Would you be a sugar baby?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I did this recently and have been regretting it. I don't suggest this.

Is this Kept Woman?

No, I met guys through seeking arrangement. Got my tuition fully paid off. I just think money changes everything. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone.

Why wouldn't you recommend it?

Personally, I'd advise good friends to stay away from a scene in which men pay women to explicitly cater to their needs, physical, emotional, or otherwise . They will expect all kinds of stuff in bed. Are you comfortable giving him bjs every time you have sex? It's not an equal relationship.

I'm not suffering from psychological problems or anything like this. Am married to a very sweet guy now. I just wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Better to enjoy your youth with someone who wants a real relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a professional woman with two graduate degrees in her early 40s with loans and credit card bills that were used to support my basic living expenses in my 20s (rent, books, etc.) that I feel I will never, ever, ever get out from underneath of, I say go for it. I am shackled with debt even though I've had a job since I was 13 and I don't live beyond my means. But I have gotten a great education and lived in more expensive cities and, like you, have made something of myself despite my poverty-stricken childhood with a mentally ill single parent. My only regret is that I didn't do something like this when I was younger. And you really have none of the concerns that would worry me--trying to establish this relationship with a stranger, trying to do this with someone you found physically revolting or someone whose company you didn't enjoy. He's a nice guy who you already know isn't a freak. He's ok in bed. He's done this before. GO FOR IT.

But, I really would just embrace it and do it right. Screw feeling too morally shy to get a good deal for yourself. If you're doing it, do it smart. Tuition PLUS other stuff--not "gifts" and not cash. Tangible stuff. Like rent. And have it paid in advance (it will help take out the transactional nature of it). And you two need a real conversation re: whether you are permitted to date others and also talk birth control and STD protection. And have an end date. It will be helpful to you both. The exit is the thing that could get really, really messy. For both of you. What if you want out and he doesn't? Vice versa. Have clear conversations now so it's workable when it ends. And good luck.

And when it's over, don't look back. You are alone in this world. You did what you needed to do and it doesn't have to define who you will be later.

Why don't you prostitute yourself today to pay off your debts then?

LOL, getting two grad degrees was probably a bit much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a professional woman with two graduate degrees in her early 40s with loans and credit card bills that were used to support my basic living expenses in my 20s (rent, books, etc.) that I feel I will never, ever, ever get out from underneath of, I say go for it. I am shackled with debt even though I've had a job since I was 13 and I don't live beyond my means. But I have gotten a great education and lived in more expensive cities and, like you, have made something of myself despite my poverty-stricken childhood with a mentally ill single parent. My only regret is that I didn't do something like this when I was younger. And you really have none of the concerns that would worry me--trying to establish this relationship with a stranger, trying to do this with someone you found physically revolting or someone whose company you didn't enjoy. He's a nice guy who you already know isn't a freak. He's ok in bed. He's done this before. GO FOR IT.

But, I really would just embrace it and do it right. Screw feeling too morally shy to get a good deal for yourself. If you're doing it, do it smart. Tuition PLUS other stuff--not "gifts" and not cash. Tangible stuff. Like rent. And have it paid in advance (it will help take out the transactional nature of it). And you two need a real conversation re: whether you are permitted to date others and also talk birth control and STD protection. And have an end date. It will be helpful to you both. The exit is the thing that could get really, really messy. For both of you. What if you want out and he doesn't? Vice versa. Have clear conversations now so it's workable when it ends. And good luck.

And when it's over, don't look back. You are alone in this world. You did what you needed to do and it doesn't have to define who you will be later.

Why don't you prostitute yourself today to pay off your debts then?

LOL, getting two grad degrees was probably a bit much.[/quotle]

So as a mom would you recommend this to your daughter?

[Anonymous]

I would recommend my daughter be smarter in her pursuits of academic credentials.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would recommend my daughter be smarter in her pursuits of academic credentials.

So the answer is no. I know I would be horrified if my daughter did this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I am very much a prude. But this is nothing more than a friend with benefit with more benefits.

You know him, you care for him. You don't love him or want to spend the rest of your life with him.

I think you need an exit plan but otherwise go for it.

No, Friends with Benefits is not one person paying another person for sex. That's called something else.

The question is, would she have a sexual relationship with this man absent the cash? If the answer is no, then...

Better to have uncommitted sex and no payout than uncommitted sex and a payout?

You're weird.

Sex for money is prostitution. The prostitute is only doing it for the money. Sex between 2 consenting adults is either dating, having a fling or a number of possibilities but it doesn't include money for sex.

I actually view prostitution as an opportunity for men/woman to have sex with a woman/man without any strings, not calls, not stalking ... it comes with a fee.

OP is not just having sex, they are going to dinner, movies and having a genuine caring relationship. That is not part of prostitution.

A caring relationship contracted for a fee is not a caring relationship. As many have said, if she's unwilling to have this same caring relationship without getting the cash, then it is what it is.

From what I read, the OP is having a caring relationship with this guy. They are friends. They care for each other. They actually have sex... when they are drunk... which is okay as long as he does not give her any money????? That is silly.

I love how women think it is okay to have sex with multiple guys as long as the guy gives you nothing in return... not even a phone call... it's women's liberation all screwed (pun intended ) up. Look at me... I have sex with no strings attached ... just like men... bully for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a professional woman with two graduate degrees in her early 40s with loans and credit card bills that were used to support my basic living expenses in my 20s (rent, books, etc.) that I feel I will never, ever, ever get out from underneath of, I say go for it. I am shackled with debt even though I've had a job since I was 13 and I don't live beyond my means. But I have gotten a great education and lived in more expensive cities and, like you, have made something of myself despite my poverty-stricken childhood with a mentally ill single parent. My only regret is that I didn't do something like this when I was younger. And you really have none of the concerns that would worry me--trying to establish this relationship with a stranger, trying to do this with someone you found physically revolting or someone whose company you didn't enjoy. He's a nice guy who you already know isn't a freak. He's ok in bed. He's done this before. GO FOR IT.

But, I really would just embrace it and do it right. Screw feeling too morally shy to get a good deal for yourself. If you're doing it, do it smart. Tuition PLUS other stuff--not "gifts" and not cash. Tangible stuff. Like rent. And have it paid in advance (it will help take out the transactional nature of it). And you two need a real conversation re: whether you are permitted to date others and also talk birth control and STD protection. And have an end date. It will be helpful to you both. The exit is the thing that could get really, really messy. For both of you. What if you want out and he doesn't? Vice versa. Have clear conversations now so it's workable when it ends. And good luck.

And when it's over, don't look back. You are alone in this world. You did what you needed to do and it doesn't have to define who you will be later.

Totally agree.
THIS is the advice you need to take, OP.

No one HAS to be a prostitute

True. A surprising number of people manage to attend and graduate from college without resorting to prostitution. Every year.

OP, this isn't the only way you can finish school. It's merely the easy way. If you're OK with that then have at it. It's your life and your decision.

Yea, there mom's did the dirty work, screwing somebody who paid for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would recommend my daughter be smarter in her pursuits of academic credentials.

So the answer is no. I know I would be horrified if my daughter did this.

You would be horrified if your daughter dated a guy who did things for her that cost money that she could not afford to do? So your daughter can't move in with a guy and he pay the rent?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would recommend my daughter be smarter in her pursuits of academic credentials.

So the answer is no. I know I would be horrified if my daughter did this.

You would be horrified if your daughter dated a guy who did things for her that cost money that she could not afford to do? So your daughter can't move in with a guy and he pay the rent?

This is not what op is thinking about doing here.

[Anonymous]

I have friends who have done this (the sugarbaby side), and I have also done it from the sugardaddy side. In my case, I don't ever hand anyone $$, but we go out to very nice restaurants/events, and I buy them nice gifts. The arrangement is sort of unspoken, but both sides are open about the other side's situation outside of the arrangement.

As long as both sides are clear about the situation and boundaries are clear, I see nothing wrong with it.

[Anonymous]

If this was a thing when I was in college, I would have totally done it. Sorry that I am too old now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a professional woman with two graduate degrees in her early 40s with loans and credit card bills that were used to support my basic living expenses in my 20s (rent, books, etc.) that I feel I will never, ever, ever get out from underneath of, I say go for it. I am shackled with debt even though I've had a job since I was 13 and I don't live beyond my means. But I have gotten a great education and lived in more expensive cities and, like you, have made something of myself despite my poverty-stricken childhood with a mentally ill single parent. My only regret is that I didn't do something like this when I was younger. And you really have none of the concerns that would worry me--trying to establish this relationship with a stranger, trying to do this with someone you found physically revolting or someone whose company you didn't enjoy. He's a nice guy who you already know isn't a freak. He's ok in bed. He's done this before. GO FOR IT.

But, I really would just embrace it and do it right. Screw feeling too morally shy to get a good deal for yourself. If you're doing it, do it smart. Tuition PLUS other stuff--not "gifts" and not cash. Tangible stuff. Like rent. And have it paid in advance (it will help take out the transactional nature of it). And you two need a real conversation re: whether you are permitted to date others and also talk birth control and STD protection. And have an end date. It will be helpful to you both. The exit is the thing that could get really, really messy. For both of you. What if you want out and he doesn't? Vice versa. Have clear conversations now so it's workable when it ends. And good luck.

And when it's over, don't look back. You are alone in this world. You did what you needed to do and it doesn't have to define who you will be later.

Totally agree.
THIS is the advice you need to take, OP.

No one HAS to be a prostitute

True. A surprising number of people manage to attend and graduate from college without resorting to prostitution. Every year.

OP, this isn't the only way you can finish school. It's merely the easy way. If you're OK with that then have at it. It's your life and your decision.

Yea, there mom's did the dirty work, screwing somebody who paid for it.

PP, you have a very distorted view of marriage. Also, it's very likely that the mother also contributed financially to the child's education. This comment is so wrong in so many ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have friends who have done this (the sugarbaby side), and I have also done it from the sugardaddy side. In my case, I don't ever hand anyone $$, but we go out to very nice restaurants/events, and I buy them nice gifts. The arrangement is sort of unspoken, but both sides are open about the other side's situation outside of the arrangement.

As long as both sides are clear about the situation and boundaries are clear, I see nothing wrong with it.

You see nothing wrong with it because you've never felt desperate enough to think you had to sell your body to pay tuition. She isn't looking for nice dinners or gifts. She is feeling hopeless and like she has no alternative except to become a prostitute. I think it's really sad and she should get a loan from this guy or get a better paying job. She has options and she should not sell herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would recommend my daughter be smarter in her pursuits of academic credentials.

So the answer is no. I know I would be horrified if my daughter did this.

You would be horrified if your daughter dated a guy who did things for her that cost money that she could not afford to do? So your daughter can't move in with a guy and he pay the rent?

This is not what op is thinking about doing here.

Agree. Many are trying to whitewash the OP's plan as simply moving in with a boyfriend who's going to help her out.

The proposal is nothing like that. This isn't her boyfriend. It's a business proposition. You have sex with me on a certain schedule and I'll pay you for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would recommend my daughter be smarter in her pursuits of academic credentials.

So the answer is no. I know I would be horrified if my daughter did this.

You would be horrified if your daughter dated a guy who did things for her that cost money that she could not afford to do? So your daughter can't move in with a guy and he pay the rent?

This is not what op is thinking about doing here.

Agree. Many are trying to whitewash the OP's plan as simply moving in with a boyfriend who's going to help her out.

The proposal is nothing like that. This isn't her boyfriend. It's a business proposition. You have sex with me on a certain schedule and I'll pay you for it.

Make a schedule and get to it. Time is tickin'! Can't be a sugar baby much longer. Plan B