DC parents leave kids in car for wine tasting

[Anonymous]

22:36 makes a really interesting point on how the kids will fare now - considering these parents probably don't want to be seen out so much... And might be stuck at home with 2 toddlers...

Hope all goes well for the children.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they'll move to France to get a new start.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not suggesting that they're good parents or that they care about their kids -- jury is out on that one -- but I think they likely care mightily about their reputations esp. at work. For that reason, I doubt they'll do something like this again. They're still awaiting a hearing so who knows what the punishment will be for this incident. But the humiliation of this will follow them around for a while -- as people talk behind their backs, there's a 50+ pg thread on them on DCUM, and every friend and acquaintance from coworkers to parents who don't even know them but see them at preschool will be looking at them extra hard when they're out with their kids to see how they treat them, how their kids interact with them etc. Plus I bet each of them has 3-4 people in their lives (not just family -- but people are work etc) who are blunt -- blunt enough that they have asked or will put them on the spot eventually and ask "so how did this happen. Why did you and DH/DW think this was ok?" All of this "attention" will keep them from doing this kind of thing again, though for the kids' sake I hope they aren't abusers because then they'll just make the kids' lives rough at home outside the public eye. I mean the kids are 2-3, not a lot of impulse control at that age even with the best behaved kids; I hope for the kids' sake that the parents don't hit etc. bc now that they'll avoid the public for a while [b]-- there will be a LOT of time at home esp on weekends when the kids will work their last nerve over normal childlike things and they'll have to deal.

Why should they? They'll just hire a sitter and go out to eat.. not that anyone knows what they look like to be 'avoiding the public' because of the scandal.

The worst repercussion of this story for them is not people talking behind their back, it's this story being picked up by major media all over the place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I knew they'd get the kids back before the next hearing; maybe they didn't have them for a day or 2 as CPS checked out the house and talked to them about parenting. The DC foster care system has bigger fish to fry than 2 wealthy, nerdy parents with means who decided that for once they didn't want to be nerds sitting at home on Saturday and would instead hit up a wine tasting, kids be damned. I bet CPS transferred the kids back and said "next time please get a sitter so we don't have to go through the drama when there are kids being beaten and going hungry who need our attention, thanks."

And be grateful the kids didn't spend 2.5-3 hours in the car...and the one with bare feet didn't lose a toe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not suggesting that they're good parents or that they care about their kids -- jury is out on that one -- but I think they likely care mightily about their reputations esp. at work. For that reason, I doubt they'll do something like this again. They're still awaiting a hearing so who knows what the punishment will be for this incident. But the humiliation of this will follow them around for a while -- as people talk behind their backs, there's a 50+ pg thread on them on DCUM, and every friend and acquaintance from coworkers to parents who don't even know them but see them at preschool will be looking at them extra hard when they're out with their kids to see how they treat them, how their kids interact with them etc. Plus I bet each of them has 3-4 people in their lives (not just family -- but people are work etc) who are blunt -- blunt enough that they have asked or will put them on the spot eventually and ask "so how did this happen. Why did you and DH/DW think this was ok?" All of this "attention" will keep them from doing this kind of thing again, though for the kids' sake I hope they aren't abusers because then they'll just make the kids' lives rough at home outside the public eye. I mean the kids are 2-3, not a lot of impulse control at that age even with the best behaved kids; I hope for the kids' sake that the parents don't hit etc. bc now that they'll avoid the public for a while [b]-- there will be a LOT of time at home esp on weekends when the kids will work their last nerve over normal childlike things and they'll have to deal.

Why should they? They'll just hire a sitter and go out to eat.. not that anyone knows what they look like to be 'avoiding the public' because of the scandal.

The worst repercussion of this story for them is not people talking behind their back, it's this story being picked up by major media all over the place.

Of course they CAN hire a sitter -- hell they could have hired one that day too. It's a possibility that they won't do that in order to "spend time" with their kids -- to show the judge what good parents they are. It's for the best for everyone if they hire weekend sitters; they can either go out by themselves to adult events or even if they have nothing planned, send the kids out to the playground or playdates or whatever -- I just have this feeling that they may not be super patient or tolerant of their kids; I don't know what I feel that way, but if it's at all true -- I think they have the means and should not worry about what people will think (I mean - they couldn't think any worse of the couple) -- they should be getting sitters left and right to relieve the "burden."

[Anonymous]

What does STBX mean from earlier post? Any ideas?

[Anonymous]

Soon to be ex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:here's another wrinkle-
my stbx grew up in a house where the parents partied (hey - it was the good old days, right?) and regularly left the kids do their own devices, and I'm talking toddlers and babies. MIL was a functioning alcoholic and FIL totally enabled her. STBX grew up in a highly unstable (but upper SES, educated) household and he never had any real stability. The stories he used to tell me were bat-shit crazy. But he thought it was all fine. Pretty funny in fact. He did have a nanny during the week, but not in the evenings or on the weekends. Anyhoo, as an adult he's a hot mess, has BPD, can't hold a job, maintain relationships, never takes personal responsibility for his choices, etc etc.

Not saying that one incident is going to scar your kid for life, but if this is their parenting style, then there are real ramifications for the kids. No joke.

Interesting. Back in the the sixties my grandparents left heir four year old in his crib while they went next door to the neighbors house for a party. The house was robbed. Not only did the police not give a damn that a four year old was alone in the house, they interviewed him as a witness!

He's fine today.

Presumably one incident? Worlds apart from growing up in a house where you don't feel safe. I'm willing to bet that this is not the first time these parents did this. It sounds like that was there MO, and this time they got caught. And yeah, a 4 year old in a crib? How did he not climb out? Maybe a playpen with a locked lid. And if this was how your parent was raised, then I bet he's got some issues. You sound a lot like STBX - like it's a funny anecdote, no biggie. Ha ha.

[Anonymous]

I wonder if they're reading this thread.

[Anonymous]

lock em up, throw away the key, and let tyrone tear their asses up in Cell Block D.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe they'll move to France to get a new start.

Ha - what year is it - 1975?

In terms of "public consequences" for them and their children, it seems to me what people at their current daycare think is the least of their worries... For the rest of their lives anybody who googles them will get any of several hundred newspaper articles from pretty much every single country in the world about the "wine tasting and abandoned babies".

And decades from now when the kids are grown, they will still get the story about how they were screaming in the cold car without shoes and hats whenever they put the names of their parents in the search engine.
And their children... And children's grandchildren...

Oh, the Internet...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Different poster here, also saw her this week and they have the kids (don't want to say the context to out myself.) she looked like shit and seemed pretty shaken up by it. Daughter seemed clingier than usual but otherwise fine.

Guessing they have some good lawyers.

Good. I'm a poster that thought kids shouldn't bee separated with parents over this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Different poster here, also saw her this week and they have the kids (don't want to say the context to out myself.) she looked like shit and seemed pretty shaken up by it. Daughter seemed clingier than usual but otherwise fine.

Guessing they have some good lawyers.

Good. I'm a poster that thought kids shouldn't bee separated with parents over this.

Doubt you'd feel this way if they were poor, or black!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Different poster here, also saw her this week and they have the kids (don't want to say the context to out myself.) she looked like shit and seemed pretty shaken up by it. Daughter seemed clingier than usual but otherwise fine.

Guessing they have some good lawyers.

Good. I'm a poster that thought kids shouldn't bee separated with parents over this.

Doubt you'd feel this way if they were poor, or black!

Why do people keep saying this? NP here who is also glad the children are not in foster care, and no, I would not feel differently if the family were poor or black. I don't think children should be removed uless there is an immediate danger to their safety. I don't think that is the case here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Different poster here, also saw her this week and they have the kids (don't want to say the context to out myself.) she looked like shit and seemed pretty shaken up by it. Daughter seemed clingier than usual but otherwise fine.

Guessing they have some good lawyers.

Good. I'm a poster that thought kids shouldn't bee separated with parents over this.

Doubt you'd feel this way if they were poor, or black!

but do poor people wine taste at all?