We are broke

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry for your struggles.

Just a quick reality check. Having an au pair will cost you roughly 25k a year (agency fees, weekly stipend, transportation, food, small perks, etc). It will be a few months before one arrives, unless you get an in-country au pair. So the time horizon may or may not work for your family.

It actually ends up costing quite a bit more than that

We’re in the process of hiring an au pair. I was told $9k up front and $200/week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry for your struggles.

Just a quick reality check. Having an au pair will cost you roughly 25k a year (agency fees, weekly stipend, transportation, food, small perks, etc). It will be a few months before one arrives, unless you get an in-country au pair. So the time horizon may or may not work for your family.

It actually ends up costing quite a bit more than that

We’re in the process of hiring an au pair. I was told $9k up front and $200/week.

What about food, extra utilities, taking her out to eat/carry out when you get it, activities, car insurance if she drives your car, etc?

[Anonymous]

Stop paying for pre-school. You are a teacher, you can do that yourself. We were short on money, so didn’t send our twins to preschool. I worked with them on kindergarten readiness skills and did a lot of free activities with them. Neither one suffered…and we saved a small fortune.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop paying for pre-school. You are a teacher, you can do that yourself. We were short on money, so didn’t send our twins to preschool. I worked with them on kindergarten readiness skills and did a lot of free activities with them. Neither one suffered…and we saved a small fortune.

This!

[Anonymous]

I just really want you to wake up to an encouraging post. Life is hard, especially in December, and many of these posters are not nice. (And I'm employed without autistic kids so totally different situation)

[Anonymous]

You can do this OP. I think the tutoring on weekdays idea is great or online homeschooling while your kids are in school. In the meantime, cut all subscriptions but one, no more take out, starbucks, sell all your baby stuff, sell a car if you have two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get an adjunct job for evenings at a local college. It’s not a great salary, but it’s very flexible and you can do it after your partner returns from work or while the kids are in preschool. Do that until they are all in school and then move to full time work.

That pays next to nothing, and OP probably isn’t qualified anyway.

Not a great salary, but the adjuncts i know make anywhere from $35-50/ hour with part time evening hours. Establishing a tutoring business takes time. Plus people want hours from 3-6 for tutoring snd she’ll have to hire a babysitter. She either needs to go back to work full time though, prob as a teacher.

[Anonymous]

I think I was the first poster to suggest cutting preschool and teaching your kids yourself. I want to add that I realize you may already paid for this year, or committed to paying for the full year, but this would save you money as soon as August next year, only 8 months away.

[Anonymous]

I am a former elementary teacher. After my kids were born, I took a break for their infant years, then taught preschool during their preschool years. At both preschools (two different states), I only had to pay half tuition for my child. The pay was not great—but that was outweighed by the convenience, matching schedule, reduced tuition, and low stress. Plus I could earn extra by doing the before care and after care programs—and my kid was allowed to participate in those at no added cost.

Can you start by subbing/doing aftercare at your child’s preschool? If not, can you find a PT job at another preschool—then next year go FT and switch your child to that school?

I stayed for the year my youngest was in K, and during that year took all the civil service exams I could so I would not have to go back to the grind and exhaustion of public school teaching. It worked. Definitely took a paycut but landed in a job related to education and my day ends at 4–no grading, no thinking about work outside of work, the time after the workday ends is mine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP. I don't know how much debt you have and how much you'd have to cut back to break even every month, but you are in some very expensive years. I think you said your kids will be in the same school in 2 years. Maybe you just don't travel until the kids are in school and you can sub full time at their school. Also, especially since you are an ES teacher, you could teach your kids preschool and not have to pay for that. Find local moms groups for play dates for the socialization. Sign them up for some county rec classes so they're familiar with being in a class setting and following a teacher's instructions. Preschool isn't necessary. It is $$$.

Seconding pk isn't necessary. Especially for someone who has a maaters in education

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've read and followed some of Ramsey's philosophies. He's great for getting out of debt, bad for long term investing.

Are you willing to post your budget here? There are probably places to cut and rearrange so you aren't broke. You may need to get a job opposite your DH so that you can bring in some income as well. Retail is hiring like mad and would be getting paid almost immediately.

You need a snowball to pay off the debt, but you need an emergency fund first.

This is the answer. 2nd (but not one that starts as early as 3:00 — they do exist) or 3rd shift. Almost no one on DCUM is ever willing to do it, though.

When my family’s financial situation looked grim I looked for nighttime jobs. I looked at night work at the hospitals, assisted-living, grocery stores and anywhere I could think of that I could work when my husband was home with the kids. My family did Dave Ramsays plan to a T and it was successful. You have to be committed to succeed, which means reframing your mentality and temporary sacrifices.

[Anonymous]

Short of the Hope diamond, your engagement ring isn't worth selling. You will get a tiny fraction of what you paid for it. I recommend shift work and a complete budget overhaul.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry for your struggles.

Just a quick reality check. Having an au pair will cost you roughly 25k a year (agency fees, weekly stipend, transportation, food, small perks, etc). It will be a few months before one arrives, unless you get an in-country au pair. So the time horizon may or may not work for your family.

It actually ends up costing quite a bit more than that

We’re in the process of hiring an au pair. I was told $9k up front and $200/week.

What about food, extra utilities, taking her out to eat/carry out when you get it, activities, car insurance if she drives your car, etc?

+1. You won’t know the true cost until you add it up after she leaves. I’m addition to the $9k upfront plus $200/month, I spent around $5k in extra grocery bills (she at A LOT), $1k on her meals when we’d do family take out, $2k on vacations (you pay her airfare, hotel room, and all meals), $1k on gifts for her (birthday, Xmas, threw her a bday party, etc); $1k on car insurance (she caused an accident while on the clock so we paid the $500 deductible and our rate went way up). Etc etc etc. And I’d say our experience was pretty standard!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Short of the Hope diamond, your engagement ring isn't worth selling. You will get a tiny fraction of what you paid for it. I recommend shift work and a complete budget overhaul.

This! Just work. Deliver uber eats if you have to while your kids are at school all day.

[Anonymous]

OP, why don't you get a job at your kids private school. Would solve all your problems. Public school kids can do aftercare at the school.