hit your children you are the one bringing the violence into their lives.

A properly administered spanking is not violent. A little painful, sure, but not violent.

Of course it is violent. Hitting someone with the intention of hurting someone is obviously violent.

No, it's not violent. It's controlled, and moderated.

vi·o·lence
?v?(?)l?ns/Submit
noun
behavior involving physical force intended to hurt, damage, or kill someone or something.
synonyms: brutality, brute force, ferocity, savagery, cruelty, sadism, barbarity, brutishness

Thanks for the definition. This doesn't qualify. It is not brutal, ferocious, savage, cruel, barbaric, etc.

It is "intended to hurt, damage." Violence per se.

NP You're just making yourself out to be a tedious pedant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you use violence on a defenseless child? It is horrible to even think about. I understand that many parents do it because they lack resources and don't know any better, but for an educated parent to do this is pretty inexcusable.

Life is violent. Kids are violent. Some kids don't respond to the modern forms of discipline. Some kids do actually need to be a bit fearful of authority.

My life is not violent. My kids are not violent. I'm not violent. We do not condone or practice any kind of violence in our home, including hitting as discipline.

Spanking is illegal in many countries. Legality doesn't make it right.

I agree - of course the world is a violent place, but I can't relate to the PP's mindset. I've never been struck or otherwise physically harmed, nor have I ever struck or physically harmed another person.

You've NEVER been struck? Never fooled around, wrestling, slapped anyone or been slapped? Come on.

Not once in my life. I'm a 35-year-old woman. My DH played contact sports through college, and never was involved in any altercation outside the bounds of the sport. Never been in a fight nor was spanked as a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you use violence on a defenseless child? It is horrible to even think about. I understand that many parents do it because they lack resources and don't know any better, but for an educated parent to do this is pretty inexcusable.

Life is violent. Kids are violent. Some kids don't respond to the modern forms of discipline. Some kids do actually need to be a bit fearful of authority.

My life is not violent. My kids are not violent. I'm not violent. We do not condone or practice any kind of violence in our home, including hitting as discipline.

Spanking is illegal in many countries. Legality doesn't make it right.

I agree - of course the world is a violent place, but I can't relate to the PP's mindset. I've never been struck or otherwise physically harmed, nor have I ever struck or physically harmed another person.

You've NEVER been struck? Never fooled around, wrestling, slapped anyone or been slapped? Come on.

Not once in my life. I'm a 35-year-old woman. My DH played contact sports through college, and never was involved in any altercation outside the bounds of the sport. Never been in a fight nor was spanked as a child.

You guys are snowflakes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you use violence on a defenseless child? It is horrible to even think about. I understand that many parents do it because they lack resources and don't know any better, but for an educated parent to do this is pretty inexcusable.

Life is violent. Kids are violent. Some kids don't respond to the modern forms of discipline. Some kids do actually need to be a bit fearful of authority.

My life is not violent. My kids are not violent. I'm not violent. We do not condone or practice any kind of violence in our home, including hitting as discipline.

Spanking is illegal in many countries. Legality doesn't make it right.

I agree - of course the world is a violent place, but I can't relate to the PP's mindset. I've never been struck or otherwise physically harmed, nor have I ever struck or physically harmed another person.

You've NEVER been struck? Never fooled around, wrestling, slapped anyone or been slapped? Come on.

See.... I can't relate. Did you not have siblings? Have you not ever thrown anything in anger?

look, in a utopian world, I do not think people should spank. I don't think we live in that world. And I think we all have to deal with a lot of people every day who could use a spanking.

+1

+2 My DH was spanked, and he's not a violent person. I was actually abused and know the difference between abuse and a quick swat on the bottom.

When you liken a quick swat on the bottom to abuse, you are insulting the word "abuse".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I refuse to spank our DD. My father spanked me from before the time I even understood what was happening. I used to hide under the bed whenever he came home from work because I associated him with hitting me.

I think parents who spank their children are too lazy to really discipline their kids. It's a heck of a lot easier to just smack your child to get them to shut up or do something you want rather than to figure out what's causing a particular behavior.

There's certainly some of that going on, but it doesn't describe what we're talking about here. Nobody here is smacking their kids just to get them to "shut up" or "do something you want."

It's a deliberate punishment to deter egregious or particularly disobedient behavior.

No. They hit them if they don't go to bed, if they act up at dinner, if they won't put their toys away. They are not spanking them because they did something egregious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you use violence on a defenseless child? It is horrible to even think about. I understand that many parents do it because they lack resources and don't know any better, but for an educated parent to do this is pretty inexcusable.

Life is violent. Kids are violent. Some kids don't respond to the modern forms of discipline. Some kids do actually need to be a bit fearful of authority.

My life is not violent. My kids are not violent. I'm not violent. We do not condone or practice any kind of violence in our home, including hitting as discipline.

Spanking is illegal in many countries. Legality doesn't make it right.

I agree - of course the world is a violent place, but I can't relate to the PP's mindset. I've never been struck or otherwise physically harmed, nor have I ever struck or physically harmed another person.

You've NEVER been struck? Never fooled around, wrestling, slapped anyone or been slapped? Come on.

Not once in my life. I'm a 35-year-old woman. My DH played contact sports through college, and never was involved in any altercation outside the bounds of the sport. Never been in a fight nor was spanked as a child.

OP. We have to do what works for each of us, and all kids are different. There's no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh god. So barbaric, and so low class. Literally one of the trashiest parenting moves out there. Not to mention sickening

What is actually low class is having kids who need to be spanked, and are entitled and tedious, yet their parents are so desperately trying to be UMC and enlightened that they don't discipline them.

In the actual upper classes, spanking is incredibly common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you use violence on a defenseless child? It is horrible to even think about. I understand that many parents do it because they lack resources and don't know any better, but for an educated parent to do this is pretty inexcusable.

Life is violent. Kids are violent. Some kids don't respond to the modern forms of discipline. Some kids do actually need to be a bit fearful of authority.

My life is not violent. My kids are not violent. I'm not violent. We do not condone or practice any kind of violence in our home, including hitting as discipline.

Spanking is illegal in many countries. Legality doesn't make it right.

I agree - of course the world is a violent place, but I can't relate to the PP's mindset. I've never been struck or otherwise physically harmed, nor have I ever struck or physically harmed another person.

You've NEVER been struck? Never fooled around, wrestling, slapped anyone or been slapped? Come on.

See.... I can't relate. Did you not have siblings? Have you not ever thrown anything in anger?

look, in a utopian world, I do not think people should spank. I don't think we live in that world. And I think we all have to deal with a lot of people every day who could use a spanking.

+1

+2 My DH was spanked, and he's not a violent person. I was actually abused and know the difference between abuse and a quick swat on the bottom.

When you liken a quick swat on the bottom to abuse, you are insulting the word "abuse".

This is so true. It's insulting to call moderate spanking "abuse."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh god. So barbaric, and so low class. Literally one of the trashiest parenting moves out there. Not to mention sickening

What is actually low class is having kids who need to be spanked, and are entitled and tedious, yet their parents are so desperately trying to be UMC and enlightened that they don't discipline them.

In the actual upper classes, spanking is incredibly common.

How do you know this? Genuine question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I refuse to spank our DD. My father spanked me from before the time I even understood what was happening. I used to hide under the bed whenever he came home from work because I associated him with hitting me.

I think parents who spank their children are too lazy to really discipline their kids. It's a heck of a lot easier to just smack your child to get them to shut up or do something you want rather than to figure out what's causing a particular behavior.

There's certainly some of that going on, but it doesn't describe what we're talking about here. Nobody here is smacking their kids just to get them to "shut up" or "do something you want."

It's a deliberate punishment to deter egregious or particularly disobedient behavior.

No. They hit them if they don't go to bed, if they act up at dinner, if they won't put their toys away. They are not spanking them because they did something egregious.

where on earth did you get this? I am one of the posters that said I spanked for a period for dangerous, scary and tough to stop behaviors. Not putting away toys? Please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh god. So barbaric, and so low class. Literally one of the trashiest parenting moves out there. Not to mention sickening

What is actually low class is having kids who need to be spanked, and are entitled and tedious, yet their parents are so desperately trying to be UMC and enlightened that they don't discipline them.

In the actual upper classes, spanking is incredibly common.

How do you know this? Genuine question.

Having gone to boarding school, and having friends that had similar upbringings. We all got spanked. Most of us spank occasionally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh god. So barbaric, and so low class. Literally one of the trashiest parenting moves out there. Not to mention sickening

What is actually low class is having kids who need to be spanked, and are entitled and tedious, yet their parents are so desperately trying to be UMC and enlightened that they don't discipline them.

In the actual upper classes, spanking is incredibly common.

How do you know this? Genuine question.

Having gone to boarding school, and having friends that had similar upbringings. We all got spanked. Most of us spank occasionally.

Is there a particular way the upper classes spank? Do they have the nanny do it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh god. So barbaric, and so low class. Literally one of the trashiest parenting moves out there. Not to mention sickening

What is actually low class is having kids who need to be spanked, and are entitled and tedious, yet their parents are so desperately trying to be UMC and enlightened that they don't discipline them.

In the actual upper classes, spanking is incredibly common.

How do you know this? Genuine question.

Having gone to boarding school, and having friends that had similar upbringings. We all got spanked. Most of us spank occasionally.

People who abandon their kids also hit them.

Insightful.