Sibling refuses to send item from family home WWYD?

[Anonymous]

When my mother died, long after my father and with a house full of things our large family descended on the empty home and took what they wanted.

One Brother took the art. One brother declined anything. One brother took a table. Sister hired a truck and paid the driver by telling him to take whatever he wanted. He took my fathers antique desk. When all that was left was junk a service hauled it away and the house was sold.

I was out of the country while this went on and asked my sister to rescue a small statue and keep it for me. It’s all I have from my former family home. But it’s been 3 years and she keeps making excuses why she can’t put this small item in a box and send to me. Advice?

[Anonymous]

It's possible she didn't keep it.

[Anonymous]

You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's possible she didn't keep it.

This would be my guess too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's possible she didn't keep it.

This would be my guess. Unless the statue is worth lots of $$$$. You were out of the country and not there to help deal with everything. It is the downside of being far away. Be happy your siblings dealt with everything. Forget about the statue.

[Anonymous]

You never visit her?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Heartless. There but by the grace of God go you...

[Anonymous]

Go visit her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

[Anonymous]

You never went home when your mother died or in the three years since? You don’t sound that attached.

[Anonymous]

She doesn’t have it.

And wow, your family sounds a little rough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous[b wrote:]You think because you chose to be far away from family,[/b] including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

You don't know that OP chose to live overseas. Maybe OP or OP's spouse is active duty military and was stationed at an overseas base. They don't get a "choice" in that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

This again? Another "I had a worse situation, so how dare you complain?!?!" post?

Whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]You think because you chose to be far away from family,[/b] including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

You don't know that OP chose to live overseas. Maybe OP or OP's spouse is active duty military and was stationed at an overseas base. They don't get a "choice" in that.

Okay, then the siblings who stayed behind didn’t have a choice in handling all the caretaking and paperwork and cleaning of the house. Adding more on their plate is just as obnoxious as calling out OP for never visiting in 3 years. (Last time I checked even active duty military get vacation days...)