Another question about splitting bills during family vacation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my family, I wouldn't sweat this at all. Mainly because I know it would all shake out ok. And I know that none of my siblings are trying to take advantage of me and get something for free.

So. Is your sister the type that would do the whole "take something for free" angle? Or is she generally generous etc?

But I can't imagine that the difference is that great I'd want to speak up. Maybe $100? Not worth drama to me and I'd see it as a small gift to my nieces/nephews.

Yeah really, this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is somewhat similar to the thread about splitting the cost of food, but I need a reality check here. We are taking a beach vacation with my sister and her family (3 kids, ages 5, 8, 11). We are renting a house that has more bedrooms than we actually need, and have agreed to split that down the middle. Any meal eaten out we will get separate checks. The question is about other groceries during the week. DH and I have an infant who will be breastfeeding. Sister suggested we just take one massive trip to Costco and split the food bill 50/50 - but she's got 5 eaters in her family and we've got two. Is that fair? Or is it not even worth it to point out that her boys eat a ton and 2 vs 5 isn't exactly down the middle. Be honest, I can take it!

No, not fair. How about you buy just what you and your DH are going to eat or will it all be family style eating? Or, she can separately ring up what her kids will eat and you split what the adults will eat 50/50.

Honestly, this seems bananas with family. Don't you do holidays where one family member hosts and ends up buying food for all the others? And then vice versa? Unless someone is really penny pinching, this seems so baroque and unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

OP, that would bug me, if I'm being honest. If you think you can let it go, let it go. As PPs said, if it's less than $100, then just chalk it up to things swinging your sister's way this time. But if this is a pattern and/or it will needle you, then casually say "Hey, what about counting kids as .5 and doing it that way?"

[Anonymous]

I could not imagine splitting hairs over this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my family kids count for .5 so in your case you’d have 5.5 people. Divide total cost by 5.5 and they pay per person cost for 3.5 people and you pay for 2.

why on earth would a breast fed infant count as .5? I don’t think an I can’t should count until they’re eating enough to be noticeable...at least 2 for most kids.

The PP didn't count the infant. 2+2+(3x.5)=5.5

[Anonymous]

Some people are not meant to vacation with other people.

[Anonymous]

When we vacation with my family, each family unit contributes 100.00 per family member. I have 5 in my family - 2 adults and 1 kid, so I put in 500.00. my brother and his wife put in 200.00. We pay for groceries out of that money, and it feels fair. I would be super annoyed if I was in a family of 2 + infant and had to split groceries evenly with a family of 5. I have 3 kids and know how much they can eat!!!

[Anonymous]

PP - sorry -* I have 5 in my family - 2 adults and 3 kids!

[Anonymous]

Honestly I find these threads so bizarre- what could this possibly cost you. OP? An extra $50-$75? It’s family..

That said: DH has two siblings without kids. In this situation we would just offer to buy the groceries and tell them to throw in whatever...otherwise they’d pay for something like a casual lunch out (like quick service food) and call it a day...often, they might offer to go to the liquor store and get stuff for fun drinks, or pick up some good wine.

This stuff eventually evens out...

Sounds like your sister just isn’t thinking or maybe she is a bit of a cheapskate...in either case I’d just suck it up given the small $amt

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my family kids count for .5 so in your case you’d have 5.5 people. Divide total cost by 5.5 and they pay per person cost for 3.5 people and you pay for 2.

Agree.

If you’re cutting a cheque do it fairly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is somewhat similar to the thread about splitting the cost of food, but I need a reality check here. We are taking a beach vacation with my sister and her family (3 kids, ages 5, 8, 11). We are renting a house that has more bedrooms than we actually need, and have agreed to split that down the middle. Any meal eaten out we will get separate checks. The question is about other groceries during the week. DH and I have an infant who will be breastfeeding. Sister suggested we just take one massive trip to Costco and split the food bill 50/50 - but she's got 5 eaters in her family and we've got two. Is that fair? Or is it not even worth it to point out that her boys eat a ton and 2 vs 5 isn't exactly down the middle. Be honest, I can take it!

Listen, if you are going to be counting who is eating what, family combo vacations are not for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When we vacation with my family, each family unit contributes 100.00 per family member. I have 5 in my family - 2 adults and 1 kid, so I put in 500.00. my brother and his wife put in 200.00. We pay for groceries out of that money, and it feels fair. I would be super annoyed if I was in a family of 2 + infant and had to split groceries evenly with a family of 5. I have 3 kids and know how much they can eat!!!

$500??? For a week? I spend $150/week max. Why so high??

[Anonymous]

OP here - thanks for all the insight!! One PP did mention that we aren't splitting hairs over the house - it has 5 bedrooms, 1 of which will be taken up by our small family and the other 4 go to hers.

We don't have a large income, we currently live in a one bedroom apt, so $200 extra for a week of food we aren't going to eat is not something we would normally budget for, but family is family and we all get along so it is what it is. The gist I'm getting is that splitting the food 50/50 is unfair, but I'm also taking the advice of most of you that I'm not going to sweat it.

Thanks for your honest responses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - if you can afford to suck it up, do so.

+1 If they're decent guests (and people), they'll contribute where they can. Presenting them with bills before they even arrive is bizarre. If financially it's too much, then have one outing sans kids instead of two.

[Anonymous]

Add a case of diapers and one of wipes while you're at Costcto ("for the beach"), and that will pretty much even things out.