At a loss with classroom behavior issues

[Anonymous]

I feel like all I'm doing is complaining about my kid's elementary school, but lately everything that has bothered me at varying times is all happening at once. The most recent issue: a kid with severe behavior issues--kicking, screaming, throwing things--has been moved into my child's classroom from another teacher/classroom at the school. Last year, my child went through the entire year with another child with behavior issues almost exactly like this--they evacuated the classroom several times a week b/c of this, sometimes twice a day. Now it's happening again. Screaming; tantrums; evaculation. And this year, there is already also another child with behavior challenges that consumes the teacher's time (this kid doesn't have tantrums though--he's just extremely demanding of her time because he has chronic inattention and is disruptive--so there's never an evaculation based on his behavior). Do we just have to deal with this until June? Can I get my kid moved to another classroom? Kid is miserable and I'm at a loss.

[Anonymous]

My sister is a teacher who has a disruptive child in her class. She told me the only way the child will get placement in a school equipped to handle him is if the parents complain (in writing) to admin. His parents are against any transfer or even psychiatric care. She has been assaulted by this child and has no quick recourse. If parents complain or express concern for children's safety that would help speed up an otherwise slow process. I imagine it would be the same at your kid's school.

[Anonymous]

I am a teacher.

You must be a loud and squeaky wheel. At every opportunity. Be polite and be respectful but advocate for your child. (Your child feels threatened and intimidated. Your child feels unsafe. Your child is scared that she or he will be hurt by this classmate or by someone else during the disruption. Your child is scared for your teacher. Your child is upset that his/her teacher isn't able to handle the disruption. Your child doesn't want to go to school because of the new classmate. Your child is not learning new material at the same pace as before the new classmate's arrival.) The school's response may be to move your child or the school's response may be to move the other child. Either way your child will benefit.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Another teacher here. I agree that the best thing you can do is share your concerns with the administrators. Often they'll keep placing kids in inappropriate settings either because the parents of that child don't want their child to receive the support they *need* or because they're penny-pinching. The rest of the parents outnumber the one. Be very clear that you have concerns about your child's safety and ability to learn with the new addition in the room. Considering the fact that your child already experienced evacuations last year, you know this school isn't going to do anything until you are loud and clear. Make them squirm, let them know that if any harm comes to your child you'll sue them. Tell them that you are documenting your child's reports. This school isn't doing the right thing for anyone.

[Anonymous]

You can always pay for private. For those kids to get in a better placement, parents often have to sue the school system as many of the private special need schools will not take private pay kids. Most parents cannot afford to sue the school system.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP. I am a teacher and I want to echo what other posters have said. I also want to suggest that you reach out to school board members and or ask to speak at a board meeting if you don't get some kind of results. Generally, when you publicly (orally and in writing) indicate the you or your child feels unsafe, action will occur.
I have had a number of students like the two you describe and had to both go to therapy and take medication because of the stress I was under. I also had to fight hard and push for a more appropriate placement for the child (this year) who was not successful in a gen ed room despite a BIP, a supportive staff, extensive work and a principal who was amazingly supportive. I am also working with my union to ensure that students who need more support get it AND staff and other students are provided with a safe workplace. Both are possible. I wish you the best of luck.

[Anonymous]

I was instructed to not leave specific notes about student X in my sub plans because his parents believe he is being targeted by staff. So I had to make a generic note to watch students near the door. The last time I was out, student x intentionally shut a classmate’s hand in the door —something he has attempted with other kids before. Now the injured kid’s parents are irate that the sub let it happen.

[Anonymous]

I'm in a similar situation, both in my classroom and in my child's. It's terrible how bad things have gotten. I am ready to homeschool and quit teaching. As others have said you can document, document, document. Send a daily email to the principal with the events as reported to you, cc the school counselor, superintendent, school board if you feel inclined

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you so much to everyone who replied, including and especially the teachers. I am so sorry to hear that you have struggled with this yourselves. I adore my child’s teacher—and I did last year, too—and I am so upset for her that she is now feeling and dealing with this stress. I am afraid to bring this up to her too Ok in because I know there is an limit to what she can do, and I hate to add to her burden. But I know ultimately it helps her if we are in communication with the admins (this is what the teacher last year advised, too). To the teacher who brought up subs: yes, I have fear about this. I know the teacher is taking a few days off in a couple of weeks, and I am worried about what will happen. Last year, the subs had a hard time. One actually told my child “not to tattle” when he saw the disruptive child push his friend into a desk. I wish there were more specific help and attention given to these kids: so know it must feel so scary for them, too, to be so out of control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was instructed to not leave specific notes about student X in my sub plans because his parents believe he is being targeted by staff. So I had to make a generic note to watch students near the door. The last time I was out, student x intentionally shut a classmate’s hand in the door —something he has attempted with other kids before. Now the injured kid’s parents are irate that the sub let it happen.

Here is the crux of the issue. The sub didn’t “let” anything happen. The child purposely shut the door on someone’s else’s hand. Blame is misplaced in schools these days.

[Anonymous]

My child's school has a similar child in another class, and two parents have complained enough that their children have been moved out of the class, so I would follow the teachers' advice and be a loud, squeaky, annoying as hell wheel.

[Anonymous]

Another teacher here. I can tell you when parents start calling meeting with admin and making it clear a kid in class is having huge impact, that’s when they address it. Make clear the teacher is doing what they can but your son is still impacted negatively. I have seen this myself; we as teachers can’t do anything about their placement even if we say it’s impacting the other kids but when you get 3-4 parents getting loud about it, it moves the needle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can always pay for private. For those kids to get in a better placement, parents often have to sue the school system as many of the private special need schools will not take private pay kids. Most parents cannot afford to sue the school system.

I think the point being made by previous posters is that whether it is parents or school district resisting placement with higher level of services, pressure from parents of other students can move the scale.

Specifically,

IDEA requires the IEP team to address “behavior that impedes his or her learning or that of
others”

P.L. 108-446 §614 (b)(2)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was instructed to not leave specific notes about student X in my sub plans because his parents believe he is being targeted by staff. So I had to make a generic note to watch students near the door. The last time I was out, student x intentionally shut a classmate’s hand in the door —something he has attempted with other kids before. Now the injured kid’s parents are irate that the sub let it happen.

Here is the crux of the issue. The sub didn’t “let” anything happen. The child purposely shut the door on someone’s else’s hand. Blame is misplaced in schools these days.

So, I have to ask--how is that kid's IEP formulated to address this behavior, given that you know it has been attempted with other kids? And would that IEP, as written, have imposed any requirements on whoever was working in the classroom that day as the classroom teacher? And if so, how were those requirements communicated or otherwise addressed re: having a sub?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another teacher here. I can tell you when parents start calling meeting with admin and making it clear a kid in class is having huge impact, that’s when they address it. Make clear the teacher is doing what they can but your son is still impacted negatively. I have seen this myself; we as teachers can’t do anything about their placement even if we say it’s impacting the other kids but when you get 3-4 parents getting loud about it, it moves the needle.

OP here. This is possibly what got this child moved into a new classroom—parents in his original classroom going to admin. Did not consider that before. So what do they do: just move kids with extreme behavior disruptions from classroom to classroom as infinitum? Why doesn’t a child who needs this much help regulating impulses and emotions have an aide? This must be such drain on teachers and also no real help to the child.