DH simply doesn’t respond when I talk
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Anonymous
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Our conversations look like this:
Me: Im thinking maybe we should go to the playground before dinner so DS can play. DH: silence Me: what do you think? DH: silence Me: Honey-did you hear me? Should we go to the park? Do you think we have time? DH: silence Me: (grouchy now) DH? Are you listening? What do you think? I’m going to take DS to the park. Are you coming? DH: OK Me: what does that mean? Yes or no? Should I just go with DS by myself? Or do you want to join us? It’s maddening. This happens many times per week. Is there a diagnosis here or something? I find it extraordinarily rude but I don’t think he intends it that way. It’s not the silent treatment-he doesn’t seem obviously angry at me. I’ve tried asking him about it and told him how it makes me feel and it doesn’t feel like I’m gettinf through. |
Anonymous
| Is he staring at his phone? |
Anonymous
| Is this the only issue or does he do other disrespectful things? This is a basic respect thing. If he really can’t understand how bothersome this is I would ask him to go to counseling. |
Anonymous
Op here. Sometimes yes, but oftentimes no. |
Anonymous
Op here. Yes, thank you, it is a basic respect thing. He does other things that are disrespectful but none as blatant or crazy making as this. The other things are more absent minded professor type things that annoy me but I can live with. |
Anonymous
| Is he thinking about something else? I often have to make sure i get my DH’s attention before I start speaking. It can be annoying, but better than feeling ignored when he doesn’t respond. |
Anonymous
| Can he hear you? After some years of this behavior off and on, I found out DH knew I was talking but couldn't understand (too quick or quiet) so assumed I was talking to myself. |
Anonymous
| Maybe make him engage in active listening- when he hears you speaking, he has to repeat what you are saying back to you to show he fully understands. |
Anonymous
| Might he be hearing impaired? Or on the spectrum? |
Anonymous
| Same here OP. Usually he’s doing other things but still listening to me, like putting away dishes. |
Anonymous
| Is he hearing impaired? |
Anonymous
| My good friend had this problem at 50. Turns out she couldn’t hear her friends/husband. |
Anonymous
| Why are you asking if you should go to the park? Did you want him to come with you? Just make a decision and leave. |
Anonymous
| This sounds exactly like my BIL and it’s maddening. My husband hates communicating with him because of the lack of a response. Good luck, I know it’s frustrating and like your husband, my BIL seems oblivious to his poor communication skills. |
Anonymous
| How is your sex life? |