Another question about splitting bills during family vacation
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Anonymous
| This is somewhat similar to the thread about splitting the cost of food, but I need a reality check here. We are taking a beach vacation with my sister and her family (3 kids, ages 5, 8, 11). We are renting a house that has more bedrooms than we actually need, and have agreed to split that down the middle. Any meal eaten out we will get separate checks. The question is about other groceries during the week. DH and I have an infant who will be breastfeeding. Sister suggested we just take one massive trip to Costco and split the food bill 50/50 - but she's got 5 eaters in her family and we've got two. Is that fair? Or is it not even worth it to point out that her boys eat a ton and 2 vs 5 isn't exactly down the middle. Be honest, I can take it! |
Anonymous
No, not fair. How about you buy just what you and your DH are going to eat or will it all be family style eating? Or, she can separately ring up what her kids will eat and you split what the adults will eat 50/50. |
Anonymous
Hmm this is a tough one. I guess it depends on what you're buying at Costco. If its a lot of adult stuff like alcohol then I would just split it. If its a lot of kid stuff I might casually suggest splitting the household items on a different bill than the kid food. Or just throw in a really expensive item you know your sister doesn't like to make up for it 
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Anonymous
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In my family, I wouldn't sweat this at all. Mainly because I know it would all shake out ok. And I know that none of my siblings are trying to take advantage of me and get something for free.
So. Is your sister the type that would do the whole "take something for free" angle? Or is she generally generous etc? But I can't imagine that the difference is that great I'd want to speak up. Maybe $100? Not worth drama to me and I'd see it as a small gift to my nieces/nephews. |
Anonymous
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I feel like all of these bill splitting posts about vacations are a little cheap.
Just split the grocery bill and make sure you also pick stuff you and hubby like to eat (even if it's not kid friendly). If you guys go out and buy separate groceries what are you going to do, have assigned shelves in the fridge/cabinets? |
Anonymous
| This is just too nitpicky. How much of a difference do you think it will make, really? If it's a huge difference, maybe bring it up, but if not, really, let it go. |
Anonymous
| I’d split it because over the course of life things have a way of coming out even. It wouldn’t be worth it to me to do it any other way. One caveat. It wouldn’t be a financial hardship for us and our families don’t bean count and are pretty generous with hosting. |
Anonymous
| In my family kids count for .5 so in your case you’d have 5.5 people. Divide total cost by 5.5 and they pay per person cost for 3.5 people and you pay for 2. |
Anonymous
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Nope not fair but if the Costco bill is $200 and you are only eating $50 of it then you are only gifting her $50.
It might be a good idea to come up with a mutually agreed upon grocery list before you go. If your sister is the type on insist on particular things you may end paying $100 for things you will never eat. Some things like coffee, creamer, olive oil, any spices, brownie mix etc you should get a grocery store as you'll never go through that much in a week. Here is a list of what I'd buy for my kids in that age range. Are these foods that you are your DH eat? Milk Orange Juice Pancake mix Bread Turkey or ham for sandwiches Cereal Salad or lettuce Tomatoes Cheddar Cheese Eggs Carrot sticks Apples Goldfish Hamburger Hamburger buns Marina sauce Pasta Muffins or croissants |
Anonymous
why on earth would a breast fed infant count as .5? I don’t think an I can’t should count until they’re eating enough to be noticeable...at least 2 for most kids. |
Anonymous
| Our family spends a week at OBX every year -- 3 families with varying numbers of kids. We tally all food expenditures (receipts in a jar) and divide by the number of people in each family, "charging" kids 50% of an adult's share for kids who eat grown up food. At about age 12 or 13, they're charged as an adult (since the boys eat more than 3 adults combined). |
Anonymous
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What about the fact they need a bigger house because the sister has the bigger family and Op isn’t fussing over this?
To be clear, in my family this would be a non-issue. What’s mine is theirs and I’d never nitpick a grocery bill. But OP is already conceding on the house thing and that should be pointed out. |
Anonymous
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Yeah I get it that it is not really 50/50, but it also doesn't make sense to shop separately for stuff like cereal, milk, etc. Too much duplication of stuff. I also don't really think splitting 2/7 and 5/7 is really right either since adults eat a lot more than kids. It also depends on who is a bigger eater, etc.
In the end, I think this is not a hill I would want to die on. Just view it as a cost of not having identical sized families but enjoying time together. It would be nice is she acknowledged the disparity and chipped in a little more, but compared to the house rental extra room cost, a trip to Costco is nothing. |
Anonymous
This is the approach I’d take too. Make sure you go or you will get stuck with kids junk food. |
Anonymous
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OP - if you can afford to suck it up, do so.
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