Perception of stay-at-home dads

[Anonymous]

^ then again, I am not a SAHM

[Anonymous]

We're two working parents and we don't even bat an eye. H's uncle was a SAHD in the early 80s and never went back to work. I'm European and dads routinely take 1 year paternity leave in my home country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're two working parents and we don't even bat an eye. H's uncle was a SAHD in the early 80s and never went back to work. I'm European and dads routinely take 1 year paternity leave in my home country.

I wish that young men regularly took paternity leave here. It would make job interviews as a young woman a lot easier if everyone was in the same boat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're two working parents and we don't even bat an eye. H's uncle was a SAHD in the early 80s and never went back to work. I'm European and dads routinely take 1 year paternity leave in my home country.

I wish that young men regularly took paternity leave here. It would make job interviews as a young woman a lot easier if everyone was in the same boat.

It's because everyone gets and takes 2 years full paid leave and it doesn't kill your career. I don't know if it's cause and effect, but at least in my home country, men are very involved in child raising and it's generational. My brother changed diapers, took care of the night feeds, cooks for the family. I remember my dad taking me to every weekly ballet practice and then we'd get a hot pretzel on the way home. He also showed me how to garden - he's an amazing gardener. My American H has no recollection of his father ever doing things with him when he was little and had to learn by himself how to be a father. He didn't even knew how to play with a small child, his dad never did.

[Anonymous]

Had a good SAHD friend when my son was younger. I liked him way more than his aggressively assertive “one of the boys” wife. He was super laid back and a good parent. I would have liked him even if he weren’t a SAHD. He, DH, and I got along great. His wife only wanted to talk shop with my DH; back then I worked only a few hours per week from home, and she clearly looked down on SAHM despite being married to a SAHD. I thought he was just fun to hang out with, and we did until our kids went their separate ways. We’d probably still be friends if his DW were more approachable.

[Anonymous]

I would be ecstatic if my DH wanted to do it. We spend a fortune on daycare even at one of the more affordable centers in the area. I would never be happy as a SAHM though

[Anonymous]

I don't think there is as much of a stigma anymore. I have known quite a few.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. So what are the chances a friend of mine who is a stay at home dad will be able to make social connections in the DMV? His wife works a solid gov job bringing in around $130k while he stays home and handles the homefront duties.

He also takes and picks up his two boys from school and is a good partner to his wife, who often travels.

His boys also have some special needs, which require extra attention but nothing major.

Are his boys better off seeing their dad in a job?

No, to the last question. Emphatic no.

Having a SAHP with HHI of 130 in the DMV is going to very financially hard. I would think his kids would benefit more from both parents working and being more financially stable. But that is their choice to decide...which their family would benefit more from, a parent home or more income

We did it just fine.

We're at 155 and it is fine. I mean, we're not hitting the beaches in far-off lands during every break fine but we live a good life, live in highly walkable DC proper, and love it despite some sacrifices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We're two working parents and we don't even bat an eye. H's uncle was a SAHD in the early 80s and never went back to work. I'm European and dads routinely take 1 year paternity leave in my home country.

I wish that young men regularly took paternity leave here. It would make job interviews as a young woman a lot easier if everyone was in the same boat.

It's because everyone gets and takes 2 years full paid leave and it doesn't kill your career. I don't know if it's cause and effect, but at least in my home country, men are very involved in child raising and it's generational. My brother changed diapers, took care of the night feeds, cooks for the family. I remember my dad taking me to every weekly ballet practice and then we'd get a hot pretzel on the way home. He also showed me how to garden - he's an amazing gardener. My American H has no recollection of his father ever doing things with him when he was little and had to learn by himself how to be a father. He didn't even knew how to play with a small child, his dad never did.

Why would a man need to see another man play with a small child to figure that out? That’s a weird gender thing.

[Anonymous]

I know a bunch of them and they seem to be extremely lonely; they talk your ear off at the playground. For some reason they never look exhausted like the moms do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know a bunch of them and they seem to be extremely lonely; they talk your ear off at the playground. For some reason they never look exhausted like the moms do.

Because according to this thread they all have nannies and housecleaners! So much less is expected of them than SAHM’s. I bet their wives still buy all of the kids clothing too.

[Anonymous]

I love stay at home dads. No drama. They don’t turn parenting into a competition . They can and will talk about things other than their children . They are more relaxed. They will volunteer for jobs that are actually helpful like setting up the chairs for the school concert or building the set. Love ‘em but I’ve always been a guys girl.

[Anonymous]

Couple we knew decided he would become a SAHD.

Then she stopped sleeping with him for 8 months because she was ****ing one of her co-workers. He finally got her to confess. She blamed it on her new lack of respect for him. He divorced her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Couple we knew decided he would become a SAHD.

Then she stopped sleeping with him for 8 months because she was ****ing one of her co-workers. He finally got her to confess. She blamed it on her new lack of respect for him. He divorced her.

Not surprising at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Couple we knew decided he would become a SAHD.

Then she stopped sleeping with him for 8 months because she was ****ing one of her co-workers. He finally got her to confess. She blamed it on her new lack of respect for him. He divorced her.

Not surprising at all.

Cheaters cheat because they are selfish liars. Period. They always have some sort of excuse but the real reason is internal.