Sibling refuses to send item from family home WWYD?

[Anonymous]

It’s probably her favorite statue now. Let it go for now and someday it may find its way to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s probably her favorite statue now. Let it go for now and someday it may find its way to you.

PP here. This is what I was thinking. Spiteful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry about this OP. I think something similar will happen to me knowing my own family dynamic. If I were you, I'd let it all go. And then buy a new statue that reminds me of my mother to grace my home in her honor. It's the memory you want to preserve, not the statue. Good luck and happy holidays!

+1

Excellent idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

It was just a matter of terrible timing for us. We had recently uprooted ourselves and moved long distance to a new location ourselves. I couldn't just drop everything and leave right then. Luckily my parent was able to handle a lot of the logistics of paring down and my siblings were able to assist. When I look back, I do not regret my decision to stay put because it was absolutely the right decision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

It was just a matter of terrible timing for us. We had recently uprooted ourselves and moved long distance to a new location ourselves. I couldn't just drop everything and leave right then. Luckily my parent was able to handle a lot of the logistics of paring down and my siblings were able to assist. When I look back, I do not regret my decision to stay put because it was absolutely the right decision.

Ugh, these are all SUCH super lame excuses, you should be embarrassed (did you actually say you would have hired an estate salesperson??). This is something you definitely should look back on and regret it, but whatever you've got to tell yourself to help you sleep through the night.

You sound super self centered as if your nuclear family is all that matters... your family (of origin, of course!) most definitely felt it too.

You'll see what happens when your kids do the same exact thing to you one day. They saw how you didn't make your parents a priority in their time of need and your time will come too, they're going to emulate your behavior right back at you.

I wonder if you'll regret it then?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

HA! Not all spouses are like this - wouldn't it be nice if all spouses were like this?? Listen, you don't know what is going on in anyone else's house, so don't pretend to know. It literally could be anything. In some houses, if the wife isn't there, everything falls apart. If your DH helps out, shut up and be grateful, and stop judging other people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

It was just a matter of terrible timing for us. We had recently uprooted ourselves and moved long distance to a new location ourselves. I couldn't just drop everything and leave right then. Luckily my parent was able to handle a lot of the logistics of paring down and my siblings were able to assist. When I look back, I do not regret my decision to stay put because it was absolutely the right decision.

Ugh, these are all SUCH super lame excuses, you should be embarrassed (did you actually say you would have hired an estate salesperson??). This is something you definitely should look back on and regret it, but whatever you've got to tell yourself to help you sleep through the night.

You sound super self centered as if your nuclear family is all that matters... your family (of origin, of course!) most definitely felt it too.

You'll see what happens when your kids do the same exact thing to you one day. They saw how you didn't make your parents a priority in their time of need and your time will come too, they're going to emulate your behavior right back at you.

I wonder if you'll regret it then?

Just shut up. Seriously. You’re not right and you’re being an ass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

It was just a matter of terrible timing for us. We had recently uprooted ourselves and moved long distance to a new location ourselves. I couldn't just drop everything and leave right then. Luckily my parent was able to handle a lot of the logistics of paring down and my siblings were able to assist. When I look back, I do not regret my decision to stay put because it was absolutely the right decision.

Ugh, these are all SUCH super lame excuses, you should be embarrassed (did you actually say you would have hired an estate salesperson??). This is something you definitely should look back on and regret it, but whatever you've got to tell yourself to help you sleep through the night.

You sound super self centered as if your nuclear family is all that matters... your family (of origin, of course!) most definitely felt it too.

You'll see what happens when your kids do the same exact thing to you one day. They saw how you didn't make your parents a priority in their time of need and your time will come too, they're going to emulate your behavior right back at you.

I wonder if you'll regret it then?

I wonder when you will regret being so judgmental, and what I would give when (not if, but when) it happens. You don't know PP, so back off. You seem like a worse person than someone taking care of their kids, that's for sure. Not all families are the same. Get over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

It was just a matter of terrible timing for us. We had recently uprooted ourselves and moved long distance to a new location ourselves. I couldn't just drop everything and leave right then. Luckily my parent was able to handle a lot of the logistics of paring down and my siblings were able to assist. When I look back, I do not regret my decision to stay put because it was absolutely the right decision.

Ugh, these are all SUCH super lame excuses, you should be embarrassed (did you actually say you would have hired an estate salesperson??). This is something you definitely should look back on and regret it, but whatever you've got to tell yourself to help you sleep through the night.

You sound super self centered as if your nuclear family is all that matters... your family (of origin, of course!) most definitely felt it too.

You'll see what happens when your kids do the same exact thing to you one day. They saw how you didn't make your parents a priority in their time of need and your time will come too, they're going to emulate your behavior right back at you.

I wonder if you'll regret it then?

Just shut up. Seriously. You’re not right and you’re being an ass.

+1

The can't stop til I make my point of trying to make PP feel bad for no reason DCUM poster. A classic. Be glad you are not her.

[Anonymous]

Looks like the selfish sister found the thread!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Ugh, these are all SUCH super lame excuses, you should be embarrassed (did you actually say you would have hired an estate salesperson??). This is something you definitely should look back on and regret it, but whatever you've got to tell yourself to help you sleep through the night.

You sound super self centered as if your nuclear family is all that matters... your family (of origin, of course!) most definitely felt it too.

You'll see what happens when your kids do the same exact thing to you one day. They saw how you didn't make your parents a priority in their time of need and your time will come too, they're going to emulate your behavior right back at you.

I wonder if you'll regret it then?

Please stay on your meds. If you are not taking meds, it is time for to see a psychiatrist. Seek help.

No sane person would attack another person they do not know, the way you are doing.

[Anonymous]

Put the box addressed to you and prepaid inside another box to your sister. Have all the cushioning, wrapping etc. ready to go.

If she refuses to put it in the empty, self addressed, paid box and send it back to you, you have your answer. Either she got rid of it or she's keeping it for herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Ugh, these are all SUCH super lame excuses, you should be embarrassed (did you actually say you would have hired an estate salesperson??). This is something you definitely should look back on and regret it, but whatever you've got to tell yourself to help you sleep through the night.

You sound super self centered as if your nuclear family is all that matters... your family (of origin, of course!) most definitely felt it too.

You'll see what happens when your kids do the same exact thing to you one day. They saw how you didn't make your parents a priority in their time of need and your time will come too, they're going to emulate your behavior right back at you.

I wonder if you'll regret it then?

Please stay on your meds. If you are not taking meds, it is time for to see a psychiatrist. Seek help.

No sane person would attack another person they do not know, the way you are doing.

That was harsh. Other PP here. But I agree that first PP here is totally out of line, and quite possibly the greedy sister. It is obvious that there is an addendum here, if not just ruffling OP's feathers. If nothing else, get a hobby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You think because you chose to be far away from family, including you aging mother, that everyone should bend over backwards to get you what you want? You didn't care enough to help your siblings with the house, but you care this much about one statue? I think you're too late for any advice here. You should have done better before.

Wow you are really mean PP. (Not OP BTW.) I'm so sick of how mean people are. OP said it's the ONLY THING she had of her childhood home. People like you suck PP.

People like this OP are the ones who suck. As a daughter who just very recently cleaned out her 90-year-old father's home to move him into assisted living, then two days later got a blood-curdling call from him that my brother just dropped dead in front of him, reading posts like OP's disgusts me. How dare she complain, three years after her mother's death, after having done nothing to help her siblings, that her sister won't mail her something. Please.

What does that have to do with anything? You have no idea why OP wasn't around when her parents passed away.

Some people are kind and loving throughout their lives, even in difficult circumstsances, and some -- aren't. You cleared out your father's home. Does that mean your siblings don't have any love for him, or that your father doesn't have any love for THEM? They still are his children and their emotional claims to childhood items is just as valid as yours. Again, you are mean, PP. Nothing more than that.

Actually, my siblings were there as well (right before the one died unexpectedly at the age of 50 of course). Because it was important to us all. It wasn't important enough to OP to be there. Even if she has legitimate reasons, it's not right to put the burden on siblings then bug them about an object. I'm not a mean person, but I know how to prioritize and have no patience for the entitled.

Huh? I was in Op's shoes and couldn't be there when it was time to clear out the house. I had kids in school on two different schedules in two different school systems. It was sort of crazy and I had to prioritize being their for my kids. Maybe Op had similar considerations or a sick spouse or whatever. Honestly, I was just grateful that my siblings had more flexibility to help out because if it had all fallen on my plate, I would have had to hand it over to an estate salesperson. There was simply no way for me to be two places at one time.

Where was your spouse or the other parent of your children? I get that life is crazy, kids need taking care of and all, but I worry that we're losing our will as a society to do things that just flat out need to get done - there are responsibilities as humans and as children of the parents who took care of us that we just need to make happen. And putting the burden of cleaning out our parents' house on siblings because we are "too busy" just sounds like we aren't keeping our priorities straight. I really think your husband (or wife if I have my genders wrong) should have said, "Of course you should go help out your family during this difficult time. I've got the kids and don't worry about a thing."

It was just a matter of terrible timing for us. We had recently uprooted ourselves and moved long distance to a new location ourselves. I couldn't just drop everything and leave right then. Luckily my parent was able to handle a lot of the logistics of paring down and my siblings were able to assist. When I look back, I do not regret my decision to stay put because it was absolutely the right decision.

Ugh, these are all SUCH super lame excuses, you should be embarrassed (did you actually say you would have hired an estate salesperson??). This is something you definitely should look back on and regret it, but whatever you've got to tell yourself to help you sleep through the night.

You sound super self centered as if your nuclear family is all that matters... your family (of origin, of course!) most definitely felt it too.

You'll see what happens when your kids do the same exact thing to you one day. They saw how you didn't make your parents a priority in their time of need and your time will come too, they're going to emulate your behavior right back at you.

I wonder if you'll regret it then?

You are the type who swoops in BEFORE a parent even dies and starts walking off with tools, jewelry, t.v.s and computers. And then you portray yourself as the martyr who did it all. Amirite?

I can be rude right back at you. Be nice.