Less gender identity-focused private school recommendation for a non-religious family

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All this hand wringing for a typical developmental stage in adolescents. Adolescents question almost everything, especially when it comes to their identity. In the past, especially for the generation most parents fall into (those who grew up in the 1970/80s), this kind of questioning was frowned upon, leading many kids to conform to social norms without questioning why these norms exist and whether or not they are built on empirical data or social coercion using normative language and pathologizing those who do not conform. That led to many kids in my generation engaging in self-destructive behavior, including cutting, drug addiction, and suicide. We're now in a phase in our society when our understandings of gender, gender identity, sexuality, etc. have undergone a shift. Attitudes are now more accepting of kids who want to explore their gender. And, guess what? They're discovering that there is more than one way to be a man, one way to be a woman, and even that how they experience their gender does not fit into such a binary framing. As is the case, and as many people have mentioned on this board, most of the noise is coming from the older generation. If your kids are exploring their gender, let them. Maybe they'll end up deciding they're cis gendered; maybe they'll decide their nonbinary; maybe some will decide they just don't care. But, in my opinion, exploring their gender will only lead to them better understanding who they are and why they feel that way.

You are describing the end. The end of our culture, our country, our civilization. When children decide to not have a gender, combined with their older siblings deciding not to have children, then it's the end. Fin.

I think the imminent climate disaster is only a coincidence, but maybe the two endings are correlated somehow.

LOL. "The end of our civilization"?

Could you be any more unnecessarily hysterical?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you scared? Your kid won't become trans if they are not trans just because it is mentioned at school a couple of times a year.

Maybe not but my 6th grader told me that 1/3 of one of his classes was gender non-conforming. This numbers do not translate to the real world.

Exactly. The explosion in kids who identify as trans is a major red flag to me. Two of the biological males in my sons pre-K class (out of 10 boys) were classified as non-binary and would alternate wearing boys and girls clothes. Sincere respect to individuals with gender dysphoria, but I believe this is harming children. Let them be kids instead of confusing them about things they do not understand.

HARMING them?

The only people having trouble with this are the adults. The kids are alright.

The kids are not alright. You haven’t read the thread. I’m glad yours seem to be, but mine and others are experiencing anxiety and worse. Not to mention that the lifelong health risks from hormone therapy/ delaying puberty are beginning to be understood.

The PP was talking about “alternate wearing boys and girls clothes” in PK. Zero harm there.

And very few take puberty blockers - strawman.

I am speaking from personal experience watching my own child and others I know who have experienced extreme anxiety. This is what I have lived through personally and experienced. The PP was making a generalization saying that gender exploration does not negatively impact kids and you are being purposely thick.

Also, there is actual data from actual scientific studies that shows that socially transitioning (eg wearing clothing from the adopted gender, adopting new pronouns, names, etc) does lead children to be much more likely to pursue medical transition. Not a strawman.

I’m curious if you are close to any children who have gone through a period of gender exploration?

There is less harm exploring gender identity than there is to oppress gender identities.

Out of the many, MANY kids and young adults we know who are exploring their gender, very few actually start hormones.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All this hand wringing for a typical developmental stage in adolescents. Adolescents question almost everything, especially when it comes to their identity. In the past, especially for the generation most parents fall into (those who grew up in the 1970/80s), this kind of questioning was frowned upon, leading many kids to conform to social norms without questioning why these norms exist and whether or not they are built on empirical data or social coercion using normative language and pathologizing those who do not conform. That led to many kids in my generation engaging in self-destructive behavior, including cutting, drug addiction, and suicide. We're now in a phase in our society when our understandings of gender, gender identity, sexuality, etc. have undergone a shift. Attitudes are now more accepting of kids who want to explore their gender. And, guess what? They're discovering that there is more than one way to be a man, one way to be a woman, and even that how they experience their gender does not fit into such a binary framing. As is the case, and as many people have mentioned on this board, most of the noise is coming from the older generation. If your kids are exploring their gender, let them. Maybe they'll end up deciding they're cis gendered; maybe they'll decide their nonbinary; maybe some will decide they just don't care. But, in my opinion, exploring their gender will only lead to them better understanding who they are and why they feel that way.

Exactly.

This is literally the opposite of what gender theory says. It teaches them that if they do not conform to the stereotypes, then they aren’t really a boy. Or a girl. This is what led a child I am close with to spiral - feeling that they can’t “be a real girl” if they didn’t like activity x y and x. Some consolation found in being told that it’s ok/ great to be non-binary.

Gender theory is actually quite regressive and reinforces stereotypes.

Schools can and do play a big role in this, especially for kids who are too young for social media.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you scared? Your kid won't become trans if they are not trans just because it is mentioned at school a couple of times a year.

Maybe not but my 6th grader told me that 1/3 of one of his classes was gender non-conforming. This numbers do not translate to the real world.

Exactly. The explosion in kids who identify as trans is a major red flag to me. Two of the biological males in my sons pre-K class (out of 10 boys) were classified as non-binary and would alternate wearing boys and girls clothes. Sincere respect to individuals with gender dysphoria, but I believe this is harming children. Let them be kids instead of confusing them about things they do not understand.

HARMING them?

The only people having trouble with this are the adults. The kids are alright.

The kids are not alright. You haven’t read the thread. I’m glad yours seem to be, but mine and others are experiencing anxiety and worse. Not to mention that the lifelong health risks from hormone therapy/ delaying puberty are beginning to be understood.

The PP was talking about “alternate wearing boys and girls clothes” in PK. Zero harm there.

And very few take puberty blockers - strawman.

I am speaking from personal experience watching my own child and others I know who have experienced extreme anxiety. This is what I have lived through personally and experienced. The PP was making a generalization saying that gender exploration does not negatively impact kids and you are being purposely thick.

Also, there is actual data from actual scientific studies that shows that socially transitioning (eg wearing clothing from the adopted gender, adopting new pronouns, names, etc) does lead children to be much more likely to pursue medical transition. Not a strawman.

I’m curious if you are close to any children who have gone through a period of gender exploration?

There is less harm exploring gender identity than there is to oppress gender identities.

Out of the many, MANY kids and young adults we know who are exploring their gender, very few actually start hormones.

How many of them are in committed long term relationships and have children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:According to the private schools forum, they have a lot more gender-questioning students than MCPS does.

Agreed. My kid is in their second year of private and I’ve been very, very surprised by how “woke” and liberal the school is. I didn’t think that a bunch of rich, highly privileged kids would be so open-minded and accepting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why are you scared? Your kid won't become trans if they are not trans just because it is mentioned at school a couple of times a year.

Maybe not but my 6th grader told me that 1/3 of one of his classes was gender non-conforming. This numbers do not translate to the real world.

Exactly. The explosion in kids who identify as trans is a major red flag to me. Two of the biological males in my sons pre-K class (out of 10 boys) were classified as non-binary and would alternate wearing boys and girls clothes. Sincere respect to individuals with gender dysphoria, but I believe this is harming children. Let them be kids instead of confusing them about things they do not understand.

HARMING them?

The only people having trouble with this are the adults. The kids are alright.

The kids are not alright. You haven’t read the thread. I’m glad yours seem to be, but mine and others are experiencing anxiety and worse. Not to mention that the lifelong health risks from hormone therapy/ delaying puberty are beginning to be understood.

The PP was talking about “alternate wearing boys and girls clothes” in PK. Zero harm there.

And very few take puberty blockers - strawman.

I am speaking from personal experience watching my own child and others I know who have experienced extreme anxiety. This is what I have lived through personally and experienced. The PP was making a generalization saying that gender exploration does not negatively impact kids and you are being purposely thick.

Also, there is actual data from actual scientific studies that shows that socially transitioning (eg wearing clothing from the adopted gender, adopting new pronouns, names, etc) does lead children to be much more likely to pursue medical transition. Not a strawman.

I’m curious if you are close to any children who have gone through a period of gender exploration?

There is less harm exploring gender identity than there is to oppress gender identities.

Out of the many, MANY kids and young adults we know who are exploring their gender, very few actually start hormones.

How many of them are in committed long term relationships and have children?

The oldest 2 - a couple

The rest are <24

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All this hand wringing for a typical developmental stage in adolescents. Adolescents question almost everything, especially when it comes to their identity. In the past, especially for the generation most parents fall into (those who grew up in the 1970/80s), this kind of questioning was frowned upon, leading many kids to conform to social norms without questioning why these norms exist and whether or not they are built on empirical data or social coercion using normative language and pathologizing those who do not conform. That led to many kids in my generation engaging in self-destructive behavior, including cutting, drug addiction, and suicide. We're now in a phase in our society when our understandings of gender, gender identity, sexuality, etc. have undergone a shift. Attitudes are now more accepting of kids who want to explore their gender. And, guess what? They're discovering that there is more than one way to be a man, one way to be a woman, and even that how they experience their gender does not fit into such a binary framing. As is the case, and as many people have mentioned on this board, most of the noise is coming from the older generation. If your kids are exploring their gender, let them. Maybe they'll end up deciding they're cis gendered; maybe they'll decide their nonbinary; maybe some will decide they just don't care. But, in my opinion, exploring their gender will only lead to them better understanding who they are and why they feel that way.

Exactly.

This is literally the opposite of what gender theory says. It teaches them that if they do not conform to the stereotypes, then they aren’t really a boy. Or a girl. This is what led a child I am close with to spiral - feeling that they can’t “be a real girl” if they didn’t like activity x y and x. Some consolation found in being told that it’s ok/ great to be non-binary.

Gender theory is actually quite regressive and reinforces stereotypes.

Schools can and do play a big role in this, especially for kids who are too young for social media.

According to the Official Gender Identity Handbook? No.

Kids are treating gender as much more fluid than historical stereotypes. There is more freedom/flexibility now even for cisgender kids.