Upset my date
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| I am a chick and this is the dumbest thing I have ever heard. If she didn't want you to eat her food, she could have just said no. She was either not that into you to begin with and needed an excuse, or she sucks. Either way, don't think twice about it. |
Anonymous
| She was a dinner-hoe on a foodie call. She was hoping to turn dinner with OP into two meals. |
Anonymous
|
ESH.
Eating off her plate (or even asking to do so in the first place) is weird and overly-familiar behavior on a second date. Don't do that again. Maybe it's fine once you get into an established relationship, but not on a second date. That said, she should have said no. "Actually, I'm planning to take this to work for lunch tomorrow." Not hard. |
Anonymous
If so she wouldn't be so stupid as to share. |
Anonymous
She didn't want to get revealed for who she really is. If she said "No," then OP would've wizened up to the game she was playing. She was probably going to string him along for another meal or two. |
Anonymous
Enjoy your own food, not someone else’s. |
Anonymous
Um, no. Did you read the OP? She told him she didn’t want to see him anymore. |
Anonymous
Only after he ate her meal! The entire point of going out with him was negated because he ate her food lol |
Anonymous
| Op-are you older? Like both of you? I have found that women in the 50+ range can be super nitpicky and weird about this kind of stuff. And I say that as a woman. Like they get it in their heads that if they are annoyed even a little bit about anything at all they need to end it. I think it comes from not wanting to compromise later in life. That being said-you didn’t do anything wrong. She should have said no if she didn’t want you eating her food. This is a her problem not a you problem. |
Anonymous
Agree, it is overly familiar and (for me) too casual for a second date. Gives the impression you were focused on your own hunger, or maybe even on thinking that since you'd paid, the food should get eaten. Even if that's not the thought behind it, OP, that's an impression it gives off, and impressions do still count on the second date. And frankly, for quite a while beyond that. I do disagree, though, with the many PPs blaming the woman for not saying right away, in the moment,"I want to take it home." Hindsight is always perfect and it's easy for us to think, "I'd do that immediately!" But in that moment, she might have been so surprised that he was even asking, that she just didn't say it, and she might have felt, "Well, if he's that into eating off my plate, he must want it and I"m not going to try to snatch it back...." We can all say about many situations, you should have spoken up then and there, but in reality, when you're the one IN that moment and someone does something you didn't expect, it's not always so easy to "use your words." Especially when it's something relatively small like this, it can sometimes feel like you should just let it go, then later you realize it really did matter to you. |
Anonymous
| This is why I always picked my boyfriends from a pool of acquaintances. Formally dating strangers is awful. |
Anonymous
I'm a woman and I agree. Although, second date and you did something that bothers her. Why not cut ties, I guess? |
Anonymous
I suspect she may have had other reasons for ending any further dating. I don't mean that in a nasty "He's awful" way at all. Just saying: If she liked him enough overall, she likely would not have stopped seeing him based on on this one example of bad manners on his part (which it was) plus hesitation to be frank with him (which she was). She may feel that she can't be herself around him enough to speak up, and he feels it's cool to be too loose and familiar on date two. Better for both to move on. |
Anonymous
+1 It's very seinfeld-y |
Anonymous
| OP, she sounds like a wonderful wizard of a woman, and you treated her as a warlock. Not by intention, but not without. Amirite? |