why do so many of you expect family to help

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What the hell is wrong with you people? I don't "expect" help, but I am grateful that my family isn't full of miserly horrible people like all of you. We all pitch in to help each other out because we're family and we love, care about, and respect each other. I WANT to spend time with my nieces and nephews and my siblings and IL's want to spend time with mine.

People like you suck.

Ditto.

Totally agree. So sad for these people who have no one who doesn't keep track of who does what for who. Not everything's a burden - some of us love spending time with extended family. Imagine that!

[Anonymous]

I just think people with family close by tend to run them ragged. Not that they would admit this, of course.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I just think people with family close by tend to run them ragged. Not that they would admit this, of course.

How do you know whether their family is willing to help or not? How do you know those moms/aunts/sisters don't want to spend time with their grandchildren/nieces/nephews? You likely don't, and your assumptions/opinions aren't fact.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I just think people with family close by tend to run them ragged. Not that they would admit this, of course.

+1

[Anonymous]

Not only do I have no family close by that can help, I have to take care of an ailing parent as well as my children. I am insanely jealous and envious of people who have family members that help.

That said, if I did have family that could help, I would not expect them to do so. I do think it is odd, though, that the OP assumes that people expect family to help. I would help other family members if I could. That's what family is all about. If someone were to abuse this privilege, I would grow a spine and politely tell them that I have other things to do. It's not that difficult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not only do I have no family close by that can help, I have to take care of an ailing parent as well as my children. I am insanely jealous and envious of people who have family members that help.

That said, if I did have family that could help, I would not expect them to do so. I do think it is odd, though, that the OP assumes that people expect family to help. I would help other family members if I could. That's what family is all about. If someone were to abuse this privilege, I would grow a spine and politely tell them that I have other things to do. It's not that difficult.

Amen for reason! PP hit it on the nose.

[Anonymous]

We've now come to the part of the thread where people are clearly agreeing with themselves. Time to end.

[Anonymous]

Its not that difficult for you pp. But the people I know definitely take advantage of any family nearby. And they don't want to hear that others know about it, that's for sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its not that difficult for you pp. But the people I know definitely take advantage of any family nearby. And they don't want to hear that others know about it, that's for sure.

Mind your own damned business anyway! Jeez.

[Anonymous]

One word OP: L-A-Z-Y. They want to have their cake and eat it too. They have no idea how the real world works for what they have. And a generously paid babysitter is beyond comprehension.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One word OP: L-A-Z-Y. They want to have their cake and eat it too. They have no idea how the real world works for what they have. And a generously paid babysitter is beyond comprehension.

Jealous.

[Anonymous]

My ILs BEG to stay with our daughter. They call me every Sunday to ask if I have to go out of town during the upcoming week, and if so, can they keep my daughter. I def take advantage of that opportunity. And my daughter loves them. And they love her. It's not a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One word OP: L-A-Z-Y. They want to have their cake and eat it too. They have no idea how the real world works for what they have. And a generously paid babysitter is beyond comprehension.

I agree with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its not that difficult for you pp. But the people I know definitely take advantage of any family nearby. And they don't want to hear that others know about it, that's for sure.

Mind your own damned business anyway! Jeez.

Well, somebody's got some cognitive dissonance going on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are your kids, not mine. I never even asked, let alone expected, my parents or siblings to babysit or free childcare. My sister, 12 years older than me has a 29-yr old daughter who thinks I should help her with free childcare. What the hell is wrong woth this generation? Take cate of upur own kids!

Has it ever occurred to you that lots of people enjoy helping their relatives? In numerous cultures it is normal to assist relatives with child rearing. I think it's great when children grow up with extended relatives around. Everyone helps out and pitches in. Some folks even prepare meals, do household chores, go grocery shopping, etc. for other relatives when a newborn is born to give the parents time to rest and to bond with their baby. Not everyone feels comfortable having strangers taking care of their children. I don't mind helping my relatives and friends with their children. Actually, whenever I'm invited into someone's home I always asked, "Is there something I can help you with? or "Do you want me to look after the children while you cook dinner?" That's just the way I was raised. I like serving and helping others. There is nothing wrong or weird with extending a helping hand to a relative. I'm sorry that you're bitter because of other people's family structure and choices. If someone's relative offers to help take care of another relative's child what business is it of yours? I think people who don't have close knit loving families are just bitter and jealous. I'm convinced that some people make up their minds to be hateful towards the happiness of others. What a sad existence some folks live in.

If helping a relative with their children is what people consider wrong, then our society is truly disheartening.